(共23张PPT)
众 “说” 纷 纭
读后续写之各种不同的“说”描写
Dialogue
对话 (dialogue) 是故事角色在整个故事中对彼此或对自己说的话。它可以用来揭示人物的性格和个性,它也可以用来推动情节向前发展,并展示情节发展的过程。我们需要用各种细节将主题编织进故事之中,让其不时地闪现,以展示故事的全部内涵。对话无疑是一种可以让全部内容显现出来的元素。人物在交谈、细语、呼喊、低吼、抱怨、讥讽、哀叹,而读者在倾听。相较于用枯燥的、阐释性的长篇大论去传达主题,对话这种方式不仅更快捷有效,而且更能激起读者的情感。
对话描写三原则
● 真情实感
在对人物进行对话描写时, 真情实感是贴切人物的最好表达, 尽量避免过于“高大上”或“假大空”, 脱离人物的真实身份。
● 描写比重恰到好处
在对人物冲突中的具体的对话描写, 要注意在文中段落中的比重问题, 切忌以全对话或大部分对话代替其他细节描写, 要恰到好处。
● 推动情节发展
对话描写不推动情节发展、不反映人物特色、不刻画情感内涵,就是耍流氓……^_^
Part 1 你真的了解对话描写的构成吗?
“I hate them” , said Samuel angrily.
“I hate them” , Samuel said in an angry voice.
“I hate them” , screamed Samuel, clenching his fists.
“I hate them” , screamed Samuel, his lips trembling and face twisted.
“I hate them” , screamed Samuel, who looked as if he had broken down.
Speech
话语
Dialogue tag
对话标签
Description
描述
Part 2 你能发现下列对话描写中的问题吗?
1)“Hey, how are you ”, said Tom. “I‘m fine, how are you ” answered Jack.
2)“That is fantastic news,” he said happily in a loud voice.
3)“That's funny,” Lily giggled.
4) “I told you already,” I said, glaring.
1)“Hey, how are you ”, said Tom. “I‘m fine, how are you ” answered Jack.
2)“That is fantastic news,” he said happily in a loud voice.
● 废话连篇,对情节发展和刻画人物没有帮助。
● 追求花哨,过度使用对话标签。此句中完全没有必要加上一个happily来表达说的方式,因为句中的fantastic一词足以说明说话人了表情,过度强调 会让读者的注意力集中在“说话的方式”而不是“说话的内容”。
改:“That is fantastic news!” he said / screamed / exclaimed.
3)“That's funny,” Lily giggled.
4) “I told you already,” I said, glaring.
● 用词不当,逻辑混乱
改:“That's funny,” Lily said, giggling.
● 对话标签多此一举:对话对象十分明确,仍使用对话标签。此句对话中的主语“I”已经清晰地说明了说话者,完全没有必要用 dialogue tag“I said”来说明说话对象。
改:I glared at him,“I told you already.”
问与答
1. She greeted James and _______________ (询问), “Are you ready for our field trip ” James didn’t _________________ (回应).
提议、警告
2. “Maybe we should have a peace talk with China. Anyhow, China is not what it used to be”, an military officer ______________________
(提议)
3. A general ___________________ (警告),“We cannot go to war with China! They have the best hypersonic missles in the world!”
Part 3 众“说”纷纭
asked / inquired
reply / respond
advised / proposed
cautioned / warned
小声说
4. She tiptoed into the room and ________________ (悄悄说) to me, “I looked at every plant and I know I got the best one!”
5. "How lovely this puppy is," she ___________________ (低声说).
6. "She must be really mad at me," he ________ (嘟哝道) and sighed.
7. He ___________ (安慰道) her, “Tomorrow is another day.”
大声说
8. “Here, Mum! Here!” Reuben _________ (惊叫) in a high-pitched voice as he ran to her side.
9. "Are you coming or not " they ____________________ (大声喊叫) out after him.
10. "I'll kill you for that," he _________ (咆哮).
11. "They could come to uncle," Peter ___________ (低吼).
whispered
murmured / muttered
mumbled
comforted
exclaimed
shouted / yelled / cried
roared
growled
其他“说”
12. Hearing this, the tree smiled with relief, _____________ (补充说): “My dying trunk is the right one for e here and have a seat.”
13. Then Ashley _______________ (继续说), “Well, let’s go and see!”
14. She _______________ (承认), “I’m your secret friend and I’m sorry about the gift.”
15. “Nobody could understand me!” Andy ___________ (啜泣着说), burying his face in his hands.
16. " I shouldn't tell you that! " he ____________(脱口而出).
17. "You're a good man. We all love you." _______________ (齐声说) the kids.
