2024届高考英语读后续写训练1（freshman campus tour）学案（含答案）
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| 名称 | 2024届高考英语读后续写训练1（freshman campus tour）学案（含答案） |  | |
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| 科目 | 英语 | ||
| 更新时间 | 2023-10-01 15:57:16 | ||
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2024届高考英语读后续写训练1（Campus Freshmen Tour）
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
“Now, parents and students separate into two groups. You will be reunited at the end of the campus tour. ”
Groups of incoming freshmen happily left their parents upon hearing this announcement. I was less than thrilled about starting college, let alone leaving my mother's side to tour the campus with other freshmen；I felt a little anxious.
We followed the senior tour guide. The other freshmen chatted and made casual introductions as I dragged behind. How could I have believed I was ready for this ？ After all, it had only been a few months since I left the hospital. I was feeling better for the first time in years. But college. . . ？
My thinking was interrupted by a sweet female voice, "Hi, I'm Jennifer. " "I'm Lauren, "I replied. "Where do you prefer to live？ At home or on campus？ "she smiled. "I'm not sure, "I said. "You should live on campus！It will be a lot of fun！ "she said. Before I could reply, the tour guide announced it was time to create our schedules and select the courses we wanted to take.
We crowded into the Student Activity Center. Three seniors handed out thick course bulletins（课程公告）and forms that needed to be filled out. All around me, the sounds of turning papers and writing sounded like those given by an alarm clock. Others seemed to be moving through the process quickly but I hadn't even opened my course catalog.
"Focus, "I told myself. "Just read through the catalog and find the courses you like and a schedule that works. "Psychology A or B, Geology 101, English, History, sections 1, 2, 3. . . The list went on and on.
I panicked and almost started to cry. How was I supposed to know how to complete it？I was just relearning how to live in the real world, and they wanted me to make a schedule. How I wished someone could help me.
注意： 1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右；
2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
(
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder.
)
Campus Freshmen Tour
Review of the original story:
1. Theme:
2. Setting:
3. Character (major & minor)
4. Plots & Emotion
I other freshmen
5. Foreshadowing: (should be related to _________________________________)
1)
2)
3)
4)
6. Analysis of given sentences
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder.
Paragraph 1:
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. Many of them rushed out to meet their parents. I couldn’t breathe and was feeling anxious. My head was pounding. Moments later, I was crying. And several students started to stare at me. One of the seniors in charge walked over to my table. “What’s the matter ” she asked impatiently. “I... I can’t do this!” I said. “All you have to do is make your schedule, just like everybody else,” she said, clearly annoyed.
Paragraph 2:
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. I looked back and found Jennifer standing behind me. “Everything is alright,” she told the senior. “I’ll help her.” The senior walked away. “What’s wrong, sweetie ” Jennifer asked. Hearing Jennifer’s kind words, I cried even harder, saying, “It’s just too much!” Then Jennifer put her arm around me and said, “Let me instruct you.” She then guided me through the process step by step until I completed my schedule. Later, when saying goodbye, we made a promise to keep in touch.
【解析】
本篇书面表达是读后续写。通过阅读所给文章可知，本文讲述了作者的大学校园之旅，作者对开始上大学一点也不兴奋，更不用说校园之旅了，作者开始感到焦虑；途中，作者认识了珍妮弗，还没来得及和她说很多话，校园导游宣布开始选课，作者惊慌失措，几乎哭了起来，她很希望有个人能帮助她。
【详解】续写部分分为两段，第一段开头是：很快，其他新生都在交表格，本段应该描述作者反应，作者感到焦虑，不知所措，一位年长的老师过来要求作者交表格，作者没有交出表格，那位老师很生气。第二段开头是：然后，我感到一只温暖的手放在我的肩膀上。本段应该描写詹妮弗帮助作者完成选课，作者和詹妮弗最后成了好友。
续写时要求使用5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语增加了写作难度，我们要熟悉所给划线词语，恰当的时候加以运用。最后还要注意所续写短文的词数应为150左右；续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。按要求完成写作任务。
【点睛】范文内容完整，要点全面，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当，上下文意思连贯，符合逻辑关系。作者在范文中使用了较多高级句型，如：She then guided me through the process step by step until I completed my schedule.这句话运用了until引导的时间状语从句；本文也使用了一些固定词组，如rush out ; stare at; keep in touch等。全文中没有中国式英语的句式，显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外，文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。
学生优秀习作
冯俊*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. But I still didn’t know how to fill in the form. Seeing other freshmen handing in their forms and leaving the Student Activity Center, I seemed to be the only person left in the center. I became more nervous so that I couldn’t write a word in the form. The seniors looked at me angrily because I was wasting their time. “Have you finished If you have, please hand in your form as soon as possible,” said one of the seniors. Hearing this, my face turned red and I lowered my head.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. I turned around and saw a familiar face. It was Jennifer. “Why haven’t you finished your forms,” she asked. “Ah...it’s really difficult for me to do that. I...” I replied in a low voice. “Be relaxed. Just follow your heart to fill the form.” She comforted in a soft voice. After hearing her words, I felt much more relaxed. I finished the form quickly and handed it in to the seniors. Then I left the centre with Jennifer. We were bathed in the sunset. “Tell you a secret,” said Jennifer, “We are in the same class.”At that moment, I knew that I would have a colorful campus life.
