专题15 写作方法技巧及20篇专练
充实文章的内容三要素（Enriching the content）
Before we start
中考英语作文对于内容（content）的要求是做到切题充实，清楚完整。因此，对于考生来说，在考场中快速审题，选择合适的素材，并且能够围绕相关话题写出一篇内容充实的好文章是制胜法宝。真实又丰富的写作内容可以让你的文章更具表现力，从而更有效地和读者交流。
Read and think
让我们先看一篇作文的题目要求吧。
Write at least 60 words on the topic “I want to invent ”（以“我想要发明 ” ）为题，写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格。）
The following is for reference only．（以下表达仅供参考）
It can be used to...
It will be exciting/necessary/helpful to...
该作文题目具有强烈的未来感，需要大家发挥想象力，建议用夹叙夹议的方式描述自己想要发明的对象，并且合理阐述它的用途或优点。针对此作文题目，大家可以从 What do you want to invent Why do you want to invent it How can it benefit human beings How can it change people’s life 或 What do I need to do to create the invention 等几方面思考，确定文章的内容。
同学们想发明的物品五花八门，比如 a time machine，a pair of flying shoes，a housework robot，a pair of healing glasses，甚至还有a piece of invisible clothing等等。大家的想象力如天马行空，但是当我们确定了自己的写作目标之后，该如何描述我们的发明物呢？
我们先来看两个谜语，大家能猜到它们是什么吗？
谜语一：I am round and hard to touch. Along the outer edge, I can have ridges. I have a number and you would like to have a lot of me！
谜语二： I am often square and sometimes people cut me in half. I often have delicious stuff on me like cheese, ham and tomato. I can be brown or white.
第一个谜语的答案是 A coin，第二个迷语的答案是 A piece of bread，大家猜到了吗？
通过这两个谜语，我们不难发现描述一个物体可以从以下几个方面着手：
在描述物品的过程中，建议大家针对该物品最主要的特征进行描述，这可以帮助读者在脑海中产生直观印象。
下面我们再来看一个简单的例子吧！
A magic sleeping pillow：it feels fluffy（蓬松的） and it smells minty（薄荷味的）. It is a special sleeping pillow made from high-tech material, so it can change its shape and size flexibly（灵活地）.
大家描述完自己的发明物后，该如何将它的功能和用途向读者阐述清楚呢？它将会给我们的生活带来哪些便捷呢？我们如何去实现自己的小小发明家的梦想呢？本篇就让我们来学习几个简单的写作技巧，帮助大家充实自己的写作内容。
Writing tip
用举例子、作对照、展示效果等方法充实文章内容（Enriching the content by giving an example, contrasting or showing the effect）
在审题阶段考越并确定写作的主题之后，我们可以用以下方法来充实文章内容，使之在表述上更具说服力，内容上更饱满、更有层次。
giving examples（举例子）
making a contrast（作对照）
showing the effect（展示效果）
我们来读读以下三个介绍发明物的段落，看看它们用了哪些方法？
Match the method（s） in the box with the right paragraph. （配对。）
A. giving examples B. making a contrast C. shewing the effect
1. Paragraph 1 Method(s): A
I want to invent a smart pen to help students solve difficult problem, for example, students can use the pen to translate a long and complex sentence. By using the pen, there will be a better way for students to understand the sentence clearly.
2. Paragraph 2 Method(s): C
First of all, I think it's necessary to invent a pair of smart shoes because people can save time and money when they wear their shoes instead of driving a car to go to their destinations. Moreover, with the help of the shoes, people can keep fit and monitor their health by taking a walk in them.
3. Paragraph 3 Method(s): B
With the invention of the robots, people won't need to work for extra hours or perform some dangerous tasks in their Jobs. Nowadays, people have to work long hours and do not have enough time to develop their hobbies. Thanks to the robots, people will have more time to relax and enjoy their life.
接下来让我们动笔修改以下语句，看看是否学会了用以上这些方法来充实文章的内容。
例1: I want to invent a time machine. It can take people to the future or the past.
我们可以这样修改：I want to invent a time machine, which can take people either to the future or the past. It will assist people with their jobs. For instance, it can be useful to help the police return to the crime scene. What's more, it can take scientists to the future so that it will be convenient for them to conduct some scientific research.
我们可以尝试使用举例子的方式将时光机的功能展示出来，使文章更加直观明了，生动有趣。
例2: I’d like to invent a pair of special glasses. They can be used to protect our eyes.
我们可以这样修改：I’d like to invent a pair of special glasses. With these glasses, we will get into the habit of protecting our eyes. For example, if we read books for a long time, they will tell us to rest for a few minutes. And when we are about to do something harmful to our eyes, they will warn us immediately.
我们可以用展现效果和举例子的方法介绍这副神奇眼镜的功能。
以上两个例子只是修改建议。大家可以展开想象，选用本篇 Writing tip的方法介绍自已头脑中的时光机和神奇眼镜！
Time to write
现在，就让我们动笔写一写。在正式写文章之前，我们先思考一下如何构思整篇文章。
1. The description of the invention （size, shape, color, taste, smell, etc.）
2. The function(s) of the invention （Why do you want to invent it How can people benefit from it How can it change people's life )
3. How to achieve my goal
Treasure box
参考句型：
... enable(s) people to ... With the help of ..., we can ... ... provide(s) people with ... It's necessary/important/convenient/essential/... (for people) to do ... For example/instance, ... Without it，people can’t ... I believe this invention will bring ... to people’s life. People's life will greatly improve because ... We don't need to ... any longer because ... ... be widely used ... ... will have a big effect on ... ...
Remember to revise
写好后，可以带着以下问题修改：
Yes No
1. Is the content of my artide dosely related to the topic 文章的内容是否体现了主题？
Yes No
2. Does the content have enough details( giving an example, contrasting or showing the effect, etc.) 我使用举例子、作对照、展示效果等方法充实文章内容了吗？
在修改前，我们不妨来看看其他同学是如何修改自己的作文的。
Draft（初稿）
I want to invent a pair of magic shoes
①I want to invent a pair of magic shoes. ②They can help people fly. ③Why do I have the idea to invent such a pair of special shoes？④Because the traffic in our city is a big problem. ⑤There are a lot of cars in the street during the rush hour. ⑥More and more people own two or three cars. ⑦So the traffic is always heavy. ⑧If we have such shoes, we can fly to any place we want to go. ⑨People can enjoy more freedom in their life. ⑩Therefore, I want to invent a pair of magic shoes which can help people fly.
Jason Liu
点评：
如果能将文章分为三段，则脉络会显得更为清晰。句①—句②为第一段，句③—句⑦为第二段，句⑧—句⑩为第三段。
另外，是否可以指绘一下这双神奇的鞋子，以便读者展开想象？
小作者展示了发明这双神奇鞋子的原因和效果，但原因部分比重大大。建议删减原因部分，增加效果部分，来突出这项发明的功能。
Revised（修改稿）
I want to invent a pair of magic shoes
I want to invent a pair of magic shoes. The shoes will have colorful wings powered by solar or wind energy. They can help people fly.
How did I get the idea to invent such a pair of special shoes Because the traffic in our city is a big problem. There are a lot of cars in the street during the rush hour.
If we have magic shoes, they can make a difference in our life. We won't complain about the traffic problems any longer because we will be able to fly to any place we want to go in a flash. What's more, we can enjoy more freedom in our life and the air will be much fresher than before.
I would like to learn Physics better so that I can invent a pair of magic shoes to benefit everybody on the Earth.
Jason Liu
点评：
文章在开头增加了对发明物的描写，神奇的鞋子有着靠太阳能或风能推动的彩色翅膀，是否很可爱？主体部分增加了对这项发明效果的介绍，突出展现了神奇的鞋子会带来的社会变化。
修改后的文章是否结构更清晰，内容更丰富有趣？
现在，就让我们动笔修改自己的作文吧。
Let’s share
A
I want to invent a language machine
Learning a new language takes lots of time and energy, so I want to invent a language machine to help us learn languages.
My language machine looks like a wrist watch. It contains thousands of digital dictionaries and Bluetooth. When we wear it in another country, it can translate the native language and then send it directly to our brain.
