读后续写：一段雷声背后的深情故事 讲义-2025届高考英语复习写作专项
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| 名称 | 读后续写：一段雷声背后的深情故事 讲义-2025届高考英语复习写作专项 |  | |
| 格式 | docx | ||
| 文件大小 | 23.2KB | ||
| 资源类型 | 教案 | ||
| 版本资源 | 人教版（2019） | ||
| 科目 | 英语 | ||
| 更新时间 | 2025-01-30 22:28:59 | ||
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读后续写：一段雷声背后的深情故事 讲义
读后续写
The weather had been unusually hot. My wife Pat and I were having a cup of coffee on our deck. There was rarely any breeze, and it was extremely wet. The sky turned dark. Lightning danced across the sky, accompanied by low, rumbling thunder. The heavy air seemed to press down on us, adding to our discomfort and unease.
Suddenly, the phone rang. It was our son, David, an Army helicopter pilot. Three months earlier, he had begun a one-year assignment in a demilitarized zone in South Korea. David made an effort to sound cheerful, but as a man who had spent time during World War II on a small South Pacific island, I recognized the strong sense of homesickness.
A booming clap of thunder shook again.
“What was that ” David asked, “It sounded like an explosion.”
“Just thunder,” Pat said.
There were several seconds of silence. “David,” I asked, “Are you still there ”
“I was thinking about what Mother said — ‘just thunder.’ Other than the two of you, do you know what I miss most of all — what many of the men say they miss Thunder. We have rain, wind, snow, and some violent storms, but never thunder.” “Remember, Dad, when I was a boy, how the two of us would stretch out on the floor and listen to the thunder I wish I were there now to listen with you,” he said softly.
As soon as I hung up the phone, I got my tape recorder, my large umbrella, and a wooden chair. “I’m going to record our son some thunder,” I told Pat.
With lightning lashing across the sky like a display of fireworks, I sat in the driving rain beneath my umbrella and recorded half an hour of the finest Mississippi thunder a lonely man could ever want to hear. The next day, I mailed the tape to David with a single line: “A special gift.”
第一段：David called again three weeks later.
第二段：From then on, thunder had different meanings for Pat and me.
详细的解题思路
这篇文章讲述了父亲与在韩国服役的儿子David通过雷声建立情感纽带的故事。父亲在听到儿子因思乡而怀念雷声后，决定为儿子录制一段雷声，表达对儿子的关爱。文章的情感表现力主要体现在人物的内心波动和父子之间的情感互动上。因此，如何通过细腻的情感描写和精准的结构设计来突出父亲的孤独和思念、儿子的情感需求，是关键所在。
解题步骤：
1. 理清情节主线：
情感冲突： 父亲意识到儿子远在他乡，面对雷声带来的情感波动。
情感表达： 父亲通过录制雷声并寄送给儿子的方式表达对儿子的思念与关怀。
转折点： 父亲在决定录制雷声的过程中，经历了情感的纠结和思考。
2. 明确续写的情感转折：
第一段： 通过父亲的内心挣扎与疑虑，引出父亲为儿子录制雷声的情感动机。
第二段： 父亲将录音寄给儿子后，儿子回忆与父亲的共鸣，引发情感升华。
3. 运用十句五定法：
固定句式的应用： 通过情感描写、动作链推进和结局升华等句式，逐步展开故事情节。
非固定句式的补充： 通过细节描写和环境描写丰富情感层次，推动情节向高潮发展。
第一段：情感描写与内心的情感波动
1. 情感描写（开篇点题）：
句式： "A sense of loneliness washed over me, making me feel even more isolated and yearning for my son."
解释与写作思路： 开篇通过“孤独”这一情感词汇，明确表现出父亲在面对雷声时的情感波动，带出父子间的情感冲突。
2. 细节描写：
句式： "My hands trembled slightly as I reached for the phone, my heart pounding in my chest."
解释与写作思路： 通过父亲内心的情感波动，引出细节描写，强化人物内心的不安与思念。
3. 动作链推进（承接情节）：
句式： "Upon hearing David’s voice, I rushed to the closet, grabbed my tape recorder, and rushed back to the deck."
解释与写作思路： 描写父亲如何迅速做出反应，采取行动录制雷声，为接下来的情节发展做铺垫。
4. 冲突铺垫（为转折埋下伏笔）：
句式： "I hesitated for a moment, unsure if recording the thunder would really make a difference."