罗新*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. I could still do nothing but to stare at the catalog. My hands were shaking and my sweat was pouring on my face. “Relax and read,” what doctors told me repeated in my brain, but the sounds all around me made it impossible for me to focus. The more empty the centre was, the more anxious I felt. Finally, nearly all of them were gone and I managed to pick up the pen. But I was still too nervous to write even a letter. I closed my eyes in pain and moaned, “Can anyone help me ”
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong, Lauren ...Oh! Are you sick ” Seeing my pale face, Jennifer was shocked and asked me worriedly. “I’m fine. I just can’t focus on the paper,” I replied sadly. “Oh, that’s not a big deal. Let me help you.” She then sat beside me and began to ask me questions. With her sweet voice, I collected myself and filled up the form. When I walked out of the centre with her, I didn’t even notice that there was a smile on my face. When I expressed my
gratitude to her, she said, “It’s fine. I’m also happy that I have helped you.” With her help, I became less anxious but more confident. I believed that I could live in the campus by myself and had a wonderful college life.
唐文*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms.“Finish the form as quickly as possible, and we still have other places to visit.” The sound of the senior tour guide arose like a sentence of my death. Looking at my blank paper, my hand was trembling heavily and my clothes were extremely wet. I swore I had tried my best to write something on it, but the more nervous I was, the fewer words I could remember in my mind. As time went by, the freshmen handed in their forms one after another. However, my pen was still focused on the first line reading, “The course you select is:.....” I couldn’t hold my tear any more and started crying.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “What’s up, Lauren ” The voice was familiar and sweet, and I raised my head up and saw Jennifer’s face. “I...I don’t know. I just can’t finish the form.” I replied in a low voice, “I have just recovered from a mental illness, so I can’t focus myself.” After hearing this, Jennifer smiled to me and said, “Don’t worry. I will help you finish your schedule. You tell me what you want to choose, and I will write for you.” I took a deep breath to calm myself down.
With the help of her, I quickly finished the form and handed it in. “Thank you for your kindness.” On our way to the domitory, I gave my thanks to her. “You’re welcome. Let’s be friends,” she replied sweetly.
吴昱*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. But my form was entirely empty! I tried to fill in some blankets but failed. Breathing heavily, I looked at the catalog once again to search for the courses I wanted to take. “Where have I gone ” I wondered. However, the more I tried to focus on the catalog, the more my mind were stunned. I could feel that others were looking at me. Their eyes were sharp as if they were arrows shooting through my body. I didn’t dare to make eye contact with them and was extremely embarrassed. At that moment, my mind was almost frozen.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “Are you ok It seems that you have some troubles,” Jennifer asked. It was her words that pulled my mind back to reality. “I...I’m not well,” I admitted, “I have no idea what courses to take.” “You may take biology with me if you want,” she smiled.” “Sure, biology,” I replied and filled “Biology” at where she pointed. I used to watch documentary films about animals when I was in hospital, so biology might be a good choice. With Jennifer’s help, I gradually filled in the form and there was the last blanket, “Where to live”. Having thought carefully, I filled in “Campus” and handed in my form. I believed I was ready and I had made my first friend in the campus of my college, Jennifer.
张梓*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. They continued their communication and got familiar with each other soon, leaving me alone still reading through the catalog and not making a choice. Their voice and laugh covered the sounds of turning papers and writing, which made me sad and helpless. I went out of the Student Activity Centre to find a quiet place to calm myself down. However, I still didn’t know how to complete it. I couldn’t control myself and my tear rolled out. I was upset and begged for someone who could help me. ....
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. Holding me tightly, Jennifer s aid, “We are looking for you. Let’s come back!” “But I haven’t completed my course bulletins and forms. I’m so useless that I don’t know what to do.” I replied in a trembling voice. “Don’t worry. I’ll help you,” said Jennifer. She gave me many suggestions and I decided to choose English which we like in common. When I came back, everyone came to chat with me and with Jennifer’s help, I got along well with the other freshmen and made friends with them. I soon adapted to the campus life and enjoyed the happy time in the college.
