(共61张PPT)
第3讲 精雕细琢,学会打磨语言
一、丰富的句式
二、细化动作描写
目 录 索 引
三、丰富的情感描写
四、环境描写
五、动物描写
一、丰富的句式
1.主从复合句
①(2024新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)Just then I realised that I had zero cash in my wallet.I flashed him an apologetic smile as I pulled out my Portuguese bankcard.
就在那时,我意识到我的钱包里没有现金。我一边掏出我的葡萄牙银行卡,一边向他露出了歉意的微笑。
②(2024新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)He picked me up at the bus station where he had dropped me off four days before.
他在四天前送我下车的汽车站接我。
③It dawned on me that a moment of kindness could mean so much to another,and that a simple act could make the world so much better.
我突然明白,片刻的善意对另一个人来说意义重大,一个简单的行为就可以让世界变得更美好。
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①这个故事吸引了她的注意力,她全神贯注,以至于几乎错过了午饭。
The story drew her attention and she was
(结果状语从句).
②(2024新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)我还给了他一个我在布拉格(Prague)买的精美的纪念品,他高兴地接受了。
I also gave him an attractive souvenir (定语从句), (非限制性定语从句).
so absorbed that she almost missed her lunch
(that) I had bought at Prague
which he accepted with delight
③她明白了,只有拥有创造力和观察力,才可以克服任何挑战。
She learned (宾语从句).
(that) only with creativity and the power of observation could any challenge be overcome
④(2024九省联考)希尔达继续说,事实是,马娅一直在秘密地从水箱中收集物品,并把它们藏在水箱后面的过滤器附近。
The truth of the matter,Hilda continued,is
(表语从句), hiding them near the filter in the back of the tank.
that Maya has been secretly collecting items from the water tank
⑤虽然我想毫无保留地和他分享我的想法,但我没有这样做,唯恐我会阻止他。
(让步状语从句),I failed to do so for fear that I would hold him back.
⑥突然,我想到,我可以打开手机的手电筒作为信号。
Suddenly,it occurred to me
(主语从句).
⑦几个月后,戈德伯格先生分享了这个令人兴奋的消息:很多人在看到这些海报后都来了,他们中的一些决定捐款或收养一条狗。
A couple of months later,Mr.Goldberg shared the exciting news
(同位语从句) and some of them decided to donate money or adopt a dog.
Though I wanted to share my ideas with him fully
that I could turn on the flashlight of the cellphone as a signal
that lots of people came after seeing the posters
2.非谓语动词
①(2024新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)Giving him a firm handshake,I jumped out of the car,made a mad run for the bus,and jumped onto it just before its departure.
我和他紧紧地握了握手,随即跳下车,疯狂地向公共汽车跑去,在发车前跳上了车。
②(2023新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)Encouraged by his words,I agreed to give it a try.
他的话让我深受鼓舞,我同意试一试。
③To save Dora and her father from the critical condition,he quickly extended a helping hand.
为了把多拉和她的父亲从危急情况中救出来,他迅速伸出了援手。
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①(2022浙江6月卷)我需要在社区做一些事情,以完成从高中毕业所需要的社区服务时间。
I needed to do something in my community in order to complete the community service hours .
②为了在所有参赛者中脱颖而出,托尼不遗余力地练习。
,Tony spared no effort to practice.
required to graduate from high school
To stand out among all of the competitors
3.倒装
①Only then did I realize that it was bravery and determination that could conquer all the difficulties.
直到那时,我才意识到,只有勇敢和决心才能克服所有的困难。
②(2023新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)A few weeks later,when I almost forgot the contest,there came the news.
几周后,我几乎忘记比赛的事了,这时消息来了。
③So moved/touched and overjoyed was I that I wanted to give her a big hug to express my deepest gratitude.