解释与写作思路： 父亲在做决定时的犹豫，增加情节的复杂性，为接下来的转折做准备。
5. 情节转折（高潮）：
句式： "No sooner had I hit the record button than a loud clap of thunder rang out, echoing through the air."
解释与写作思路： 通过雷声的响起，推动情节向高潮发展，增强情感的表达。
第二段：情感升华与主题点睛
6. 结局升华：
句式： "Having recorded the thunder, I felt a wave of relief, realizing that I had done something special for David."
解释与写作思路： 父亲在完成这一行为后，感到情感的释然与安心，提升文章的情感层次。
7. 细节描写（补充情感）：
句式： "As the rain poured around me, I smiled, feeling closer to David despite the distance."
解释与写作思路： 通过自然环境的细节，展现父亲内心的平静与满足，为故事的情感升华增加层次。
8. 动作与情感结合（推动故事）：
句式： "I sat back, watching the lightning dance across the sky, a sense of peace filling my heart."
解释与写作思路： 通过细腻的动作描写，将父亲的情感与环境相结合，推动情节走向高潮。
9. 他人反应或对话：
句式： "When David called again, his voice full of gratitude, I knew that the gesture had meant more than I could imagine."
解释与写作思路： 通过儿子的反应，体现父亲行为的意义，进一步推进故事情感发展。
10. 主题点睛：
句式： "This experience taught me that love transcends distance, and sometimes, the simplest gestures are the most meaningful."
解释与写作思路： 通过总结性语言，点明故事的主题，升华情感，为文章画上完美的句号。
完整的续写示例
第一段：
A sense of loneliness washed over me, making me feel even more isolated and yearning for my son. My hands trembled slightly as I reached for the phone, my heart pounding in my chest. Upon hearing David’s voice, I rushed to the closet, grabbed my tape recorder, and rushed back to the deck. I hesitated for a moment, unsure if recording the thunder would really make a difference. No sooner had I hit the record button than a loud clap of thunder rang out, echoing through the air. The sound felt oddly comforting, as if it were a bridge connecting me to David, even though he was miles away.第二段：
Having recorded the thunder, I felt a wave of relief, realizing that I had done something special for David. As the rain poured around me, I smiled, feeling closer to David despite the distance. I sat back, watching the lightning dance across the sky, a sense of peace filling my heart. When David called again, his voice full of gratitude, I knew that the gesture had meant more than I could imagine. This experience taught me that love transcends distance, and sometimes, the simplest gestures are the most meaningful.
读后续写
The weather had been unusually hot. My wife Pat and I were having a cup of coffee on our deck. There was rarely any breeze, and it was extremely wet. The sky turned dark. Lightning danced across the sky, accompanied by low, rumbling thunder. The heavy air seemed to press down on us, adding to our discomfort and unease.
Suddenly, the phone rang. It was our son, David, an Army helicopter pilot. Three months earlier, he had begun a one-year assignment in a demilitarized zone in South Korea. David made an effort to sound cheerful, but as a man who had spent time during World War II on a small South Pacific island, I recognized the strong sense of homesickness.
A booming clap of thunder shook again.
“What was that ” David asked, “It sounded like an explosion.”
“Just thunder,” Pat said.
There were several seconds of silence. “David,” I asked, “Are you still there ”
“I was thinking about what Mother said — ‘just thunder.’ Other than the two of you, do you know what I miss most of all — what many of the men say they miss Thunder. We have rain, wind, snow, and some violent storms, but never thunder.” “Remember, Dad, when I was a boy, how the two of us would stretch out on the floor and listen to the thunder I wish I were there now to listen with you,” he said softly.
As soon as I hung up the phone, I got my tape recorder, my large umbrella, and a wooden chair. “I’m going to record our son some thunder,” I told Pat.
With lightning lashing across the sky like a display of fireworks, I sat in the driving rain beneath my umbrella and recorded half an hour of the finest Mississippi thunder a lonely man could ever want to hear. The next day, I mailed the tape to David with a single line: “A special gift.”
第一段：David called again three weeks later.
第二段：From then on, thunder had different meanings for Pat and me.