何佳*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. On the contrary, I hadn’t filled even one course in my form. Feeling extremely anxious and lonely, my body started to tremble, feeling guilty for my uselessness without the help of my parents. “I’m not ready for this.” I told myself, drowning in the bad and unbearable memory of the life in hospital. A doctor said that I had trouble in dealing with social relationship and solving problems some months ago and I moved into the hospital from then on, in which I accepted boring and painful medical treatments day by day. Thinking of all this, I guessed I was at the edge of collapse.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. No sooner had I let out a big cry than I heard a mild voice comforting, “Don’t worry about it. I will help you.” I turned back and saw Jennifer with her warm and sweet smile on her face, melting the ice in my heart. “Jennifer... ” “Why ” I asked. “I don’t know what you’ve been through but I think at least I can be of a little help for you at this new beginning. Campus should be filled with joy and fun instead of tears, right ” said Jennifer. “Yes. I guess I’ve got ready for the college life! Thank you, Jennifer.” Then , I filled in my form by myself and shared my new friend and our warm experience with my mum at the end of the tour.
潘晟*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. Many of them rushed out happily to meet their parents when I just held my breath and felt anxious. I had no idea what I was going to do when facing so many courses and schedules now. Moments later, I started crying. And several students began to watch me with a terrible look. One of the students looked at me and asked, “Hey, what’s the matter ” The impatient voice made me panicked and I replied, “ I...I.... I can’t handle it.” He rolled his eyes at me and said, “All you have to do is to make your schedule like everybody else.” Hearing the words, I still had no idea.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. I looked back and found a beautiful girl standing right behind me. It was Jennifer. “It gonna be all right, ” she told the other students, “I will help her.” Then the other students walked away. “What’s wrong Lauren.” Jennifer asked. Hearing the sweet voice and kind words, I stopped crying and said, “It’s just too much and I had no idea what to do.” Then Jennifer put her arm around me and said, “Don’t be upset. Let me give you some instructions.” She then guided me to learn about the courses and forms step by step until I finished my schedule completely. At last, we made a promise to keep in touch.
于苏*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. With a bland mind, I looked through the crowd who were all thrilled and pleased to live a good academic year. I was like on an isolated isolated surrounded by fierce beasts with nothing for survival. With my brow down, my heart cried, “Help! Help!... That’s enough. I’m not going to college.... But what about my mother. I’m responsible for her bringing me up.” I tried to calm down and select something but my mind always drove me to something simple but I was not interested in. “Look！You’ve lost your interest and passion . You are done!” I said to myself.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. It was Jennifer. She handed me a piece of apple pie and said, “How are you going Your face looks pale. Please take this one and we should go to the clinic.” “I’m fine.” I told Jennifer all my experiences with a sense of relief and warmth. “ Always smile at the sun, the moon and the stars. Treat yourself with love and let go of pressure. I made the apple pie on my own and I was priviledged to learn how to make an apple pie.” With some emotions growing out of my dried up mind, I said, “Learning is so wonderful. Life is brilliant. I will love myself forever. Thank you for your lifting words.” Then I concentrated myself on finding the courses and finishing the schedule. Eventually, I handed in my form, too. After reuniting with my mother, I started my wonderful college life from then on with Jennifer, my new friend.
郑*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. However, I still didn’t know how to write. Being absent for so long, I couldn’t even figure out which subject I liked. The more forms were handed it, the more anxious I was. “Come on, Lauren. It was just a piece of cake for you，”I tried to cheer myself up, but it was merely in vain. I was just like an ant on a hot pot, knowing nothing to do. With my stomach in knots, I held my head into my arms, bursting into tears. “I want to go home,” whispered I in a low voice.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong with you It seems that you have met with some problems.” I could hear a sweet voice. No sooner had I held my head up than I wiped my tears off. I was Jennifer. “Tell me what has happened and I can help you,” smiled Jennifer. So embarrassed was I that my face immediately turned red. “I...I can’t complete the schedule.” I told her my dilemma. “Oh, I see. I’ll choose something suitable for you,” she nodded her head. With her help, I finished my schedule quickly and we handed in the form together. I expressed my heartfelt gratitude to her. She smiled and said, “That’s fine. We’re good friends, aren’t we ” Hearing this, I smiled and was sure that my campus life would be absolutely colorful with the companion of Jennifer.
邹郁*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. I heard two girls discussing their choices. “I filled ‘History’ in the blanket. What about you ” “Umm, I think the ‘News Report’ is also quite good.” Many other freshmen communicated with each other too. The more active their discussions were, the more paniced I was. It seemed like hundreds of bees were making noise around my
head and the only thing I could do was to focus on my form. Owing to the long time experience of being in hospital, I couldn’t fit in the crowded campus life. What’s worse, the senior began to urge. Feeling hopeless, I just wanted my mother staying with me, or perhaps someone could come and help me.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. Holding back my tears while turning around, I saw the freshman called Jennifer show up in front of me. “It seems that you’re hesitating with your courses, Lauren,” she asked me with caring smile hanging on her face. “Well, I can’t make a decision...” I replied with tears dropping. Jennifer mildly tapped my back and asked me for the reason in confuse. Moved by her kindness, I stated my experience in the hospital. “That’s Ok. Let me help you to look up your favourite course.” With her help, I chose “Geology 101”, which aroused my attraction. “Thank you for your kind help. It was you that called me back from my fear.,” I said. She grabbed my hand and then said, “You are so welcome, my friend.”