18. "Why, what on earth does this mean, John " he __________ (结巴地说)
adding
continued
admitted
sobbed
blurted (out)
chorused
stammered
Part 4 “漂亮”说的几个公式
1. 对话标签 + 语气tone (in a + adj + tone / in a tone of + 名词)
1)“You must be Annie,”he said in a friendly tone.
2)“I would love to.” said Emily in a pleasant tone.
3)“I don't want to.” said Emily in a tone of impatience.
2. 对话标签 + 嗓音 voice (in a + adj + voice)
4)“I don't know what you mean,” said Fran in a trembling voice.
5)The father picked up the dog, knelt down and said in a soft voice, “It's yours now.”
6)The woman at the desk greeted him in a bored voice.
3. 对话标签 + 表情 (副词 / 介词短语 / 定从)
7)“We’re not in trouble!” I shouted with joy.
8)“I hate you !” she screamed in anger.
9)“I've been waiting for you,”she said with a smile.
10)“I feel like you're abandoning me.” she responded bitterly.
11)“I hate them” , screamed Samuel, who looked as if he had broken down.
12)“I hope so,”said Shmuel, who looked as if he was about to cry.
4. 对话标签 + 肢体动作(分词 / 介短 / 独立主格)
13)“Nobody could understand me!” Andy sobbed, ____________
_______ (手捂着头, doing)
14)__________________ (头低着,with结构), she said,“Sorry......”
15)“Hi, Landy. I’m sorry about the spaghetti thing.” Catherine murmured an apology, ___________________________ (害怕得一动不动, done).
16)“Who dare to go out without my permission!” roared the headmaster, ___________________________________ (眼睛看着那些调皮的孩子, 独立主格).
burying head in his hands.
with her head down
too scared to move an inch
eyes falling on those naughty kids
5. 对话标签 + 想法 (hoping ... / lost in ... / with the expectation of ...)
17)“Will you forgive me for this ” mumbled Lily, _____________
__________(希望Leo会同意)
18)“Maybe tomorrow will be another day.” murmered Rose, _____
________________________________________________ (沉浸在儿子会马上恢复过来的念想中)
19) “Is the news about the holiday true ”, Meimei blurted out, ________________________________________________ (满心期待着一个长假)
hoping Leo would say yes
lost in the thought that her son would recover soon.
overwhelmed with the expection of getting a long holiday
5. 动作描写+对话标签
20)Leo went straight to me and roared, “How dare you not follow my instruction and writing bullshit on the paper!”
21) Mom looked straight into my eyes, saying, “You always are the best”
综合练习
As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared. At the sight of the mess and the kids' gloomy faces,he immediately realized what they were up to."Need any help ”1.
______________________________________________(爸爸微笑地看着双胞胎,温柔地问),who felt discouraged at being found screwing things up. Jeff _________________(结巴地说出) their failed plan, ________________________________(他羞红了脸). "That's a great idea. May I join you " At this the twins cheered up and rolled up their sleeves to clean the stove before they learned to fry the bread following their father's instructions. Soon came the delicious smell of French toast and chicken porridge,at which the twins felt a great sense of achievement. With everything settled,father left the kitchen, ____________(承诺道) to keep their secret.
father gently inquired, smilingly looking at the twins
stammered out
his face flushing with embarrassment
promising
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up.Sitting up in confusion, mother was greeted with the kids' smiling eyes and happy giggles. Before she could realize what was going on, the twins presented the breakfast tray, __________ (大声喊道),"Happy Mother's Day!” ___________________________________________
________________________________(惊讶地盯着精心准备的食物,妈妈饱含深情地说), "Thank you, darling. That's the biggest surprise I've ever had!” It was then that father entered, _____________ (回应) her, “That must be the best breakfast ever!” Mother bit into a piece of toast, nodding her head approvingly with great satisfaction. Exchanging glances, father and the twins beamed brightly with pleasure.
exclaiming
Staring at the carefully prepared food in wide-eyed surprise, mother said affectionately
responding to
课后作业
请根据开头句子续写一段话,描写作者用自己赚来的钱为妈妈买生日礼物,妈妈看到时吃惊和欣喜的情景。要求至少有两句对话描写。
With great excitement and tears, I knocked on the door. ___________
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
With great excitement and tears, I knocked on the door. Mum opened the door. “Surprise!” I yelled, waving the presents in my hands, “Happy Birthday!” Mum stiffed (僵硬) for seconds, and then her face lit up with pleasure. “But, how did you get the money ” Mum asked me, with a confused look on her face. After she knew the truth, she embraced me tightly. In the small but comfortable house, we talked merrily, sharing our stories. It dawned on me that nothing is more blissful than being accompanied by our beloved ones.
Bye