With this machine, we won’t be afraid of causing misunderstanding anymore, especially when we are abroad. Using
different languages to communicate with foreigners will be a piece of cake.
I am looking forward to the day when I can be capable enough to invent my language machine.
Danny Lin
点评：
全文展现了小作者丰富的想象力。在他的笔下，他的语言机器轻巧如手表，但功能强大到可以储存成千上万的数字词典，也可以厉害到通过蓝牙直接将翻译好的内容传送到我们的大脑。
小作者通过使用对照和展示效果的方法，呈现了拥有此项发明的美好前景。
B
I want to invent a time machine
As a student who is experiencing modern life nowadays, I would rather learn about our history from a real experience rather than from a textbook. That’s why inventing a time machine will be my first choice if I can work as a great inventor.
My time machine will look like an ordinary helicopter, but it will be more powerful than any other time machine described in novels.
The most important use of my time machine will be visiting the best schools in the Tang Dynasty. The Tang Dynasry was famous for its education. Therefore, when I visit those ancient schools, I can not only try different ways of studying but communicate with famous people as well. Using a time machine is the most vivid way to learn history.
I’m determined to absorb（吸收） more knowledge and cultivate（培养） my talent. In this way, I can make my time machine a reality.
Anne Wang
点评：
小作者将自己对历史的爱好融入他的习作，非常有趣且有思想。
小作者先交代了发明时光机的原因，然后简要描绘了他的发明。介绍功能时，小作者用了举例法和展示效果法，让读者身临其境，产生遐想。结束语点出自己的决心，筒洁有力。
写作专练（共20篇）
一、材料作文
1．（上海浦东新·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words according to the given situation（根据所给情境，写一篇不少于60个词的回帖，标点符号不占格）
Sam 在学校的英语学习论坛里发了一个帖子，请阅读他的帖子，针对他提出的问题写一份回帖。
Sam, Posted: 2 days ago Reading problem I know reading is very important in English learning. But I can’t read as fast as most of the classmatesand I always fail to finish the reading part in time in English tests. I’m very worried. What’s the problem What should I do
Your answer
Re: Reading problem
2．（2020·上海浦东新·八年级期末）Writing（作文）
Write at least 60 words about the topic“______ made me change”以“…使我改变”为题，写一篇不少于60个字的短文，标点符号不占格。
改变是成长的必然，我们在改变中慢慢懂事、逐渐成熟。生活中的什么人物、什么东西或什么事件使你发生了什么改变？请你结合自身经历，谈谈你的感受。
（注意：短文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分。）
3．（上海普陀·八年级期末）Writing (作文)
Write at least 60 words on the topic “My dear mother, I want to tell you …” (以“我亲爱的妈妈，我想告诉你……”为题写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格)
提示：在日常生活中，妈妈给了我们无微不至的关怀，有时也有小小的烦恼。请对妈妈说出一句你最想说的话，并阐述理由，或结合你的经历谈谈体会。（注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分。）
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4．（上海市卢湾中学八年级期末）Writing (写话)
Write at least 60 words about the topic “ Reading is _______” 为题写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格。)
你喜欢阅读吗？阅读能使人明智，使人充实, 使人放松…… 请你就阅读谈谈你的感受。
The following questions are for reference only. (以下问题供参考)
1. What kind of books do you like reading ( story books, science fiction, adventure stories, encyclopedia …)
2. When do you usually read
3. What do you get from reading
（注意：文中不得出现任何姓名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
5．（上海松江·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words on the topic “A wonderful place I'd like to introduce”.
（以“我想要介绍的一个好地方”为题写一篇不少于60词的短文，标点符号不占格。）
（注意: 短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
The following points are only for reference:
① 简要描述你想要介绍的这个地方；
② 以1-2个理由说明你为何要介绍这个好地方。
6．（上海黄浦·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words on the topic“_______ brings me happiness”（以“_______为我带来快乐”为题，写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格）
我们的生活多姿多彩。在学习和生活中，总有一些经历、习惯、爱好或一些人会为你带来快乐。请结合自身经历，谈谈你的感想。
（注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、学校及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
The following is for reference only (以下表达仅供参考)
be full of make…happy be fond of
7．（上海徐汇·八年级期末）Write a short passage of at least 55 words about the topic "A successful experience".
（以“一次成功的经历”为题写一篇不少于55个词的短文。标点符号不占格。）
（注意：文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
Use the suggested questions as clues:（以下问题仅供参考）
λ When did you have your successful experience
λ How did it happen （Please write in detail）
λ What have you learnt from the experience
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8．（上海闵行·八年级期末）学校正在开展以“A greener city, a better life”为题的英语征文活动。请根据所给提示，用英语写一篇短文。
注意事项：
1. 词数：90 词左右（文章开头已给出，不计入总词数）；
2. 文中不能出现真实姓名、校名等信息；
3. 文章必须包含所提供的主要信息，并作适当发挥。
A greener city, a better life
As a middle school student in Yancheng, we should create a greener city to __________________
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二、书信作文
9．（2020·上海·八年级期末） Traffic is now becoming a more and more serious problem in Shanghai. Could you please write a letter to the mayor to give your advice on how to solve the problem Write at least 60 words. 上海的交通问题越来越严重，请你给市长写一封至少60个字的信提提建议来解决问题。
Suggested points:
* How is the traffic problem in Shanghai at the moment
* How does the traffic problem affect your life
* What good advice have you thought about on solving this problem
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三、话题作文
10．（上海青浦·八年级期末）Writing (作文):
Write a passage of at least 60 words about the topic “A/An ________ moment in my life”.
以“我生命中________一刻”为题写一篇不少于60字的短文。(补全题目，如：A happy / pleasant / sad / moving(感动的) / unhappy / exciting…moment in my life)
（注意：短文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分。）
11．（上海浦东新·八年级期末）Writing（作文）
Write at least 60 words on the topic“__________ brings happiness”（以“___________带给我快乐”为题，写一篇不少于60词的短文）
提示：在我们的成长过程中，一次旅游，一本书籍，一个好友……许多人或事都可能给我们带来快乐。选择其一，分享他／她／它给你的快乐源泉。
The following is for reference.