Good Expressions:
Paragraph 1
3班徐佳*：Then, the tour guide announced again that it was time to hand in the forms and visit the dormitory to decide where to live. Hearing the announcement, freshmen around me seemed very excited and followed the guide rushing out the center, leaving me alone with a blank form.
3班林芷*：But I haven’t even selected a single course. What should I do “Come on,” I told myself, “I need to choose a schedule.” Then, I went over the catalog again and again. But the effort only left me more anxious.
3班罗会*：A flush of anxiety came up on me. How could I believe that I was ready for the campus life How could I begin the freshman life with a blank form
3班孔羽*：“What should I choose History Psychology ” I whispered to myself. I was so panicked that I wandered aimlessly.
3班伍永*：But I was still sitting there, turning over the course catalog over and over again, with my form filled with nothing. … Feeling helpless and hopeless, I couldn’t help bursting into tears.
3班徐珊*：Nervous and panicked as I was, I tried to pillow my head on my arms in order not to be noticed by other freshmen.
9班江奉*：Watching more and more freshmen leaving the hall, I grew pale and my hands were trembling. “I don’t want to look strange. I don’t know what to do.” Many thoughts crowded in my mind.
10班姚梓*：They seemed very relaxed and happy, which made me feel more nervous.
1班冯俊*：Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. But I still didn’t know how to fill in the form. Seeing other freshmen handing in their forms and leaving the Student Activity Center, I seemed to be the only person left in the center. I became more nervous so that I couldn’t write a word in the form. The seniors looked at me angrily because I was wasting their time. “Have you finished If you have, please hand in your form as soon as possible,” said one of the seniors. Hearing this, my face turned red and I lowered my head.
Paragraph 2
3班黄凯*：Oh, it was Jennifer. “Why do you sit here alone ”, she asked. “I… I don’t know how to select the courses and fill in the form”. I replied hesitantly.
3班黄漪*：It was Jennifer. “Do you have any trouble in selecting courses ” she asked. “Umm… Yes”, I replied in a low voice. “Well, let’s put it in this way”, she sat beside me and said, “Which interests you most Psychology, history or Geology ” “Maybe psychology.” She helped me complete the form bit by bit. With her kind help, I handed in the form and had a great time in the campus tour.
9班董靖*：Jennifer sat beside me and guided me to select the course. “Making the schedule is easy. Think about your interests and you can list them on the paper …” Finally, I did it.
优秀习作：
1班罗新*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. I could still do nothing but to stare at the catalog. My hands were shaking and my sweat was pouring on my face. “Relax and read,” what doctors told me repeated in my brain, but the sounds all around me made it impossible for me to focus. The more empty the centre was, the more anxious I felt. Finally, nearly all of them were gone and I managed to pick up the pen. But I was still too nervous to write even a letter. I closed my eyes in pain and moaned, “Can anyone help me ”
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong, Lauren ...Oh! Are you sick ” Seeing my pale face, Jennifer was shocked and asked me worriedly. “I’m fine. I just can’t focus on the paper,” I replied sadly. “Oh, that’s not a big deal. Let me help you.” She then sat beside me and began to ask me questions. With her sweet voice, I collected myself and filled up the form. When I walked out of the centre with her, I didn’t even notice that there was a smile on my face. When I expressed my gratitude to her, she said, “It’s fine. I’m also happy to help you.” With her help, I became less anxious but more confident. I believed that I could live in the campus by myself and had a wonderful college life.
1班邹郁*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. I heard two girls discussing their choices. “I filled ‘History’ in the blanket. What about you ” “Umm, I think the ‘News Report’ is also quite good.” Many other freshmen communicated with each other too. The more active their discussions were; the more panicked I was. It seemed like hundreds of bees making noise around my head and the only thing I could do was to focus on my form. Owing to the long experience in hospital, I couldn’t fit in to the crowded campus life. What’s worse, the senior began to urge. Feeling hopeless, I just wanted my mother staying with me, or perhaps someone could come and help me.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. Holding back my tears while turning around, I saw Jennifer in front of me. “It seems that you’re hesitating with your courses, Lauren,” she asked me with caring smile hanging on her face. “Well, I can’t make a decision...” I replied with tears dropping. Jennifer mildly tapped my back and asked me for the reason. Moved by her kindness, I stated my experience in the hospital. “That’s Ok. Let me help you to look up your favourite course.” With her help, I chose “Geology 101”, which aroused my attraction. “Thank you for your kind help. It was you that called me back from my fear”, I said. She grabbed my hand and then said, “You are welcome, my friend.”
