(共20张PPT)
专题二 读后续写
第2讲 微观把握 突破读后续写
技法四 营造续写故事的高潮
●技法点拨
故事中的高潮是指故事达到最紧张或扣人心弦的那一部分。高潮有时候是剧情中的“危机”点。有时候，它只是达到了关键时刻或者转折点，发生了一些事情，或者主角必须做出决定，从而导致一个结果。
妙招1 增加外部冲突
增加外部冲突是一种明显有效的可以达到故事高潮的方式。
(1)角色之间的冲突
On the fourth or fifth night, we had trouble finding a hotel with a vacancy.After driving in vain for time, Mom suddenly got a great idea: Why didn't we find a house with a likely-looking backyard and ask if we could set up a tent there？David and I became nervous.
【解析】 开车找旅馆→徒劳无功→母亲建议在他人的后院搭帐篷→David和“我”倍感紧张，心有不悦(母子的观点不一)
(2)随时间的发展，决策变得紧急
The car abruptly stopped in front of him.“Get into the car！” Paul shouted at Mac.Mac jumped off the bike and slid into the car without delay as the wolf was just two steps away and was about to tear Mac into pieces.What a narrow escape!
【解析】 汽车突停面前→急喊上车→Mac 上车避险→饿狼近在咫尺(此情此景，刻不容缓)
(3) 使用环境描写增加不确定性
充分利用环境描写可以起到烘托故事高潮的作用。当故事角色在碰到困难的时候，我们往往要加大笔墨来描写故事环境的黑暗、恐怖和不祥。强化环境描写可以增强高潮元素，使读者感受到紧张倍增。
Immediately, an absolute darkness ruled the forest.(黑暗)Even worse, the temperature suddenly dropped dramatically.(寒冷)It didn't take long for the forest to be enveloped in darkness.(黑暗)Her rasping breath steamed in the moonlight and her throat was parched from thirst.(寒冷)
(4) 由于增加的障碍，人物角色必须克服挑战，以达到他们的目标
But before we jumped off the horses, we found that we had been off the beaten track and got lost.We had no idea where we were and it got dark.Exhausted and hungry, I wondered if we could find our way back.
【解析】 草原迷路(障碍1)——天色渐黑(障碍2)——又累又饿(障碍3)——心理恐慌(障碍4)
妙招2 放大内心冲突
放大内心冲突(文中角色的内心斗争)也有助于建立一个高度紧张和不确定的时刻。
But no more helicopters came and it was getting dark again.Jane was so tired, hungry, and extremely frightened.She thought to herself, “If only I had not quarrelled with Tom.Where is Tom？He must have made the emergency call.What I need is enough courage.If I continue my spirits tomorrow, I will be likely to guide the helicopter.” Lying beside the stream, she fell asleep very soon.Suddenly, she heard the shouts of tigers, which made her scared to death.After she held her breath for a few minutes, everything was quiet again.In the terrible darkness, she slept again.
【解析】 夫妇争吵——妻子独自行走——荒野走散，夜色渐黑——独处森林——阴森恐怖——后悔莫及(内心冲突的刻画)——内心独白(往昔对比＋虚拟语气的使用＋旁白描写是常见技巧之一)
●真题体验
(2023·新高考Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)
When I was in middle school, my social studies teacher asked me to enter a writing contest.I said no without thinking.I did not love writing.My family came from Brazil, so English was only my second language.Writing was so difficult and painful for me that my teacher had allowed me to present my paper on the sinking of the Titanic by acting out a play, where I played all the parts.No one laughed harder than he did.
So, why did he suddenly force me to do something at which I was sure to fail？His reply: “Because I love your stories.If you're willing to apply yourself, I think you have a good shot at this.” Encouraged by his words, I agreed to give it a try.
I chose Paul Revere's horse as my subject.Paul Revere was a silversmith(银匠) in Boston who rode a horse at night on April 18, 1775 to Lexington to warn people that British soldiers were coming.My story would come straight from the horse's mouth.Not a brilliant idea, but funny; and unlikely to be anyone else's choice.
What did the horse think, as he sped through the night？Did he get tired？Have doubts？Did he want to quit？I sympathized immediately.I got tired.I had doubts.I wanted to quit.But, like Revere's horse, I kept going.I worked hard.I checked my spelling.I asked my older sister to correct my grammar.I checked out a half dozen books on Paul Revere from the library.I even read a few of them.
When I handed in the essay to my teacher, he read it, laughed out loud, and said, “Great.Now, write it again.” I wrote it again, and again and again.When I finally finished it, the thought of winning had given way to the enjoyment of writing.If I didn't win, I wouldn't care.
注意：
1．续写词数应为150左右；
2．请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
A few weeks later, when I almost forgot the contest, there came the news.
I went to my teacher's office after the award presentation.