1. What brings you happiness
2. Why do you think so
（注意：1．请在答题纸上补全作文题目。2．短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
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12．（上海市上南中学八年级期末）Writing
Write at least 60 words on the topic “The way to be happy”
（以“The way to be happy”为题，写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格）
作为一名中学生，你每天面对很多压力。那么你是怎样在繁忙的学习生活中让自己获得快乐的呢？请谈谈你快乐的方式，并举例说明。
13．（上海·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words on the topic ‘ Great changes in Shanghai’.（以“上海的巨大变化”为题写话, 字数不少于60字）
How was Shanghai several years ago
How is it now
14．（2020·上海·世泽中学八年级期末）Writing (作文)：
Write at least 50 words on the topic “One way to be happy” (以“快乐的方法”为题，写一篇不少于50个词的短文，标点符号不占格)
古希腊哲学家Diogenes 告诉我们快乐的方法是不要过度追求物质生活。那么，你认为快乐的方法是什么呢？请结合你的个人经历，谈谈你的看法。
（注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予给分。）
15．（上海虹口·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words about the topic，“My favourite place at school”以“学校里我最喜爱的地方”为题写一篇至少60字的短文，标点符号不占格。
（注意：短文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分。）
Use the following points as a guide.（短文须包含下列要点）
What is your favourite place at school
What do you often do there (At least 2 examples)
Why is it your favourite place
My favourite place at school
16．（上海市鲁迅初级中学八年级期末） Write at least 60 words on the topic “The thing(s) I want to do most during my winter holiday” (以“寒假我最想做的事” 为题写一篇不少于60 个词的短文，标点符号不占格)
寒假即将来临，你的心情如何？你想怎么度过这个寒假呢？你最想做什么呢？为什么会有这种想法？说说理由。
17．（2020·上海市川沙中学南校八年级期末）Write at least 60 words on the topic “My favourite activity in my junior high school life.”（以“我初中生活中最喜欢的活动”为题写话。词数不少于60个，标点符号不占格，所给要点仅供参考）
在你两年多的初中生活中，你一定参加过许多活动。其中哪个是你最喜欢的？请结合自己的经历，写出真情实感，并告之为什么它是你最喜欢的活动。
（注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分）
18．（2020·上海浦东新·八年级期末） Write a passage of at least 60 words on the topic "My Holiday Plan"(以"我的假期计划", 写一篇不少于60个词的短文, 要求意思明确, 内容连贯, 标点符号不占格)
(注意:短文中不得出现考生的中文姓名及其他相关信息, 否则不予评分。)
提示(仅供参考):暑假即将来临, 你将如何度过 是出门旅游还是在家认真复习功课 还是发展一门兴趣爱好 请结合你的实际情况, 制定你自己的暑假计划。
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19．（上海·八年级期末）Writing（作文）
Write at least 60 words on the topic “An Unusual Experience”（以《一次非同寻常的经历》为题写一篇作文，不少于60词）
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20．（上海市奉贤区弘文学校八年级期末） Write a passage of at least 60 words on the topic" My dear mother, I want to tell…”(以“我亲爱的妈妈，我想告诉你…”为题写一篇不少于60个单词的短文，标点符号不占格。)
(注意:短文中不得出现考生姓名、校名及相关信息，否则不予评分。)
提示:在日常生活中，妈妈给了我们无微无至的关怀，有时也有小小的烦恼。请对妈妈说出一句你最想说的话，并阐述理由，或结合你的经历谈谈体会专题15 写作方法技巧及20篇专练
充实文章的内容三要素（Enriching the content）
Before we start
中考英语作文对于内容（content）的要求是做到切题充实，清楚完整。因此，对于考生来说，在考场中快速审题，选择合适的素材，并且能够围绕相关话题写出一篇内容充实的好文章是制胜法宝。真实又丰富的写作内容可以让你的文章更具表现力，从而更有效地和读者交流。
Read and think
让我们先看一篇作文的题目要求吧。
Write at least 60 words on the topic “I want to invent ”（以“我想要发明 ” ）为题，写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格。）
The following is for reference only．（以下表达仅供参考）
It can be used to...
It will be exciting/necessary/helpful to...
该作文题目具有强烈的未来感，需要大家发挥想象力，建议用夹叙夹议的方式描述自己想要发明的对象，并且合理阐述它的用途或优点。针对此作文题目，大家可以从 What do you want to invent Why do you want to invent it How can it benefit human beings How can it change people’s life 或 What do I need to do to create the invention 等几方面思考，确定文章的内容。
同学们想发明的物品五花八门，比如 a time machine，a pair of flying shoes，a housework robot，a pair of healing glasses，甚至还有a piece of invisible clothing等等。大家的想象力如天马行空，但是当我们确定了自己的写作目标之后，该如何描述我们的发明物呢？
我们先来看两个谜语，大家能猜到它们是什么吗？
谜语一：I am round and hard to touch. Along the outer edge, I can have ridges. I have a number and you would like to have a lot of me！
谜语二： I am often square and sometimes people cut me in half. I often have delicious stuff on me like cheese, ham and tomato. I can be brown or white.
第一个谜语的答案是 A coin，第二个迷语的答案是 A piece of bread，大家猜到了吗？
通过这两个谜语，我们不难发现描述一个物体可以从以下几个方面着手：
在描述物品的过程中，建议大家针对该物品最主要的特征进行描述，这可以帮助读者在脑海中产生直观印象。
下面我们再来看一个简单的例子吧！
A magic sleeping pillow：it feels fluffy（蓬松的） and it smells minty（薄荷味的）. It is a special sleeping pillow made from high-tech material, so it can change its shape and size flexibly（灵活地）.
大家描述完自己的发明物后，该如何将它的功能和用途向读者阐述清楚呢？它将会给我们的生活带来哪些便捷呢？我们如何去实现自己的小小发明家的梦想呢？本篇就让我们来学习几个简单的写作技巧，帮助大家充实自己的写作内容。
Writing tip
用举例子、作对照、展示效果等方法充实文章内容（Enriching the content by giving an example, contrasting or showing the effect）
在审题阶段考越并确定写作的主题之后，我们可以用以下方法来充实文章内容，使之在表述上更具说服力，内容上更饱满、更有层次。
giving examples（举例子）
making a contrast（作对照）
showing the effect（展示效果）
我们来读读以下三个介绍发明物的段落，看看它们用了哪些方法？
Match the method（s） in the box with the right paragraph. （配对。）
A. giving examples B. making a contrast C. shewing the effect
1. Paragraph 1 Method(s): A
I want to invent a smart pen to help students solve difficult problem, for example, students can use the pen to translate a long and complex sentence. By using the pen, there will be a better way for students to understand the sentence clearly.
2. Paragraph 2 Method(s): C
First of all, I think it's necessary to invent a pair of smart shoes because people can save time and money when they wear their shoes instead of driving a car to go to their destinations. Moreover, with the help of the shoes, people can keep fit and monitor their health by taking a walk in them.
3. Paragraph 3 Method(s): B
With the invention of the robots, people won't need to work for extra hours or perform some dangerous tasks in their Jobs. Nowadays, people have to work long hours and do not have enough time to develop their hobbies. Thanks to the robots, people will have more time to relax and enjoy their life.
接下来让我们动笔修改以下语句，看看是否学会了用以上这些方法来充实文章的内容。
例1: I want to invent a time machine. It can take people to the future or the past.
我们可以这样修改：I want to invent a time machine, which can take people either to the future or the past. It will assist people with their jobs. For instance, it can be useful to help the police return to the crime scene. What's more, it can take scientists to the future so that it will be convenient for them to conduct some scientific research.
我们可以尝试使用举例子的方式将时光机的功能展示出来，使文章更加直观明了，生动有趣。
例2: I’d like to invent a pair of special glasses. They can be used to protect our eyes.
我们可以这样修改：I’d like to invent a pair of special glasses. With these glasses, we will get into the habit of protecting our eyes. For example, if we read books for a long time, they will tell us to rest for a few minutes. And when we are about to do something harmful to our eyes, they will warn us immediately.
我们可以用展现效果和举例子的方法介绍这副神奇眼镜的功能。
以上两个例子只是修改建议。大家可以展开想象，选用本篇 Writing tip的方法介绍自已头脑中的时光机和神奇眼镜！
Time to write
现在，就让我们动笔写一写。在正式写文章之前，我们先思考一下如何构思整篇文章。
1. The description of the invention （size, shape, color, taste, smell, etc.）
2. The function(s) of the invention （Why do you want to invent it How can people benefit from it How can it change people's life )
3. How to achieve my goal
Treasure box
参考句型：
... enable(s) people to ... With the help of ..., we can ... ... provide(s) people with ... It's necessary/important/convenient/essential/... (for people) to do ... For example/instance, ... Without it，people can’t ... I believe this invention will bring ... to people’s life. People's life will greatly improve because ... We don't need to ... any longer because ... ... be widely used ... ... will have a big effect on ... ...
Remember to revise
写好后，可以带着以下问题修改：
Yes No
1. Is the content of my artide dosely related to the topic 文章的内容是否体现了主题？
Yes No
2. Does the content have enough details( giving an example, contrasting or showing the effect, etc.) 我使用举例子、作对照、展示效果等方法充实文章内容了吗？
在修改前，我们不妨来看看其他同学是如何修改自己的作文的。
Draft（初稿）
I want to invent a pair of magic shoes
①I want to invent a pair of magic shoes. ②They can help people fly. ③Why do I have the idea to invent such a pair of special shoes？④Because the traffic in our city is a big problem. ⑤There are a lot of cars in the street during the rush hour. ⑥More and more people own two or three cars. ⑦So the traffic is always heavy. ⑧If we have such shoes, we can fly to any place we want to go. ⑨People can enjoy more freedom in their life. ⑩Therefore, I want to invent a pair of magic shoes which can help people fly.