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
“Now, parents and students separate into two groups. You will be reunited at the end of the campus tour. ”
Groups of incoming freshmen happily left their parents upon hearing this announcement. I was less than thrilled about starting college, let alone leaving my mother's side to tour the campus with other freshmen；I felt a little anxious.
We followed the senior tour guide. The other freshmen chatted and made casual introductions as I dragged behind. How could I have believed I was ready for this ？ After all, it had only been a few months since I left the hospital. I was feeling better for the first time in years. But college. . . ？
My thinking was interrupted by a sweet female voice, "Hi, I'm Jennifer. " "I'm Lauren, "I replied. "Where do you prefer to live？ At home or on campus？ "she smiled. "I'm not sure, "I said. "You should live on campus！It will be a lot of fun！ "she said. Before I could reply, the tour guide announced it was time to create our schedules and select the courses we wanted to take.
We crowded into the Student Activity Center. Three seniors handed out thick course bulletins（课程公告）and forms that needed to be filled out. All around me, the sounds of turning papers and writing sounded like those given by an alarm clock. Others seemed to be moving through the process quickly but I hadn't even opened my course catalog.
"Focus, "I told myself. "Just read through the catalog and find the courses you like and a schedule that works. "Psychology A or B, Geology 101, English, History, sections 1, 2, 3. . . The list went on and on.
I panicked and almost started to cry. How was I supposed to know how to complete it？I was just relearning how to live in the real world, and they wanted me to make a schedule. How I wished someone could help me.
注意： 1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右；
2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
(
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder.
)
Campus Freshmen Tour
Review of the original story:
1. Theme:
2. Setting:
3. Character (major & minor)
4. Plots & Emotion
I other freshmen
5. Foreshadowing: (should be related to _________________________________)
1)
2)
3)
4)
6. Analysis of given sentences
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder.
Paragraph 1:
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. Many of them rushed out to meet their parents. I couldn’t breathe and was feeling anxious. My head was pounding. Moments later, I was crying. And several students started to stare at me. One of the seniors in charge walked over to my table. “What’s the matter ” she asked impatiently. “I... I can’t do this!” I said. “All you have to do is make your schedule, just like everybody else,” she said, clearly annoyed.
Paragraph 2:
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. I looked back and found Jennifer standing behind me. “Everything is alright,” she told the senior. “I’ll help her.” The senior walked away. “What’s wrong, sweetie ” Jennifer asked. Hearing Jennifer’s kind words, I cried even harder, saying, “It’s just too much!” Then Jennifer put her arm around me and said, “Let me instruct you.” She then guided me through the process step by step until I completed my schedule. Later, when saying goodbye, we made a promise to keep in touch.
【解析】
本篇书面表达是读后续写。通过阅读所给文章可知，本文讲述了作者的大学校园之旅，作者对开始上大学一点也不兴奋，更不用说校园之旅了，作者开始感到焦虑；途中，作者认识了珍妮弗，还没来得及和她说很多话，校园导游宣布开始选课，作者惊慌失措，几乎哭了起来，她很希望有个人能帮助她。
【详解】续写部分分为两段，第一段开头是：很快，其他新生都在交表格，本段应该描述作者反应，作者感到焦虑，不知所措，一位年长的老师过来要求作者交表格，作者没有交出表格，那位老师很生气。第二段开头是：然后，我感到一只温暖的手放在我的肩膀上。本段应该描写詹妮弗帮助作者完成选课，作者和詹妮弗最后成了好友。
续写时要求使用5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语增加了写作难度，我们要熟悉所给划线词语，恰当的时候加以运用。最后还要注意所续写短文的词数应为150左右；续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。按要求完成写作任务。
【点睛】范文内容完整，要点全面，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当，上下文意思连贯，符合逻辑关系。作者在范文中使用了较多高级句型，如：She then guided me through the process step by step until I completed my schedule.这句话运用了until引导的时间状语从句；本文也使用了一些固定词组，如rush out ; stare at; keep in touch等。全文中没有中国式英语的句式，显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外，文章思路清晰、层次分明，上下句转换自然，为文章增色添彩。
学生优秀习作
冯俊*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. But I still didn’t know how to fill in the form. Seeing other freshmen handing in their forms and leaving the Student Activity Center, I seemed to be the only person left in the center. I became more nervous so that I couldn’t write a word in the form. The seniors looked at me angrily because I was wasting their time. “Have you finished If you have, please hand in your form as soon as possible,” said one of the seniors. Hearing this, my face turned red and I lowered my head.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. I turned around and saw a familiar face. It was Jennifer. “Why haven’t you finished your forms,” she asked. “Ah...it’s really difficult for me to do that. I...” I replied in a low voice. “Be relaxed. Just follow your heart to fill the form.” She comforted in a soft voice. After hearing her words, I felt much more relaxed. I finished the form quickly and handed it in to the seniors. Then I left the centre with Jennifer. We were bathed in the sunset. “Tell you a secret,” said Jennifer, “We are in the same class.”At that moment, I knew that I would have a colorful campus life.