详细的解题思路
这篇文章讲述了父亲与在韩国服役的儿子David通过雷声建立情感纽带的故事。父亲在听到儿子因思乡而怀念雷声后，决定为儿子录制一段雷声，表达对儿子的关爱。文章的情感表现力主要体现在人物的内心波动和父子之间的情感互动上。因此，如何通过细腻的情感描写和精准的结构设计来突出父亲的孤独和思念、儿子的情感需求，是关键所在。
解题步骤：
1. 理清情节主线：
情感冲突： 父亲意识到儿子远在他乡，面对雷声带来的情感波动。
情感表达： 父亲通过录制雷声并寄送给儿子的方式表达对儿子的思念与关怀。
转折点： 父亲在决定录制雷声的过程中，经历了情感的纠结和思考。
2. 明确续写的情感转折：
第一段： 通过父亲的内心挣扎与疑虑，引出父亲为儿子录制雷声的情感动机。
第二段： 父亲将录音寄给儿子后，儿子回忆与父亲的共鸣，引发情感升华。
3. 运用十句五定法：
固定句式的应用： 通过情感描写、动作链推进和结局升华等句式，逐步展开故事情节。
非固定句式的补充： 通过细节描写和环境描写丰富情感层次，推动情节向高潮发展。
第一段：情感描写与内心的情感波动
1. 情感描写（开篇点题）：
句式： "A sense of loneliness washed over me, making me feel even more isolated and yearning for my son."
解释与写作思路： 开篇通过“孤独”这一情感词汇，明确表现出父亲在面对雷声时的情感波动，带出父子间的情感冲突。
2. 细节描写：
句式： "My hands trembled slightly as I reached for the phone, my heart pounding in my chest."
解释与写作思路： 通过父亲内心的情感波动，引出细节描写，强化人物内心的不安与思念。
3. 动作链推进（承接情节）：
句式： "Upon hearing David’s voice, I rushed to the closet, grabbed my tape recorder, and rushed back to the deck."
解释与写作思路： 描写父亲如何迅速做出反应，采取行动录制雷声，为接下来的情节发展做铺垫。
4. 冲突铺垫（为转折埋下伏笔）：
句式： "I hesitated for a moment, unsure if recording the thunder would really make a difference."
解释与写作思路： 父亲在做决定时的犹豫，增加情节的复杂性，为接下来的转折做准备。
5. 情节转折（高潮）：
句式： "No sooner had I hit the record button than a loud clap of thunder rang out, echoing through the air."
解释与写作思路： 通过雷声的响起，推动情节向高潮发展，增强情感的表达。
第二段：情感升华与主题点睛
6. 结局升华：
句式： "Having recorded the thunder, I felt a wave of relief, realizing that I had done something special for David."
解释与写作思路： 父亲在完成这一行为后，感到情感的释然与安心，提升文章的情感层次。
7. 细节描写（补充情感）：
句式： "As the rain poured around me, I smiled, feeling closer to David despite the distance."
解释与写作思路： 通过自然环境的细节，展现父亲内心的平静与满足，为故事的情感升华增加层次。
8. 动作与情感结合（推动故事）：
句式： "I sat back, watching the lightning dance across the sky, a sense of peace filling my heart."
解释与写作思路： 通过细腻的动作描写，将父亲的情感与环境相结合，推动情节走向高潮。
9. 他人反应或对话：
句式： "When David called again, his voice full of gratitude, I knew that the gesture had meant more than I could imagine."
解释与写作思路： 通过儿子的反应，体现父亲行为的意义，进一步推进故事情感发展。
10. 主题点睛：
句式： "This experience taught me that love transcends distance, and sometimes, the simplest gestures are the most meaningful."
解释与写作思路： 通过总结性语言，点明故事的主题，升华情感，为文章画上完美的句号。
完整的续写示例
第一段：
A sense of loneliness washed over me, making me feel even more isolated and yearning for my son. My hands trembled slightly as I reached for the phone, my heart pounding in my chest. Upon hearing David’s voice, I rushed to the closet, grabbed my tape recorder, and rushed back to the deck. I hesitated for a moment, unsure if recording the thunder would really make a difference. No sooner had I hit the record button than a loud clap of thunder rang out, echoing through the air. The sound felt oddly comforting, as if it were a bridge connecting me to David, even though he was miles away.第二段：
Having recorded the thunder, I felt a wave of relief, realizing that I had done something special for David. As the rain poured around me, I smiled, feeling closer to David despite the distance. I sat back, watching the lightning dance across the sky, a sense of peace filling my heart. When David called again, his voice full of gratitude, I knew that the gesture had meant more than I could imagine. This experience taught me that love transcends distance, and sometimes, the simplest gestures are the most meaningful.