Jason Liu
点评：
如果能将文章分为三段，则脉络会显得更为清晰。句①—句②为第一段，句③—句⑦为第二段，句⑧—句⑩为第三段。
另外，是否可以指绘一下这双神奇的鞋子，以便读者展开想象？
小作者展示了发明这双神奇鞋子的原因和效果，但原因部分比重大大。建议删减原因部分，增加效果部分，来突出这项发明的功能。
Revised（修改稿）
I want to invent a pair of magic shoes
I want to invent a pair of magic shoes. The shoes will have colorful wings powered by solar or wind energy. They can help people fly.
How did I get the idea to invent such a pair of special shoes Because the traffic in our city is a big problem. There are a lot of cars in the street during the rush hour.
If we have magic shoes, they can make a difference in our life. We won't complain about the traffic problems any longer because we will be able to fly to any place we want to go in a flash. What's more, we can enjoy more freedom in our life and the air will be much fresher than before.
I would like to learn Physics better so that I can invent a pair of magic shoes to benefit everybody on the Earth.
Jason Liu
点评：
文章在开头增加了对发明物的描写，神奇的鞋子有着靠太阳能或风能推动的彩色翅膀，是否很可爱？主体部分增加了对这项发明效果的介绍，突出展现了神奇的鞋子会带来的社会变化。
修改后的文章是否结构更清晰，内容更丰富有趣？
现在，就让我们动笔修改自己的作文吧。
Let’s share
A
I want to invent a language machine
Learning a new language takes lots of time and energy, so I want to invent a language machine to help us learn languages.
My language machine looks like a wrist watch. It contains thousands of digital dictionaries and Bluetooth. When we wear it in another country, it can translate the native language and then send it directly to our brain.
With this machine, we won’t be afraid of causing misunderstanding anymore, especially when we are abroad. Using
different languages to communicate with foreigners will be a piece of cake.
I am looking forward to the day when I can be capable enough to invent my language machine.
Danny Lin
点评：
全文展现了小作者丰富的想象力。在他的笔下，他的语言机器轻巧如手表，但功能强大到可以储存成千上万的数字词典，也可以厉害到通过蓝牙直接将翻译好的内容传送到我们的大脑。
小作者通过使用对照和展示效果的方法，呈现了拥有此项发明的美好前景。
B
I want to invent a time machine
As a student who is experiencing modern life nowadays, I would rather learn about our history from a real experience rather than from a textbook. That’s why inventing a time machine will be my first choice if I can work as a great inventor.
My time machine will look like an ordinary helicopter, but it will be more powerful than any other time machine described in novels.
The most important use of my time machine will be visiting the best schools in the Tang Dynasty. The Tang Dynasry was famous for its education. Therefore, when I visit those ancient schools, I can not only try different ways of studying but communicate with famous people as well. Using a time machine is the most vivid way to learn history.
I’m determined to absorb（吸收） more knowledge and cultivate（培养） my talent. In this way, I can make my time machine a reality.
Anne Wang
点评：
小作者将自己对历史的爱好融入他的习作，非常有趣且有思想。
小作者先交代了发明时光机的原因，然后简要描绘了他的发明。介绍功能时，小作者用了举例法和展示效果法，让读者身临其境，产生遐想。结束语点出自己的决心，筒洁有力。
写作专练（共20套）
一、材料作文
1．（上海浦东新·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words according to the given situation（根据所给情境，写一篇不少于60个词的回帖，标点符号不占格）
Sam 在学校的英语学习论坛里发了一个帖子，请阅读他的帖子，针对他提出的问题写一份回帖。
Sam, Posted: 2 days ago Reading problem I know reading is very important in English learning. But I can’t read as fast as most of the classmatesand I always fail to finish the reading part in time in English tests. I’m very worried. What’s the problem What should I do
Your answer
Re: Reading problem
【答案】Don't lose heart. Confidence will solve many problems. There are some solutions to improve your English reading.
First of all, recite the words. Because the sentences read in English are composed of words, you will be more fluent when you are familiar with the words.Secondly, you should listen to the radio, English news and cultivate your sense of language.Finally, show yourself in public.
After a while, you will find that you will improve a lot.
【详解】
1、题干解读：本文需要回复帖子，而原帖中最后的两个问题：问题是什么？我应该怎样做？回帖需要回答这两个问题。
2、例文点评：例文采用三段式，时态采用一般现在时，描述解决办法时，详细细致；条理清晰，逻辑性强。
3、高分亮点：
短语：lose heart；First of all；be composed of；be familiar with；in public；improve a lot。
句型：There be句型；because引导原因状语从句；you will be more fluent when you are familiar with the words。
【点睛】
首先认真审题，看清题目中的要求和要点；然后根据提示内容，列出写作要点及每个要点中可能要用到的表达，例如lose heart；First of all；be composed of；be familiar with；in public；improve a lot以及状语从句等；然后紧扣要点，动笔写作，在写作过程中，要注意句与句、段与段之间的过渡，必要时可适当运用表示转折、因果、并列、比较等关系的连词，使文章过渡平稳，自然流畅；最后，要仔细检查有无单词拼写错误、标点符号误用等，还要检查语法结构是否合理，有无重复、啰嗦的语言，大小写是否正确，词数是否符合要求等。
2．（2020·上海浦东新·八年级期末）Writing（作文）
Write at least 60 words about the topic“______ made me change”以“…使我改变”为题，写一篇不少于60个字的短文，标点符号不占格。
改变是成长的必然，我们在改变中慢慢懂事、逐渐成熟。生活中的什么人物、什么东西或什么事件使你发生了什么改变？请你结合自身经历，谈谈你的感受。
（注意：短文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分。）
【答案】例文
My teacher made me change
At first, I was not interested in English. My English teacher Miss Li changed my life.
One day, Miss Li told us we would have an English speech two weeks later. I was not happy. My English was so poor that I was afraid to speak in public. She came up to me and said “Be confident in yourself and you’ll make it.” Then I studied hard and practiced every day. I got the first prize at last. Now I understand that if you decide to do something and put your heart into it, you will succeed.
【详解】
1.题干解读：该题目属于记叙文写作，叙述生活中的人/物/事使人产生的改变，结合自身经历，谈谈感受。
2.例文点评：例文用第一人称进行叙述，时态采用一般过去时为主，事件起因和过程等叙述条理清晰。在叙述时，避免汉语式英语，语言表达符合英语习惯，准确运用时态、句型等，句意完整，语句通顺，语义连贯。
3.高分亮点：
短语：be interested in；have an English speech；in public；be confident in；at last；put one’s heart into。
句型：①At first, I was not interested in English.
②My English was so poor that I was afraid to speak in public.
③Be confident in yourself and you’ll make it.
④Now I understand that if you decide to do something and put your heart into it, you will succeed.
【点睛】
写作六步骤：1.审题：文体，时态，人称。2.抓住要点：要点是否齐全，适当补充。3.扩充句子：通过增加状语，定语，连词，使句子意思饱满充实。4.连句成文，合理使用连词。5.改正错误：拼写是否错误，语法时态是否正确，连词是否恰当等。6.誊写作文：注意书写工整美观整洁。
3．（上海普陀·八年级期末）Writing (作文)
Write at least 60 words on the topic “My dear mother, I want to tell you …” (以“我亲爱的妈妈，我想告诉你……”为题写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格)
提示：在日常生活中，妈妈给了我们无微不至的关怀，有时也有小小的烦恼。请对妈妈说出一句你最想说的话，并阐述理由，或结合你的经历谈谈体会。（注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分。）
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
【答案】My dear mother, I want to tell you I love you.
In our daily life, our mother gives us meticulous care, sometimes there are small troubles. What I want to say to my mother most is "Mom, I love you, thank you.". I remember one snowy winter night last year, when I suddenly had a fever, my mother took me to the hospital. At that time, the snow on the ground was thick and we couldn't ride the bike, so my mother carried me on her back. I insisted on walking by myself, but my mother said that I couldn't be tired. When I got to the hospital, my mother's hands and face were frozen, and her shoes were wet. But my mother first treated me and accompanied me in the hospital all night , she didn't sleep, I feel very happy with my mother.