罗新*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. I could still do nothing but to stare at the catalog. My hands were shaking and my sweat was pouring on my face. “Relax and read,” what doctors told me repeated in my brain, but the sounds all around me made it impossible for me to focus. The more empty the centre was, the more anxious I felt. Finally, nearly all of them were gone and I managed to pick up the pen. But I was still too nervous to write even a letter. I closed my eyes in pain and moaned, “Can anyone help me ”
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong, Lauren ...Oh! Are you sick ” Seeing my pale face, Jennifer was shocked and asked me worriedly. “I’m fine. I just can’t focus on the paper,” I replied sadly. “Oh, that’s not a big deal. Let me help you.” She then sat beside me and began to ask me questions. With her sweet voice, I collected myself and filled up the form. When I walked out of the centre with her, I didn’t even notice that there was a smile on my face. When I expressed my
gratitude to her, she said, “It’s fine. I’m also happy that I have helped you.” With her help, I became less anxious but more confident. I believed that I could live in the campus by myself and had a wonderful college life.
唐文*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms.“Finish the form as quickly as possible, and we still have other places to visit.” The sound of the senior tour guide arose like a sentence of my death. Looking at my blank paper, my hand was trembling heavily and my clothes were extremely wet. I swore I had tried my best to write something on it, but the more nervous I was, the fewer words I could remember in my mind. As time went by, the freshmen handed in their forms one after another. However, my pen was still focused on the first line reading, “The course you select is:.....” I couldn’t hold my tear any more and started crying.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “What’s up, Lauren ” The voice was familiar and sweet, and I raised my head up and saw Jennifer’s face. “I...I don’t know. I just can’t finish the form.” I replied in a low voice, “I have just recovered from a mental illness, so I can’t focus myself.” After hearing this, Jennifer smiled to me and said, “Don’t worry. I will help you finish your schedule. You tell me what you want to choose, and I will write for you.” I took a deep breath to calm myself down.
With the help of her, I quickly finished the form and handed it in. “Thank you for your kindness.” On our way to the domitory, I gave my thanks to her. “You’re welcome. Let’s be friends,” she replied sweetly.
吴昱*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. But my form was entirely empty! I tried to fill in some blankets but failed. Breathing heavily, I looked at the catalog once again to search for the courses I wanted to take. “Where have I gone ” I wondered. However, the more I tried to focus on the catalog, the more my mind were stunned. I could feel that others were looking at me. Their eyes were sharp as if they were arrows shooting through my body. I didn’t dare to make eye contact with them and was extremely embarrassed. At that moment, my mind was almost frozen.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “Are you ok It seems that you have some troubles,” Jennifer asked. It was her words that pulled my mind back to reality. “I...I’m not well,” I admitted, “I have no idea what courses to take.” “You may take biology with me if you want,” she smiled.” “Sure, biology,” I replied and filled “Biology” at where she pointed. I used to watch documentary films about animals when I was in hospital, so biology might be a good choice. With Jennifer’s help, I gradually filled in the form and there was the last blanket, “Where to live”. Having thought carefully, I filled in “Campus” and handed in my form. I believed I was ready and I had made my first friend in the campus of my college, Jennifer.
张梓*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. They continued their communication and got familiar with each other soon, leaving me alone still reading through the catalog and not making a choice. Their voice and laugh covered the sounds of turning papers and writing, which made me sad and helpless. I went out of the Student Activity Centre to find a quiet place to calm myself down. However, I still didn’t know how to complete it. I couldn’t control myself and my tear rolled out. I was upset and begged for someone who could help me. ....
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. Holding me tightly, Jennifer s aid, “We are looking for you. Let’s come back!” “But I haven’t completed my course bulletins and forms. I’m so useless that I don’t know what to do.” I replied in a trembling voice. “Don’t worry. I’ll help you,” said Jennifer. She gave me many suggestions and I decided to choose English which we like in common. When I came back, everyone came to chat with me and with Jennifer’s help, I got along well with the other freshmen and made friends with them. I soon adapted to the campus life and enjoyed the happy time in the college.
