Unit 6 Caring for your health Lesson5 Writing课件(共38张PPT)

(共38张PPT)
Unit 6 Caring for your health
Lesson 5 Writing
3.运用表示关心、建议和祝愿的表达方法。
4.使用“蛛网图”列写作要点并根据写作步骤完成邮件和修改。
2.列出“慰问建议类邮件”的格式及内容要素。
1. 认读和理解单词：recovery。
By the end of the lesson , I hope we can:
学习目标
Pre-writing
1
An email to a sick classmate
Mary’s problem
What’s wrong with Mandy
What does Mary want to do
She is sick.
She wants to write an email to Mandy.
Get the format
A
( P92 A )
Get the format
Receiver’s name
Sender’s name
Greeting
Body
Closing
Thanks/Best wishes,
Sender’s name
P92 A Jim has written an email to his classmate Andy in hospital.
①
⑥
⑤
④
③
②
Get the outline
Learn useful expressions
B
Get the outline (body)
Useful Expressions
How to show your concern:
I’m so sorry to hear that …
That sounds terrible!
I’m so upset to hear that …
I couldn’t believe that!
What happened to Andy
How does Jim feel about it
Cause of illness
show concern
The problems he/she faces
Get the outline (body)
What is the problem that Andy faces
Cause of illness
show concern
+
Things we can do for him/her
Get the outline (body)
What will Jim do for Andy
The problems he/she faces
Cause of illness
show concern
Suggestions for him/her
+
Get the outline (body)
What does Jim advise Andy to do
Useful Expressions
How to give suggestions:
It is good/ wise to do…
+
Things we can do for him/her
The problems he/she faces
Cause of illness
show concern
How to give suggestions:
You should/can do...
You had better do...
Remember to do...
Why not do...
Why don’t you do…
What/How about doing...
It is important for sb. to do…
Doing sth. is…
Useful Expressions
Express wishes
Get the outline (body)
return to a normal state of health
[r k v ri]
Useful Expressions
How to express wishes
I wish you all the best for a rapid recovery.
I hope you’ll get well soon.
I hope you will get over it soon.
Suggestions for him/her
+
+
Things we can do for him/her
The problems he/she faces
Cause of illness
show concern
n. 恢复
While-writing
2
Let’s finish Mary’s email to Mandy together!
the senior high school entrance examination
Mary’s classmate Mandy is going to take . But recently, she found that she suffered from the of it . She could not sleep well at night and often felt nervous in the daytime. A few days ago, She fell asleep in class and . The doctor told her to stay at home for several days.
Mary wants to write an email to her .
Writing task:
a headache
a stomach ache
a toothache
a cold
a fever
a sore throat
Mandy
Speaking
stress
had a cold
Mary and Mandy
Let’s finish Mary’s email together!
Analyze (审）
人称:
时态：
2. Organize (构）
格式:
段落:
3. List (列）
提纲和要点
Writing steps:
The first and second person
Depend on the time of the action
6 parts
3 paragraphs
List（列）
The problems Mandy faces
Suggestions for Mandy
Express wishes
Mary’s email
to Mandy
1.Suffered from the stress of the senior high school entrance examination.
2.Had a cold.
1.Guard against the stress:
2.Prevent a cold：
Reading
Be positive
Learn to relax
Take up a hobby
Take care of your body
Laugh
Paragraph 1
Paragraph 2
Paragraph 2
Paragraph 2
Paragraph 3
1. .
2. .
3. .
…
1. .
2. .
3. .
…
1) .
2) .
. …
5 minutes to finish the left parts
Things Mary
can do for Mandy
Cause of illness
Show concern
Mary’s email
1. Analyze (审）
2. Organize (构）
3. List (列）
4. Connect (连）
过渡词、句、段等
5. Polish (润）
6. Check (查）
人称 时态 格式 要点
错误（语法、拼写、标点符号等等）
Writing steps:
15 minutes to finish the Email
Mary’s classmate Mandy is going to take the senior high school entrance examination. But recently, she found that she suffered from the stress of it . She could not sleep well at night and often felt nervous in the daytime. This morning, She fell asleep in class and had a cold. The doctor told her to stay at home for several days.