【详解】
1.题干解读：这里是一篇命题作文。在日常生活中，妈妈给了我们无微不至的关怀，有时也有小小的烦恼。请对妈妈说出一句你最想说的话，并阐述理由，或结合你的经历谈谈体会。以“我亲爱的妈妈，我想告诉你……”为题写一篇不少于60个词的短文。
2.例文点评：这是一篇给材料作文。本文给出了一些要点，并给出了作文的开头和结尾。根据文中提示，并适当发挥想象说出自己的观点。动笔前要认真阅读材料，不要遗漏要点，并适当发挥。根据材料内容可知本文主要是用一般现在时态和一般过去时态、第一人称单数来写，要注意主谓一致等问题。写作中要适当使用连词，注意上下文联系紧密，符合逻辑关系。
3.高分亮点：
短语：in our daily life；one snowy winter night ；last year；take me to the hospita；insisted on doing ；got to the hospital；
句型：At that time, the snow on the ground was thick and we couldn't ride the bike,；so my mother carried me on her back.；When I got to the hospital, my mother's hands and face were frozen, and her shoes were wet.
4．（上海市卢湾中学八年级期末）Writing (写话)
Write at least 60 words about the topic “ Reading is _______” 为题写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格。)
你喜欢阅读吗？阅读能使人明智，使人充实, 使人放松…… 请你就阅读谈谈你的感受。
The following questions are for reference only. (以下问题供参考)
1. What kind of books do you like reading ( story books, science fiction, adventure stories, encyclopedia …)
2. When do you usually read
3. What do you get from reading
（注意：文中不得出现任何姓名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
【答案】Reading is a good habit
Reading is a good habit. I like reading very much. When I am free I often read some story books, because most of them are quite interesting. My favorite book is Readers. Readers cover the knowledge of culture and history. I can benefit a lot by reading it.
I think forming a good reading habit is necessary for us. It can not only open up our eyes but also improve our knowledge. While reading, I can get a lot of happiness. Through reading, I learn a lot about the world and become more and more knowledgable.
All in all,reading is a good habit that I will keep forever.
【详解】
1.题干解读：本文是一篇提纲作文， 要求写一篇有关阅读的作文，谈谈对阅读的感受。要求包括以下内容要点：1你喜欢什么种类的书；2.你通常什么时间阅读；3.从阅读中你得到了什么。首先要认真审题，根据提示内容，列出写作要点及每个要点中可能要用到的表达；然后紧扣要点，动笔写作。
2.例文点评：文章在陈述时用一般现在时。人称主要为第一人称。本文以Reading is a good habit为题，并开篇点题；文中讲到自己在空闲时阅读，自己最喜欢的书为读者；第三段主要写了自己对阅读的看法及从中得到了什么。本文紧扣题目要点，内容完整，表述准确，语言的表述符合语法的结构，造句符合英语的表达习惯。
3.高分亮点：
短语：the knowledge of culture and history；benefit a lot by reading it；not only …but also…；open up our eyes；learn a lot about等。
句型：1. I think forming a good reading habit is necessary for us.2. It can not only open up our eyes but also improve our knowledge. 3. Through reading, I learn a lot about the world and become more and more knowledgable..
【点睛】
写作时要根据提示进行书面表达，围绕主题准确使用一定的语法、词汇、短语和句型等，清楚连贯地表达自己的思想，进而完成写作任务。
5．（上海松江·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words on the topic “A wonderful place I'd like to introduce”.
（以“我想要介绍的一个好地方”为题写一篇不少于60词的短文，标点符号不占格。）
（注意: 短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
The following points are only for reference:
① 简要描述你想要介绍的这个地方；
② 以1-2个理由说明你为何要介绍这个好地方。
【答案】例文:
A wonderful place I'd like to introduce
I would like to introduce the Great Wall to you. It is one of the greatest wonders of the world, which attracts a lot of visitors every year. Besides, it has a long history of about 2,700 years. Just like a long dragon, it winds up and down across deserts, grasslands, mountains and plateaus, stretching approximately 21,196 kilometers from east to west of China. If you go to the Great Wall, you can feel the wisdom and courage of the Chinese.
【详解】
1.题干解读：该题目属于应用文写作，写作时要按应用文格式写。在写作时开头引出我想要介绍长城；接下来表达我想要介绍长城的原因；最后介绍去长城参观，会感受到中国人的智慧和勇敢。
2.例文点评：例文采用一段式；用第一、三人称来介绍长城；时态采用一般现在时，介绍长城的历史，长度，跨过的地形。文中叙述完整且条理清晰。写作中注意运用代词，注意多种句式交替运用。写作中注意叙述顺序，符合逻辑关系。
3.高分亮点：
短语：would like to，introduce sth to sb，a long history of，up and down，from…to…。
句型：定语从句which attracts a lot of visitors every year；条件状语从句If you go to the Great Wall。
6．（上海黄浦·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words on the topic“_______ brings me happiness”（以“_______为我带来快乐”为题，写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格）
我们的生活多姿多彩。在学习和生活中，总有一些经历、习惯、爱好或一些人会为你带来快乐。请结合自身经历，谈谈你的感想。
（注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、学校及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
The following is for reference only (以下表达仅供参考)
be full of make…happy be fond of
【答案】例文
Reading brings me happiness
My life is full of happiness because of reading. It brings me a lot of knowledge as well as plenty of improvement. Besides, reading can reduce my time on watching TV and playing computer games. I can spend more time on my subjects. What’s more, reading is also extremely necessary in my study life, with which I can make great progress. All in all, reading has brought me so much happiness that I can hardly stop reading. I strongly recommend you to read more books and get more useful information.
【详解】
1.题干解读：该题目属于记叙文写作，写作时要按记叙文格式写。在写作时开头介绍读书给我的生活带来快乐；接下来介绍读书带来的其他好处；最后我建议多读书。
2.例文点评：例文采用一段式；用第三人称来叙述读书的好处；时态采用一般现在时，介绍读书给我带来了快乐和学习进步，叙述完整且条理清晰。写作中注意运用代词，注意多种句式交替运用。写作中注意叙述顺序，符合逻辑关系。
3.高分亮点：
短语：be full of，as well as，what’s more，all in all，stop doing sth，recommend sb to do sth。
句型：定语从句with which I can make great progress；状语从句so much happiness that I can hardly stop reading。
7．（上海徐汇·八年级期末）Write a short passage of at least 55 words about the topic "A successful experience".
（以“一次成功的经历”为题写一篇不少于55个词的短文。标点符号不占格。）
（注意：文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
Use the suggested questions as clues:（以下问题仅供参考）
λ When did you have your successful experience
λ How did it happen （Please write in detail）
λ What have you learnt from the experience
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【答案】例文：
A successful experience
I can still remember the sports meeting when I was in middle school. I took part in the 800-meter race on that day. At first, I was afraid of running. I thought I could not finish such a long distance. I wanted to give up. At this time, my classmates encouraged me. So I tried my best to run. At last, I was the second to finish. Although I was not the first one, I thought I finished the race, and this was a success for me.
【详解】
1.题干解读：该题目属于记叙文写作，写作时要按记叙文格式写。开头介绍我的成功经历发生的时间；接下来介绍事情发生的过程；最后介绍我从这次经历中学到的东西。
2.例文点评：例文采用一段式；用第一人称来叙述故事内容；时态采用一般现在时和一般过去时，用一般过去时叙述我的经历，介绍全面，条理清晰，用连词连接并列成分，文章前后连贯。
3.高分亮点：
短语：take part in，be afraid of，give up，try one’s best to do，at last。
句型：时间状语从句when I was in middle school；宾语从句I could not finish such a long distance；让步状语从句Although I was not the first one。
8．（上海闵行·八年级期末）学校正在开展以“A greener city, a better life”为题的英语征文活动。请根据所给提示，用英语写一篇短文。
注意事项：
1. 词数：90 词左右（文章开头已给出，不计入总词数）；
2. 文中不能出现真实姓名、校名等信息；
3. 文章必须包含所提供的主要信息，并作适当发挥。
A greener city, a better life
As a middle school student in Yancheng, we should create a greener city to __________________
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【答案】A greener city, a better life
As a middle school student in Yancheng, we should create a greener city to live a better life.