何佳*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. On the contrary, I hadn’t filled even one course in my form. Feeling extremely anxious and lonely, my body started to tremble, feeling guilty for my uselessness without the help of my parents. “I’m not ready for this.” I told myself, drowning in the bad and unbearable memory of the life in hospital. A doctor said that I had trouble in dealing with social relationship and solving problems some months ago and I moved into the hospital from then on, in which I accepted boring and painful medical treatments day by day. Thinking of all this, I guessed I was at the edge of collapse.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. No sooner had I let out a big cry than I heard a mild voice comforting, “Don’t worry about it. I will help you.” I turned back and saw Jennifer with her warm and sweet smile on her face, melting the ice in my heart. “Jennifer... ” “Why ” I asked. “I don’t know what you’ve been through but I think at least I can be of a little help for you at this new beginning. Campus should be filled with joy and fun instead of tears, right ” said Jennifer. “Yes. I guess I’ve got ready for the college life! Thank you, Jennifer.” Then , I filled in my form by myself and shared my new friend and our warm experience with my mum at the end of the tour.
潘晟*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. Many of them rushed out happily to meet their parents when I just held my breath and felt anxious. I had no idea what I was going to do when facing so many courses and schedules now. Moments later, I started crying. And several students began to watch me with a terrible look. One of the students looked at me and asked, “Hey, what’s the matter ” The impatient voice made me panicked and I replied, “ I...I.... I can’t handle it.” He rolled his eyes at me and said, “All you have to do is to make your schedule like everybody else.” Hearing the words, I still had no idea.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. I looked back and found a beautiful girl standing right behind me. It was Jennifer. “It gonna be all right, ” she told the other students, “I will help her.” Then the other students walked away. “What’s wrong Lauren.” Jennifer asked. Hearing the sweet voice and kind words, I stopped crying and said, “It’s just too much and I had no idea what to do.” Then Jennifer put her arm around me and said, “Don’t be upset. Let me give you some instructions.” She then guided me to learn about the courses and forms step by step until I finished my schedule completely. At last, we made a promise to keep in touch.
于苏*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. With a bland mind, I looked through the crowd who were all thrilled and pleased to live a good academic year. I was like on an isolated isolated surrounded by fierce beasts with nothing for survival. With my brow down, my heart cried, “Help! Help!... That’s enough. I’m not going to college.... But what about my mother. I’m responsible for her bringing me up.” I tried to calm down and select something but my mind always drove me to something simple but I was not interested in. “Look！You’ve lost your interest and passion . You are done!” I said to myself.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. It was Jennifer. She handed me a piece of apple pie and said, “How are you going Your face looks pale. Please take this one and we should go to the clinic.” “I’m fine.” I told Jennifer all my experiences with a sense of relief and warmth. “ Always smile at the sun, the moon and the stars. Treat yourself with love and let go of pressure. I made the apple pie on my own and I was priviledged to learn how to make an apple pie.” With some emotions growing out of my dried up mind, I said, “Learning is so wonderful. Life is brilliant. I will love myself forever. Thank you for your lifting words.” Then I concentrated myself on finding the courses and finishing the schedule. Eventually, I handed in my form, too. After reuniting with my mother, I started my wonderful college life from then on with Jennifer, my new friend.
郑*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. However, I still didn’t know how to write. Being absent for so long, I couldn’t even figure out which subject I liked. The more forms were handed it, the more anxious I was. “Come on, Lauren. It was just a piece of cake for you，”I tried to cheer myself up, but it was merely in vain. I was just like an ant on a hot pot, knowing nothing to do. With my stomach in knots, I held my head into my arms, bursting into tears. “I want to go home,” whispered I in a low voice.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong with you It seems that you have met with some problems.” I could hear a sweet voice. No sooner had I held my head up than I wiped my tears off. I was Jennifer. “Tell me what has happened and I can help you,” smiled Jennifer. So embarrassed was I that my face immediately turned red. “I...I can’t complete the schedule.” I told her my dilemma. “Oh, I see. I’ll choose something suitable for you,” she nodded her head. With her help, I finished my schedule quickly and we handed in the form together. I expressed my heartfelt gratitude to her. She smiled and said, “That’s fine. We’re good friends, aren’t we ” Hearing this, I smiled and was sure that my campus life would be absolutely colorful with the companion of Jennifer.
邹郁*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. I heard two girls discussing their choices. “I filled ‘History’ in the blanket. What about you ” “Umm, I think the ‘News Report’ is also quite good.” Many other freshmen communicated with each other too. The more active their discussions were, the more paniced I was. It seemed like hundreds of bees were making noise around my
head and the only thing I could do was to focus on my form. Owing to the long time experience of being in hospital, I couldn’t fit in the crowded campus life. What’s worse, the senior began to urge. Feeling hopeless, I just wanted my mother staying with me, or perhaps someone could come and help me.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. Holding back my tears while turning around, I saw the freshman called Jennifer show up in front of me. “It seems that you’re hesitating with your courses, Lauren,” she asked me with caring smile hanging on her face. “Well, I can’t make a decision...” I replied with tears dropping. Jennifer mildly tapped my back and asked me for the reason in confuse. Moved by her kindness, I stated my experience in the hospital. “That’s Ok. Let me help you to look up your favourite course.” With her help, I chose “Geology 101”, which aroused my attraction. “Thank you for your kind help. It was you that called me back from my fear.,” I said. She grabbed my hand and then said, “You are so welcome, my friend.”
