(共26张PPT)
后
续
写
读
Continuation writing
《考试
说明》
提供一篇350词以内的材料,要求考生依据材料内容、所给段落开头句续写一篇150词左右的短文。将其发展成一篇与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文。
考查的主要内容包括以下四点:
(1)与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度;
(2)内容的丰富性;
(3)应用语法结构和词汇的丰富性和准确性;
(4)上下文的连贯性
命题要求
档次 描述
第五档(21-25) 漂漂亮亮 无大语法错误,可以有、2-3处拼写或者词形错误 1.创造了丰富、合理的内容,富有逻辑性,续写完整,与原文情境融洽度高。
2.使用了多样且恰当的词汇和语法结构,表达流畅语言错误很少,且完全不影响理解。
3.自然有效地使用了段落间、语句间衔接手段,全文结构清晰,前后呼应,意义连贯。
第四档(16-20) 清清楚楚 2-3处大语法错误 1.创造了比较丰富、合理的内容,比较有逻辑性,续写比较完整,与原文情境融洽度较高。
2.使用了比较多样且恰当的词汇和语法结构,表达比较流畅,有个别错误但不影响理解。
3.比较有效地使用了语句间衔接手段,全文结构比较清晰,意义比较连贯。
第三档(11-15) 平平淡淡 1/3的语言错误 1.创造了基本合理的内容,有一定的逻辑性,续写基本完整,与原文情境相关。
2.使用了较恰当的词汇和语法结构,表达方式不够多样性,表达有些许错误,但基本不影响理解
3.使用了语句间衔接手段,全文结构比较清晰,意义基本连贯。
第二档(6-10) 马马虎虎 一半的语言错误 1.创造了基本完整的故事内容,但情节不够合理或逻辑性不强,与原文情境基本相关。
2.使用了简单的词汇和语法结构,有部分语言错误或不恰当之处,个别部分影响理解。
3.尚有语句衔接手段,全文结构基本清晰,意义基本连贯。
第一档(1-5) 糊里糊涂 2/3的语言错误 1.内容和逻辑上有较多重大问题或有部分内容抄自原文,续写不完整与原文情境节本脱节。
2.所使用的词汇非常有限,语法结构单调,错误较多,严重影响理解。
3.几乎没有使用语句间衔接手段,全文结构不清晰,意义不连贯。
(0分) 干干净净 未作答;所写内容太少或无法看清以致无法评判,所写内容全部抄自原文或与题目要求完全不相关。
续写得高分的关键
思维上与上文连贯, 融洽度高;
与所给短文及段落开头句衔接合理;
内容上脉络清晰、故事完整;
语言上用词丰富、准确、句式多样;
对周围环境和人物的心理描写生动、到位;
书写美观、卷面整洁,字数在规定范围内。
内涵和颜值
Step one
Reading
Food feeds our stomachs whereas reading feeds our minds.
食物喂养我们的胃而阅读喂养我们的大脑。
根据记叙文的六要素弄清文章大意,特别要弄清故事的人物,地点,时间,事件(故事的情节), 人物的心理, 要解决的冲突,故事要体现的主题
1
1
留意原文的语言特色(以便在续写时语言特色前后一致,保持不变)
2
读懂大意,理清脉络
阅读下面的材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文
Jenny was the only child in her home. She had a quarrel with her mother that afternoon and she ran out of the house angrily. Having wandered aimlessly in the street for hours, she felt a little hungry and wished for something to eat. She stood beside a stand for a while, watching the middle aged seller busy doing his business. However, with no money in hand, she sighed and had to leave.
The seller noticed the young girl and asked, “Hey, girl, you want to have the noodles?”
“Oh, yes...but I don't have money...” she replied.
“I'll treat you today,” said the seller.
The seller brought her a bowl of noodles, whose smell was so attractive. Jenny thanked the seller and started to gobble (狼吞虎咽) up the delicious food...then cried silently.
“What is it?” asked the seller kindly.
“Nothing, actually I was moved by your kindness!” said Jenny as she wiped her tears. “Even a stranger on the street will give me a bowl of noodles, while my mother scolded (骂) me and drove me out of the house. She showed no care for me. She is so mean and cruel!”