However, it’s a pity that we often see some people drop litter everywhere. Some forget to turn off the lights when leaving a room.
To create a greener city, ride or walk to school instead of taking a car. Also, we can plant more trees and flowers. Besides, it’s a good idea to separate the rubbish into different groups so that things like bottles and cans can be recycled.
In all, if everyone does his part, we can live a better life in a greener city.
【详解】
这篇短文使用了大量的固定句式和短语，为文章增色不少，如as a middle school student、live a better life、see sb. do sth.、forget to do、turn off、walk to school、instead of、separate into、so that、in all等。而固定句型“it’s a good idea to separate the rubbish into different groups so that things like bottles and cans can be recycled.”和“it’s a pity that we often see some people drop litter everywhere./ Some forget to turn off the lights when leaving a room./ if everyone does his part, we can live a better life in a greener city.”等复杂从句结构的运用，丰富了短文内容，使表达多样化，是本文的亮点。在学习中注意总结牢记一些固定句式及短语，写作时就可以适当引用，使文章表达更有逻辑性，也更富有条理。
【点睛】
书面表达题既不是汉译英，也不是可任意发挥的作文。它要求将所规定的材料内容经整理后展开思维，考查运用所学英语知识准确表达意思的能力。所以，考生不能遗漏要点，要尽量使用自己熟悉的单词、短语和句式，尽可能使用高级词汇和较复杂的句式结构以便得到较高的分数。
二、书信作文
9．（2020·上海·八年级期末） Traffic is now becoming a more and more serious problem in Shanghai. Could you please write a letter to the mayor to give your advice on how to solve the problem Write at least 60 words. 上海的交通问题越来越严重，请你给市长写一封至少60个字的信提提建议来解决问题。
Suggested points:
* How is the traffic problem in Shanghai at the moment
* How does the traffic problem affect your life
* What good advice have you thought about on solving this problem
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【答案】范文
A Letter to Mayor
Respected mayor,
I’m a student from XXX. I’m worried about the traffic in Shanghai. It’s becoming a more and more serious problem, especially during rush hour because many people go to work in their own cars and some people don’t obey the traffic rules.
I know Shanghai is trying to solve the traffic problem in different ways. However, the problem hasn’t been solved yet. I think it’s a good idea for the government to improve the public transportation so that more and more people would like to take the subway or buses. In addition, the government had better reduce the number of cars by increasing the cost of driving.
I really hope there will be fewer traffic problems in our city.
Best wishes
XX
【详解】
1.题干解读：该题目要求包含目前上海的交通问题怎么样；交通问题如何影响你的生活；对于解决这个问题你有什么好的建议。
2.例文点评：例文通过对目前上海的交通问题怎么样；交通问题如何影响你的生活；对于解决这个问题你有什么好的建议等一一讲述。语句通顺，条理清晰，词组，短语，句型等运用灵活。
3.高分亮点：词组：be worried about；a serious problem；obey the traffic rules；solve the traffic problem；in different ways；improve the public transportation；so that；In addition；the cost of driving等。
句型： It’s becoming a more and more serious problem, especially during rush hour because many people go to work in their own cars and some people don’t obey the traffic rules./I know Shanghai is trying to solve the traffic problem in different ways./I think it’s a good idea for the government to improve the public transportation so that more and more people would like to take the subway or buses./I really hope there will be fewer traffic problems in our city.
【点睛】
书面表达：
首先认真审题，看清题目中的要求和要点；然后根据提示内容，列出写作要点及每个要点中可能要用到的表达，例如be worried about；a serious problem；obey the traffic rules；solve the traffic problem；in different ways；In addition；the cost of driving等；然后紧扣要点，动笔写作，在写作过程中，要注意句与句、段与段之间的过渡，必要时可适当运用表示转折、因果、并列、比较等关系的连词，使文章过渡平稳，自然流畅，如however；最后，要仔细检查有无单词拼写错误、标点符号误用等，还要检查语法结构是否合理，有无重复、啰嗦的语言，大小写是否正确，词数是否符合要求等。
三、话题作文
10．（上海青浦·八年级期末）Writing (作文):
Write a passage of at least 60 words about the topic “A/An ________ moment in my life”.
以“我生命中________一刻”为题写一篇不少于60字的短文。(补全题目，如：A happy / pleasant / sad / moving(感动的) / unhappy / exciting…moment in my life)
（注意：短文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分。）
【答案】A unforgettable moment in my life
I remember that was a rainy day. I failed the English exam, and I felt so sad. What’s worse, I forgot bringing my umbrella. On my way home, as the raindrops beat against me, tears were full of my eyes. Suddenly, the raindrops disappeared. I thought the rain finally stopped .But as I looked up , I saw Jane, my best friend. She looked into my eyes, and said , “An exam doesn’t mean anything. I believe you will make progress if you work hard at it.” Her words really touched me and cheered me up. After that, I studied harder than ever before and I made great progress .Years after, I still remember the moment when Jane came to me and gave me courage.
【分析】
本篇为话题作文，按照要求完成一篇短文，讲述自己生命中……的时刻。要求语言连贯，逻辑清晰。
【详解】
1.题干解读：本篇话题作文要求用第一人称、一般过去时讲述讲述“自己生命中……的时刻”；书写时要注意情节完整，文句通顺。
2.例文点评：本例文结构严谨，层次分明。开篇讲述情节的开端是我英语考试失利，当我伤心不已时，我的好朋友给了我鼓励，让我多年后还没有忘却那暖心的一刻；情节叙述完整，文章布局合理，内容完整连贯。
3.高分亮点：本篇例文短语丰富、句式多样。开篇用宾语从句I remember that was a rainy day切入主题；用What’s worse来连接下文，描述自己在考试失利又淋雨的伤心场景；用定语从句I still remember the moment when Jane came to me and gave me courage点题，总结全文；情节完整，行文通畅。
【点睛】
本篇话题作文，确定用第一人称、一般过去时讲述“自己生命中……的时刻”；书写是要注意情节完整，围绕中心词展开，交代清楚：……事情 ，为什么会让你……（中心词）。
11．（上海浦东新·八年级期末）Writing（作文）
Write at least 60 words on the topic“__________ brings happiness”（以“___________带给我快乐”为题，写一篇不少于60词的短文）
提示：在我们的成长过程中，一次旅游，一本书籍，一个好友……许多人或事都可能给我们带来快乐。选择其一，分享他／她／它给你的快乐源泉。
The following is for reference.
1. What brings you happiness
2. Why do you think so
（注意：1．请在答题纸上补全作文题目。2．短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。）
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【答案】Friends bring me happiness
I believe that everyone can live a happy life. In my opinion, it is friends that bring me happiness. When I'm in trouble, my friends are always around me and ready to do me a favor, which makes me feel happy. However, friendship is a round way ticket. I have already received so much love. Therefore ,in order to keep our friendship strong, I should do more to help my friends. I should listen to them patiently when they're annoyed by something. I should give my shoulder to them when they feel sad. And I should share all the happiness with them so that the happiness is twice than before.
All in all, friends can bring a lot of happiness. Why don't you build a wonderful friendship for yourself, my friend
【教师】
【详解】
1.题干解读：该题目属于半命题作文，写作时首先要补充完整题目，题干中给出了提示，成长过程中，一次旅游，一本书籍，一个好友……许多人或事都可能带来快乐。选择其一即可写作。要注意补充细节，讲清楚为什么能带给自己快乐，如何带给自己快乐，自己的想法是什么。
2.例文点评：例文采用两段式；用第一人称来论述；时态采用一般现在时为主，谈了自己对于朋友的看法，朋友是怎样帮助自己的，为了保持长久的友谊自己打算做什么等，最后还发出了动员，动员每个人建立一段美好的友谊。
3.高分亮点：
短语：live a happy life；in trouble；ready to do；be annoyed by；share happiness with。
句型：It is…that…句型；when引导的时间状语从句，in order to，sot hat。
【点睛】
这篇文章的亮点在于正确使用了连词，例如however“然而”，therefore“因此”，通过连词的巧妙使用使得文章叙述更加细致，逻辑层次更加分明。最后本文有收尾段，all in all“总而言之”的使用使其增色不少，总体来说这篇文章完成了既定的写作任务。
12．（上海市上南中学八年级期末）Writing
Write at least 60 words on the topic “The way to be happy”
（以“The way to be happy”为题，写一篇不少于60个词的短文，标点符号不占格）
作为一名中学生，你每天面对很多压力。那么你是怎样在繁忙的学习生活中让自己获得快乐的呢？请谈谈你快乐的方式，并举例说明。
【答案】To be happy is good for health. Having a good mood helps build a strong body. Not all the things in my life will make me happy and something bad may drive me crazy. Here are some ways I use to be happy.