【解题示范】 第一步：精读短文，掌握关键信息。
本文以人物为线索展开，讲述了作者上中学的时候，社会学老师邀请作者参加一个写作比赛。作者不喜欢写作，于是想都没想就拒绝了。但是在老师的鼓励下，作者同意试一试。作者在写作过程中虽然很累，但是没有放弃，坚持了下来。在作者最终完成写作时，作者感到写作让他很快乐，他已经不在乎输赢了。
第二步：根据已知，构思续写思路。
1．由第一段首句内容“几个星期后，当我几乎忘记比赛的时候，传来了消息。”和第二段首句“颁奖后我去了老师的办公室。”可知，第一段可描写作者获得比赛一等奖，在颁奖典礼上作者表达了对社会老师的感激。
2．由第二段首句内容“颁奖后我去了老师的办公室。”可知，第二段可描写老师鼓励作者继续写作，自此作者坚持写作取得了成功，作者将这一切归功于自己的老师。
第三步：结合情景，添加具体细节。
根据题目所提供两段首句构思的续写思路，继而思考续写线索：比赛消息传来——作者获奖——高兴——颁奖典礼感谢老师——颁奖后来到老师办公室——老师告诉作者坚持写作——作者表达了对写作的喜爱——作者写作取得了成功——感激老师。
第四步：拟写草稿，修改错词病句。
在搭建好写作框架和基本内容后，开始着手打草稿，对罗列的要点进行重新筛选和整合，适当拓展要点，尽量使用表意准确、形象生动、符合以英语为母语的人的习惯表达方式的高级词汇，同时应注意长短句结合，让句式灵活多变，以体现考生深厚的语言功底，使文章更出彩。如行为类：①告知：inform/tell②成功做到：make it/succeed③表达：express/convey；情绪类：①高兴的：happy/glad②激动地：excitedly/with excitement；高分句式：I was informed that I won the first prize in the writing contest and that there would be an award presentation in two days.(运用了由连接词that引导的宾语从句)，It's you who make me fall in love with writing, my social studies teacher.(运用了强调句)，I owe my success to my social teacher who is a beacon in my life on the road to writing.(运用了who引导的限制性定语从句)等。
第五步：润色成篇，规范誊写文章。
在誊写文章时，还需要对语言进行修饰、润色，恰当运用衔接手段，以使文本紧凑流畅。
【优秀作文赏析】
A few weeks later, when I almost forgot the contest, there came the news. I was informed that I won the first prize in the writing contest and that there would be an award presentation in two days.I was so happy to hear the news that I immediately shared it with my teacher.“I knew you'd win! I am proud of you.You made it！” he said excitedly.Then came the big day.When I was invited to the stage to receive the award, I expressed my thanks to my teacher.I said, “It's you who make me fall in love with writing, my social studies teacher.Without your recognition and guidance, I couldn't have written this article.Again thank you very much！”
I went to my teacher's office after the award presentation. My teacher was waiting for me.Holding my hands, he said “Congratulations! You are a good writer, so keep writing.” “You know I didn't like writing before, but now I am crazy about it! I will try my best to create good works.” I said seriously.Since then, I have written many good works and now I am a famous writer.I owe my success to my social teacher who is a beacon in my life on the road to writing.专题二 第2讲 技法四
模拟练 提考能
(2024·湘豫名校联考高三一模)
A few years ago, as a teenager, I experienced daily migraines (偏头痛) that made me want to hit my head against a brick wall.I was desperate to find a cure.For those of you who have experienced this pain, I can sense you silently nodding in agreement, while for those of you who have not experienced it, it is by no means an overstatement to say that the experience is suffering.
I had tried everything.Unfortunately, nothing worked as a continuous cure for my unfortunate painful condition.In my hopelessness, my father told me to try acupuncture (针灸), which he had experienced once in Hong Kong.It had helped cure his lower back when no other forms of therapy or medicine had worked.
I had no idea about acupuncture and had never experienced traditional Chinese medicine before.With no expectations due to my previous disappointments in my search for a treatment, I went on my journey of acupuncture, and soon found myself in a middle-aged woman's office which was surrounded by Chinese herbal medicines.
After I sat myself down on the patient chair, she asked me why I had come in.Then, she placed three fingers on my wrist and silently felt my pulse.I was then taken to a room and told to lie down.Soon, she took out the needles which made me quite worried because such objects make me uneasy.
The initial procedure of receiving acupuncture proved to be quite surprising.To address my migraines, acupuncture was first administered to the back of my hand, which is nowhere near my head.The feeling was quite unexpected too：as the doctor carefully tapped and twisted the needle in, I did not sense the needle itself, but rather an effect that rippled (起伏) throughout my entire body.The doctor then continued to tap and twist more needles throughout my entire body：head, face, stomach, legs, arms, and toes.The entire process was over in 20 minutes.She then gave some herbal medicine to me to drink every day for five days.
注意：
1．续写词数应为150 左右；
2．请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
I returned to the doctor for a total of 10 times.
Acupuncture did change my life.
【范文】
I returned to the doctor for a total of 10 times. Each time the same routine was repeated and the same herbal medicine was given as a follow-up.The benefits of the acupuncture treatment appeared gradually after several more treatments.My attitude toward acupuncture also gradually changed from doubtful to confident.After the whole course of treatment, I was cured of my migraines, and for two years I had not experienced a single reappearance.
Acupuncture did change my life. I have found a healthy and natural treatment to my migraines.Even more, I've learned, through my treatments, of the many acupressure points on my body and I would massage certain areas on my hand every day to prevent migraines and also sometimes to treat other illnesses.This has also allowed me to massage acupressure points for my friends when they complain of a headache.I am now a promoter for acupuncture because of all the benefits it has brought me.If you have also been suffering from the conditions I suffered, I would highly recommend trying acupuncture.
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