Hearing the words, the seller smiled, “Girl, I only gave you a bowl of noodles and you thanked me a lot. But it is your mother who has raised you since you were a baby. Can you number the times that she has cooked for you Have you expressed your thanks to her?”
Jenny sat there, speechless and numb (麻木的) with shock; she remembered her mother's familiar face and weathered hands. “Why did I not think of that A bowl of noodles from a stranger made me feel grateful, but I have never thanked my mum for what she has done for me.”
On the way home, Jenny made up her mind to make an apology to her mother for her rudeness as soon as she arrived home.
Approaching the doorway, Jenny took a deep breath._____________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
A gentle touch on her hair called her mind back.____________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
1. Read for setting and characters:
setting(背景)
when:
where:
that afternoon
home
street
characters(角色)
identity(身份)
Jenny
Jenny’s mother
a seller
a child
a stranger
main characters
minor character(配角)
注1: 续写段落中的时间,地点要根据原文确定,一般不发生大的转移
注2: 原文的主要角色,续文中都要安排“戏”,但一般不要添加新角色。
annoyed
2. Read for plot(情节) and emotion line(情感线)
Climax(高潮)
Beginning
Ending
have a quarrel with her mother
wander aimlessly in the street
feel hungry but have no money to buy food
a seller treat her to a bowel of noodles
cry silently
realize her mistake;
decide to apologize to her mother
direct clue
(明线)
indirect clue
(暗线)
aimless
helpless
grateful
sad/broken-hearted
be comforted and instructed(教导) by
the seller
touched(受触动的)
regretful/guilty(内疚的)
注3: 续写段落中的情节和情感线交替
Story
Mountain
3. Read for conflict(冲突) and theme(主题):
conflict:
theme:
how to resolve the conflict between Jenny and her mother
love between family members
注4: 续写段落就是要解决阅读文本中出现的问题和冲突;
续写段落中的主题必须和阅读文本中的主题保持一致,并呼应。
1. 记叙文: 按时间线索,情感线索来构思情节的发展
2. 阅读文本中语言描写较多, 多为直接引语,续写段落中合适的地方也要用到直接引语,但直接引语不宜过多
3. 时态: 一般过去时
4. Read for language features(语言特色) :
注5:续写段落时,最好根据阅读文本的语言特色来写,保持一致性。
Step Two
Thinking
Learning without thinking leads to confusion.
Thinking without learning ends in danger.
学而不思则罔;思而不学则殆
Remember:
Mind you :
Creative并不意味着天马行空的想象,读后续写和一般故事创作不一样在于它是有一定框架和指引的,是带着镣铐在跳舞。读后续写必须是有逻辑的,在此之上的创意才是令人欣赏的。
细读两段续写的开头句,理顺续写段落的逻辑关系,合理创新故事情节。
1. 框架(framework)构思
(1) 由第一段的首句和第二段的首句确定第一段的内容;
第二段的内容由第二段首句和正能量结尾来确定
(2) 每段写四到五句话(包括首句), 先确定每段的时间,地点,人物;
第一段先根据首句构思第二句, 再根据第二段首句构思末句, 中间句最后构思;
第二段根据首句按照顺序构思, 第二段的结尾句是整篇文章的结尾, 要关注与文章开头
的遥相呼应, 弘扬感情的真,人性的善, 拼搏的美等来凸显主题, 升华境界。
Approaching(走近) the doorway, Jenny took a deep breath. _____________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________
A gentle touch on her hair called her mind back. _________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________________________
2. 情节(plot)构思
aspects
(方面)
elements(要素):
人物, 地点, 时间…
order(顺序):
时间顺序,故事发展的逻辑顺序…
content(内容):
所做,所说(一般两三个直接引语足够),所见,所闻,所反应,
所感…
emotion(情感):
description(描写):
喜怒哀乐…
语言描写, 心理描写, 动作描写, 场景描写, 情绪描写, 神态描写,外貌描写…
Para1: Approaching(走近) the doorway, Jenny took a deep breath.
时间:
地点:
人物:
情节:
第2句: Her feeling when she opened the door
中间句: She found mother wasn’t at home; What did she do How did she feel
Para2: A gentle touch on her hair called her mind back.