First, when I am unpleasant, I will listen to music. Music will make me relaxed and feel good. Second, there are many things, some are good and some are bad. Never put bad things in heart. I just remember good things. Finally, as a popular saying goes, “Helping others is the source of happiness.” It brings me a lot of fun indeed. No doubt helping others makes me happy.
When you are not happy , you can try my ways. I think you will be happy, too.
【详解】
此题是一篇话题作文，要求以The way to be happy为题，写一篇短文。切忌认真审题，此题要求以第一人称书写，并举例说明你的快乐方式。
本例文人称为第一人称，题材是议论文，时态是一般现在时和一般将来时。本文是三段式书写，第一段简要说明快乐的好处，以“我”快乐的方式结尾，引出下段“我”是怎么让自己快乐的。第二段是讲述“我”的快乐方式，分条书写，简单明了。第三段总结性结尾。
高分亮点：不定式作主语；make sb. do sth.；drive sb. crazy；as a saying goes；there be句型。
13．（上海·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words on the topic ‘ Great changes in Shanghai’.（以“上海的巨大变化”为题写话, 字数不少于60字）
How was Shanghai several years ago
How is it now
【答案】Great changes in Shanghai
With the development of science and technology,great changes have taken place in Shanghai.
Many years ago, there used to be narrow and old bridges,roads and houses in Shanghai.But now we can find long bridges,wide roads as well as high buildings everywhere.People live in Shanghai used to be live in small houses in narrow streets,but now most of them are living in big and comfortable apartments.we can see grass,lakes and parks here and there.
As the member of Shanghai,I am proud of these changes.We are sure that the tomorrow of Shanghai will be better.
【详解】
1、题干解读：该题目主要写上海的过去与现在的变化。
2、例文点评：第一段写社会与技术的发展，上海发生了许多变化引出下文；第二段通过上海今昔对比来描述变化；最后一段总结，希望上海这个城市越来越好。描述过去时用一般过去时；描述现在用一般现在时；表达美好的愿望时，用一般将来时。
3、高分亮点：
短语：take place；here and there；used to do；be proud of…。
句型：there used to be句型；with复合结构；be sure that+从句。
【点睛】
首先认真审题，看清题目中的要求和要点；然后根据提示内容，列出写作要点及每个要点中可能要用到的表达，例如take place；here and there；used to do；be proud of…以及宾语从句等；然后紧扣要点，动笔写作，在写作过程中，要注意句与句、段与段之间的过渡，必要时可适当运用表示转折、因果、并列、比较等关系的连词，使文章过渡平稳，自然流畅；最后，要仔细检查有无单词拼写错误、标点符号误用等，还要检查语法结构是否合理，有无重复、啰嗦的语言，大小写是否正确，词数是否符合要求等。
14．（2020·上海·世泽中学八年级期末）Writing (作文)：
Write at least 50 words on the topic “One way to be happy” (以“快乐的方法”为题，写一篇不少于50个词的短文，标点符号不占格)
古希腊哲学家Diogenes 告诉我们快乐的方法是不要过度追求物质生活。那么，你认为快乐的方法是什么呢？请结合你的个人经历，谈谈你的看法。
（注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予给分。）
【答案】例文
To be happy is good for health. Having a good mood helps build a strong body. Not all the things in my life will make me happy and something bad may drive me crazy. Here are some ways I use to be happy.
First, when I am unpleasant, I will listen to music. Music will make me relaxed and feel good. Second, there are many things, some are good and some are bad. Never put bad things in heart. I just remember good things. Finally, as a popular saying goes, “Helping others is the source of happiness.” It brings me a lot of fun indeed. No doubt helping others makes me happy.
When you are not happy, you can try my ways. I think you will be happy, too.
【详解】
题目解读：本文是一篇话题作文，用古希腊哲学家Diogenes的话引出对快乐方法的探究。题目要求根据个人经历，谈谈自己对快乐的方法的看法。
例文点评：本例文人称为第一人称，题材是议论文，时态是一般现在时和一般将来时。本文是三段式书写，第一段简要说明快乐的好处，以“我”快乐的方式结尾，引出下段“我”是怎么让自己快乐的。第二段是讲述“我”的快乐方式，分条书写，简单明了。第三段总结性结尾。
高分亮点：
短语：make sb. do sth.；drive sb. crazy；as a saying goes。
句型：To be happy is good for health.；Here are some ways I use to be happy.；Second, there are many things, some are good and some are bad.。
15．（上海虹口·八年级期末）Write at least 60 words about the topic，“My favourite place at school”以“学校里我最喜爱的地方”为题写一篇至少60字的短文，标点符号不占格。
（注意：短文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分。）
Use the following points as a guide.（短文须包含下列要点）
What is your favourite place at school
What do you often do there (At least 2 examples)
Why is it your favourite place
My favourite place at school
【答案】例文
My favourite place at school
My favorite place at school is the reading room. It is very big and bright. There are a lot of useful books, newspapers and magazines there.
I like reading books and magazines there because they not only provide me with much knowledge, but also help me learn a lot about what is happening around the world. Sometimes I even feel I can have a talk with the people in the books.
I can also relax myself in the peaceful environment there. When I feel tired and unhappy, the reading room is the best place to go to. Reading helps me forget all my troubles.
For me, reading room is the place I like best.
【详解】
1. 题干解读：本题属于话题作文。要求根据问题提示介绍一下在学校里最喜欢的地方。写作时要紧扣提示内容并进行适当发挥。适当使用副词和连词等增加亮点。写好时，再阅读一遍，减少语法错误，不要犯单词拼写上的错误。
2. 例文点评：这是一篇比较优秀的例文。例文紧扣题目要求，根据问题提示介绍了自己在学校里最喜欢的地方，并在讲述在那里做的事情的同时介绍了喜欢的理由。例文首尾呼应，简明扼要，结构清晰，语言表达到位。
3. 高分亮点：
单词和短语：even；peaceful；a lot of；like doing sth.；not only … but also …；have a talk with sb.；relax oneself。
句型：there be句型；because引导的原因状语从句；宾语从句；when引导的时间状语从句。
16．（上海市鲁迅初级中学八年级期末） Write at least 60 words on the topic “The thing(s) I want to do most during my winter holiday” (以“寒假我最想做的事” 为题写一篇不少于60 个词的短文，标点符号不占格)
寒假即将来临，你的心情如何？你想怎么度过这个寒假呢？你最想做什么呢？为什么会有这种想法？说说理由。
【答案】例文：
The winter holiday is coming. Like others, I am very excited. Everybody in our class has lots of things to do, such as travelling with their family, play together with their friends and so on. But for me, I have some things to do, which are different from others.
During my winter holiday, I will take part in an activity, whose purpose is to help the children in poor areas. As we know, the children in poor areas need more help and care. I would like to help them with their study. I can donate some books to them as well. I hope that they can have a beautiful life.
I think it will be a meaningful winter holiday, and I will do my best to help the children in need.