Mary wants to write an email to her .
Post-writing
3
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Checklist
A sample from my student
1
2
3
4
5
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mary
Mandy
Evaluation chart
检查项目 Good Okay Poor
Content 内容 邮件格式
5个内容要点
Language 语言 语法错误
拼写错误
标点错误
句式多样性
Coherence 连贯性 连贯得体
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Checklist
Grammar mistake
had
lend
and
to
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Mary
Evaluation chart
检查项目 Good Okay Poor
Content 内容 邮件格式
5个内容要点
Language 语言 语法错误
拼写错误
标点错误
句式多样性
Coherence 连贯性 连贯得体
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Checklist
Spelling mistake
several
Remember
pressure
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Evaluation chart
检查项目 Good Okay Poor
Content 内容 邮件格式
5个内容要点
Language 语言 语法错误
拼写错误
标点错误
句式多样性
Coherence 连贯性 连贯得体
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Checklist
Punctuation mistake
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Mary
Evaluation chart
检查项目 Good Okay Poor
Content 内容 邮件格式
5个内容要点
Language 语言 语法错误
拼写错误
标点错误
句式多样性
Coherence 连贯性 连贯得体
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Checklist
Varied sentence patterns
It’s important to
You had better
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Evaluation chart
检查项目 Good Okay Poor
Content 内容 邮件格式
5个内容要点
Language 语言 语法错误
拼写错误
标点错误
句式多样性
Coherence 连贯性 连贯得体
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Checklist
Transitional words/phrases/sentences
because
Firstly,…
Secondly,…
Besides,…
There are still some ways to overcome it.
2
3
1
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you have a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for sevel days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lent my notebook to you help you with your studies when you return. Remenber to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think. Most of us suffer from it . You should be positive. You should learn relax. You should sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much presure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
Evaluation chart
检查项目 Good Okay Poor
Content 内容 邮件格式
5个内容要点
Language 语言 语法错误
拼写错误
标点错误
句式多样性
Coherence 连贯性 连贯得体
More writing skills
原句：You should be positive.
表达观点技巧：
Topic sentences
+
Supporting details
（解释或者举例）
原句：It’s important to learn to relax.
Add explanation:(添加解释)
Add examples:(添加例子)
改后：You should be positive and believe that your life is always full of hope.
改后：It's important to learn to relax. For example, you can take a walk, listen to music or watch a film.
Reading
Mary
Dear Mandy,
I’m so upset to hear that you had a cold. Do you feel better now
I’m afraid that you will have a hard time staying at home for several days. You must be worried about your school work . I can lend my notebook to you and help you with your studies when you return. Remember to drink more water and keep warm. As for the stress, it is not as terrible as you think because most of us suffer from it . There are still some ways to overcome it. Firstly, you should be positive and believe that your life is always full of hope. Secondly, It's important to learn to relax. For example, you can take a walk, listen to music or watch a film. Besides, you had better sleep enough. In a word, don't put too much pressure on yourself.
I wish you all the best for a quick recovery.
Cheers,
Mary
Mandy
modified version
Summary
4
What makes a good email to a sick classmate
Receiver’s name
Sender’s name
Greeting
Body
Closing
Sender’s name
Right format
Good content
Cause of illness
Show your concern
The problems he/she faces
Suggestions for him/her
Things you can do for him/her
Express wishes


Proper language
Varied sentence patterns
Coherence
Add supporting details
No mistakes
多样的句式
增加细节
无错误
连贯性
Homework
5
1.Revise and improve your email using the evaluation chart.
2.Exchange your email with your classmate and evaluate it.
Thank you！