情绪描写,动作描写
Jenny
that afternoon
末句: Shame and regret took hold of Jenny.
心理描写, 表情描写
home
环境描写,动作描写,心理描写
Para2: A gentle touch on her hair called her mind back.
时间:
人物:
地点:
情节:
第2句: Who touched her hair
中间句: What did mom say What was Jenny’s response
动作描写,表情描写
Jenny and her mother
home
that afternoon
结尾句: Jenny apologized to her mother; the response of her mother; the theme was presented.
语言描写, 动作描写,表情描写
语言描写,动作描写,表情描写
Step Three
Writing
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.
授之于鱼不如授之以渔
撰写初稿,润色成文
1. 并列句和三大复合句
2.非谓语(v-ing作状语,with的复合结构,独立主格结构等)
3.特殊句式(强调句型,倒装句,虚拟语气等)
4.修辞手法(比喻,拟人,夸张等)
5.恰当的修饰词(形容词,副词,介词短语等)
6.“喜怒哀乐”的高级描写
7.无灵主语句的使用
8 “连动法”使动作描写更生动
9.高级词汇和短语的使用
10.用恰当的衔接词使故事更有连贯性
……
Para1: Approaching(走近) the doorway, Jenny took a deep breath.
第2句:
中间句: She found mother wasn’t at home; What did she do What did she feel
Not knowing whether her mother would forgive her, she opened the door, with butterflies in her stomach.
Her feeling when she opened the door.
情绪描写,动作描写
环境描写,动作描写,心理描写
Much to her surprise, a deep quietness filled the room; her mother wasn’t at home.
Tired and sad, she threw herself into the sofa.
“Where could my mother be?” she wondered. “Was she still angry with me?”
The scene of the quarrel appeared in her mind.
末句: Shame and regret took hold of Jenny.
心理描写, 表情描写
Realizing that all the scolding from her mother was due to the fact that her mother really cared a lot about her, she felt rather ashamed, and tears began to roll down her cheeks.
Para2: A gentle touch on her hair called her mind back.
第2句:
中间句: What did mom say What was Jenny’s response
She raised her head with surprise , seeing the familiar face of her mother.
Who touched her hair
动作描写,表情描写
语言描写,动作描写,表情描写
“I've been seeking for you.” her mum said with a smile, hugely relieved.
Shame hitting, the girl kept silent, having no courage to look her mother in the eyes.
She couldn't help throwing her arms around mum tightly.
结尾句: Jenny apologized to her mother; the response of her mother; the theme was presented.
“Mum, I'm so sorry and thank you for all you have done for me,” she expressed her sincere apology and great gratitude.
Hearing this, her mother smiled patting her back gently, “I love you regardless, my girl.”
Happiness floating in the room, Jenny and her mother immersed themselves in the love of the family.
语言描写,动作描写,表情描写
Step Four
Checking
Man is error! Improve yourself by trial and errors.
1) Agreement (主谓一致)
2) Tense (时态)
3) Spellings (单词拼写)
4) Punctuations (标点符号)
Approaching(走近) the doorway, Jenny took a deep breath. Not knowing whether her mother would forgive her, she opened the door, with butterflies in her stomach. Much to her surprise, a deep quietness filled the room; her mother wasn’t at home. Tired and sad, she threw herself into the sofa. “Where could my mother be?” she wondered. “Was she still angry with me?” Again, the scene of the quarrel appeared in her mind. Realizing that all the blame from her mother was due to the fact that her mother really cared a lot about her, she felt rather ashamed, and tears began to roll down her cheeks.
A gentle touch on her hair called her mind back. She raised her head with surprise , seeing the familiar face of her mother. “I've been seeking for you.” her mum said with a smile, hugely relieved. Shame hitting, the girl kept silent, having no courage to look her mother in the eyes. She couldn't help throwing her arms around mum tightly. “Mum, I'm so sorry and thank you for all you have done for me,” she expressed her sincere apology and great gratitude. Hearing this, her mother smiled patting her back gently, “I love you regardless, my girl.” Happiness floating in the room, Jenny and her mother immersed themselves in the love of the family.