【详解】
1.题干解读：该题目是话题作文，围绕“寒假最想做的事情”完成，内容包含自己想做的事事情，寒假到来的心情以及想做这些事情的原因。
2.例文点评：例文采用三段式结构，第一段表述寒假来临，都很激动，并且都有自己的寒假计划；第二段表述作者自己的寒假想做的事情以及原因；第三段表述作者自己会尽全力做好自己的事情。整篇文章内容完整，结构清晰条理；人称主要是第一人称，时态主要是一般现在时。
3.高分亮点：
短语：be excited；lots of；such as；play together with；and so on；be different from；take part in；do one’s best。
句型：is coming现在进行时表将来；which引导的非限制性定语从句；whose引导的非限制性定语从句；that引导的宾语从句。
17．（2020·上海市川沙中学南校八年级期末）Write at least 60 words on the topic “My favourite activity in my junior high school life.”（以“我初中生活中最喜欢的活动”为题写话。词数不少于60个，标点符号不占格，所给要点仅供参考）
在你两年多的初中生活中，你一定参加过许多活动。其中哪个是你最喜欢的？请结合自己的经历，写出真情实感，并告之为什么它是你最喜欢的活动。
（注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其他相关信息，否则不予评分）
【答案】My Favourite Activity in My Junior High School Life
Among all the activities, I enjoyed the English drama contest most, for it never fails to give us a meaningful and enjoyable experience.
In the last year’s festival, my fellow partners and I prepared for the show for several months during which we discussed the details of the script, spent our spare time rehearsing together and even made our own props cut down expenses. This activity aroused our interests in English by allowing us to get away from textbooks for a while and put what we’ve learnt in classes into use.
I truly wish my fellow schoolmates could gain more fun in the activities of this kind by plunging into them.
【详解】
1、题干解读：本文属于记叙文，题目已给出，在写的过程中，务必要将题干要求的内容全部包括其中，可适当添加，但不能跑题，围绕“活动”这个主题即可。
2、例文点评：例文用第一人称来叙述内容；时态采用一般过去时为主；描写流利顺畅，无语法错误。
3、高分亮点：
for 表示因为，引导并列句
fail to do sth. 做某事失败了
prepare for 为……做准备
during which 引导的定语从句
spent…(in) doing sth. 花费……在做某事上
cut down 削减；减少
by doing 通过做某事
what 引导的宾语从句
put…into use 把……投入使用
plunge into 投入做某事
18．（2020·上海浦东新·八年级期末） Write a passage of at least 60 words on the topic "My Holiday Plan"(以"我的假期计划", 写一篇不少于60个词的短文, 要求意思明确, 内容连贯, 标点符号不占格)
(注意:短文中不得出现考生的中文姓名及其他相关信息, 否则不予评分。)
提示(仅供参考):暑假即将来临, 你将如何度过 是出门旅游还是在家认真复习功课 还是发展一门兴趣爱好 请结合你的实际情况, 制定你自己的暑假计划。
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【答案】例文
My Holiday Plan
The summer vacation is coming. We will have a two-month holiday. I am going to relax myself. I will visit my grandparents and spend two weeks with them. I am going to help my grandparents with the housework. Of course, I am going hiking with my grandparents. Perhaps, I am going to take a short trip. My parents and I decide to go to the beach because we like swimming in the sea. Besides, I am going to visit my old friends. I think we will have a happy time together. I will be in Grade 9 in a new term, so I am going to make some preparations. I am sure I will have a busy holiday.
【详解】
1.题干解读：该题属于话题作文。写作时要主要围绕我的暑假假期计划展开讨论。
2.例文点评：例文采用一段式，主要讲述了我假期里准备看望祖父母，帮助祖母做家务，和祖父去旅游，和他们一起度过暑假，还准备看望老朋友，思路清晰，表达正确。用第一人称进行写作；时态采用一般将来时为主。
3.高分亮点：
短语：help sb. with sth.，go hiking，take a trip，make some preparations，decide to do sth.。
句型：because引导的原因状语从句，that引导宾语从句，so连接表因果关系的并列句。
19．（上海·八年级期末）Writing（作文）
Write at least 60 words on the topic “An Unusual Experience”（以《一次非同寻常的经历》为题写一篇作文，不少于60词）
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【答案】An Unusual Experience
Everyone has his own unusual experience. I would like to share my experience.
Last year, I went to ski with my friend, Li Mei. We were playing happily on the ice when I heard a shout “Help”. I turned back and was surprised to see a boy falling into an ice hole. But neither of us could swim. So Li Mei and I ran to ask for help. A few minutes later, a policeman came and pulled the boy out of the water. What an unusual experience it was!
【详解】
1. 题干解读：这个题目要求我们以An Unusual Experience为题，介绍自己的一次不寻常的经历。是一个话题作文，题目只给了作文的标题，而并没有规定具体的写作内容，所以学生们应发挥自己的想象力，联系自己的日常生活，讲述自己的一次不寻常的经历。注意题目，叙述的经历应体现“不寻常”的特点。文章应以一般过去时、第一人称为主来叙述。
2. 例文分析：短文是一篇优秀的作文，作者叙述了自己生活中一次救人的经历。文章按照事情发展顺序记叙，叙述清晰、有条理。文章使用了一般过去时态、第一人称叙述，符合表达需要。谓语动词形式准确，语法规范。句式结构完整，使用了简单句、并列句和复合句，句式多变，文意连贯、表达流畅。
3. 高分亮点：
短语：would like to；went skiing；turned back；fall into；ask for help；pulled…out of。
句型：We were playing happily on the ice when I heard a shout “Help”.；I turned back and was surprised to see a boy falling into an ice hole.；A few minutes later, a policeman came and pulled the boy out of the water. ；What an unusual experience it was!
【点睛】
这是一个话题作文，要求记叙一次不寻常的经历。写作中有两个难点：第一个是题目中并没有给出具体的写作内容，学生们应发挥自己的想象力，结合自己的实际生活，选取生活中具体的一个事例，用正确的英语表达出来。例文中作者选取了在滑雪的时候救人的一次经历，能体现题目中叙述“不寻常”经历的要求，内容叙述完整、过程清晰。第二个难点就是英语的表达问题，注意不能逐词翻译，写汉语式的英语。应从句子的整体结构出发，写完整的句子。例文中使用了丰富的句型，简单句、并列句、复合句都有，文章表达有节奏感，文意连贯、表达流畅。
20．（上海市奉贤区弘文学校八年级期末） Write a passage of at least 60 words on the topic" My dear mother, I want to tell…”(以“我亲爱的妈妈，我想告诉你…”为题写一篇不少于60个单词的短文，标点符号不占格。)
(注意:短文中不得出现考生姓名、校名及相关信息，否则不予评分。)
提示:在日常生活中，妈妈给了我们无微无至的关怀，有时也有小小的烦恼。请对妈妈说出一句你最想说的话，并阐述理由，或结合你的经历谈谈体会
【答案】例文：
My dear mother, I want to tell you I love you
In my heart, my mother is my sun. Without my mother’s care, I couldn’t grow up well. I want to tell my mother I love you.
I remember when I was a child, the school held an English speech contest, I also took part in it. I thought my English is good, I can win the championship, but in the competition, I was so nervous that I made mistakes on the platform. As a result, I didn’t win the championship. I was so sad that I cried. After that, I lost interest in English, I didn’t want to learn English any more, and I didn't want to communicate with others in English. But my mother encouraged me. She made me face up to my mistakes and learn from my mistakes. She also taught me some ways to overcome my nervousness. With my mother’s encouragement, I finally won the championship in the later competition.
Without my mother, I wouldn’t have stood up again and won the championship. I love my mother because she is the best mom in the world. Thank you mum!
【详解】
1. 题干解读：文章是一篇话题作文。首先要把作文题目补充完整，然后以题目为主线，展开描写。可以通过描写自己的亲身经历，衬托出要对妈妈说的这句话，重点是要把事情描写清楚。
2. 例文点评：短文分三段描写，采用总分总的结构描写。第一段总的提出了我爱我的妈妈；第二段具体的描写一件事情，衬托出妈妈对我的关爱和帮助；第三段再次总结我爱我的妈妈。整个文章结构完整，思路清晰，语言表达清楚流畅，意思明确通顺。
3. 高分亮点：
短语：grow up；take part in；as a result；not …any more；face up；learn from。
句型：when引导的时间状语从句；so … that 引导的结果状语从句；because引导的原因状语从句；and引导的并列句。