Good Expressions:
Paragraph 1
3班徐佳*：Then, the tour guide announced again that it was time to hand in the forms and visit the dormitory to decide where to live. Hearing the announcement, freshmen around me seemed very excited and followed the guide rushing out the center, leaving me alone with a blank form.
3班林芷*：But I haven’t even selected a single course. What should I do “Come on,” I told myself, “I need to choose a schedule.” Then, I went over the catalog again and again. But the effort only left me more anxious.
3班罗会*：A flush of anxiety came up on me. How could I believe that I was ready for the campus life How could I begin the freshman life with a blank form
3班孔羽*：“What should I choose History Psychology ” I whispered to myself. I was so panicked that I wandered aimlessly.
3班伍永*：But I was still sitting there, turning over the course catalog over and over again, with my form filled with nothing. … Feeling helpless and hopeless, I couldn’t help bursting into tears.
3班徐珊*：Nervous and panicked as I was, I tried to pillow my head on my arms in order not to be noticed by other freshmen.
9班江奉*：Watching more and more freshmen leaving the hall, I grew pale and my hands were trembling. “I don’t want to look strange. I don’t know what to do.” Many thoughts crowded in my mind.
10班姚梓*：They seemed very relaxed and happy, which made me feel more nervous.
1班冯俊*：Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. But I still didn’t know how to fill in the form. Seeing other freshmen handing in their forms and leaving the Student Activity Center, I seemed to be the only person left in the center. I became more nervous so that I couldn’t write a word in the form. The seniors looked at me angrily because I was wasting their time. “Have you finished If you have, please hand in your form as soon as possible,” said one of the seniors. Hearing this, my face turned red and I lowered my head.
Paragraph 2
3班黄凯*：Oh, it was Jennifer. “Why do you sit here alone ”, she asked. “I… I don’t know how to select the courses and fill in the form”. I replied hesitantly.
3班黄漪*：It was Jennifer. “Do you have any trouble in selecting courses ” she asked. “Umm… Yes”, I replied in a low voice. “Well, let’s put it in this way”, she sat beside me and said, “Which interests you most Psychology, history or Geology ” “Maybe psychology.” She helped me complete the form bit by bit. With her kind help, I handed in the form and had a great time in the campus tour.
9班董靖*：Jennifer sat beside me and guided me to select the course. “Making the schedule is easy. Think about your interests and you can list them on the paper …” Finally, I did it.
优秀习作：
1班罗新*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. I could still do nothing but to stare at the catalog. My hands were shaking and my sweat was pouring on my face. “Relax and read,” what doctors told me repeated in my brain, but the sounds all around me made it impossible for me to focus. The more empty the centre was, the more anxious I felt. Finally, nearly all of them were gone and I managed to pick up the pen. But I was still too nervous to write even a letter. I closed my eyes in pain and moaned, “Can anyone help me ”
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong, Lauren ...Oh! Are you sick ” Seeing my pale face, Jennifer was shocked and asked me worriedly. “I’m fine. I just can’t focus on the paper,” I replied sadly. “Oh, that’s not a big deal. Let me help you.” She then sat beside me and began to ask me questions. With her sweet voice, I collected myself and filled up the form. When I walked out of the centre with her, I didn’t even notice that there was a smile on my face. When I expressed my gratitude to her, she said, “It’s fine. I’m also happy to help you.” With her help, I became less anxious but more confident. I believed that I could live in the campus by myself and had a wonderful college life.
1班邹郁*
Soon, other freshmen were handing in their forms. I heard two girls discussing their choices. “I filled ‘History’ in the blanket. What about you ” “Umm, I think the ‘News Report’ is also quite good.” Many other freshmen communicated with each other too. The more active their discussions were; the more panicked I was. It seemed like hundreds of bees making noise around my head and the only thing I could do was to focus on my form. Owing to the long experience in hospital, I couldn’t fit in to the crowded campus life. What’s worse, the senior began to urge. Feeling hopeless, I just wanted my mother staying with me, or perhaps someone could come and help me.
Then, I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. Holding back my tears while turning around, I saw Jennifer in front of me. “It seems that you’re hesitating with your courses, Lauren,” she asked me with caring smile hanging on her face. “Well, I can’t make a decision...” I replied with tears dropping. Jennifer mildly tapped my back and asked me for the reason. Moved by her kindness, I stated my experience in the hospital. “That’s Ok. Let me help you to look up your favourite course.” With her help, I chose “Geology 101”, which aroused my attraction. “Thank you for your kind help. It was you that called me back from my fear”, I said. She grabbed my hand and then said, “You are welcome, my friend.”