我非常感动,欣喜若狂,我想给她一个大大的拥抱,以表达我最深切的感激。
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句式升级
①Eyes open,the woman heard a harmonious “Happy Mother’s Day!” from her twin kids with hot,sweet breakfast before her.Their father stood behind the children.
→Eyes open,the woman heard a harmonious “Happy Mother’s Day!” from her twin kids with hot,sweet breakfast before her.
(倒装).
②For a moment,I felt at a loss for words.I had never expected things to go this way.
→For a moment,I felt at a loss for words.
(倒装).
Behind the children stood their father
Never had I expected things to go this way
4.虚拟语气
①Were it not for his trust and help,I would not have attended the conference.
要不是他的信任和帮助,我就不会参加这次会议。
②How I wish I had spent more time with my grandmother while she were alive!
我多么希望在奶奶活着的时候,我多花点时间陪她啊!
③Had I not volunteered to meet this extraordinary man,I would never have received the benefit of his wise advice.
如果我不是自愿去见这个非凡的人,我就永远都无法受益于他那明智的建议了。
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①(2023新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)“老师,谢谢您。没有您,我不可能发现自己在写作方面有潜力。”
“Thank you,sir.Without you, .”
②我伸出胳膊搂住她,紧紧地抱着她。“谢谢你!你真是一个很好的朋友!如果没有你,我就不会做得这么好!”我喊道。
I threw my arms around her and hugged her tightly.“Thank you!You’re really a wonderful friend! !” I exclaimed.
I couldn’t have found my potential in writing
If it had not been for you,I would not have done so well
③太阳炙烤着他的帽子,他的头感觉就好像着火了一样,消耗着他的能量。
His head feels as the sun is burning through his cap,which consumes his energy.
as if it were on fire
5.感叹句
①How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed!
当他们把早餐端到床前的时候,母亲会多么高兴和自豪啊!
②After the play,parents and students approached Sarah,not just to congratulate her,but also to share how moved they were by Mr.Thompson’s unexpected appearance.
演出结束后,家长和学生们走近萨拉,不仅是为了祝贺她,还是为了分享他们对汤普森先生出乎意料出场的感动。
③When we were floating around,I said,“What a nice holiday! Let’s swim out,not that far.” But we hadn’t considered just how strong the current was on that particular day.
当我们四处漂浮的时候,我说:“多么美好的假期啊!我们游出去吧,不用那么远。”但我们并没有考虑到那天的水流有多湍急。
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①当我坐在长沙发上时,我的心里充满了内疚。我回忆起我的错误是多么可怕,对我的每一个举动都感到后悔。
As I sat on the couch,my heart was filled with guilt.I recalled
,regretting my every move.
②“多么难忘的一天哪!多亏我的叔叔和救援队,我们才得救了。”多拉说。
“ !Thanks to my uncle and the rescue team, we were saved,” said Dora.
how terrible my mistake was
What an unforgettable day
6.独立主格
①(2023浙江1月卷)It seemed that the bird was waiting for me,its beady eyes locked on me as if trying to convey some deep,unspoken gratitude.
那只鸟似乎在等着我,它那炯炯有神的眼睛盯着我,仿佛在试图表达某种深深的、不言而喻的感激之情。
②(2022新高考Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)To our delight,David crossed the finish line smoothly,his face shining with a satisfied smile.
令我们高兴的是,戴维顺利地冲过了终点线,他的脸上洋溢着满足的笑容。
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①所有的眼睛都注视着我,我试图清清嗓子说点儿什么,却只能感受到我怦怦跳动的心。
,I tried to clear my throat to utter something,but what I could feel was my thumping heart.
②考验自己的时刻到来了,我站在跳台的边缘,心怦怦跳,双腿颤抖。我闭上眼睛,带着一种兴奋、恐惧和失重的复杂感觉跳了下去。
As the moment of testing myself arrived,I stood on the edge of the jumping platform, . ,I jumped down,with a mixed sensation of excitement,terror and weightlessness.
All eyes fixed on me
my heart pounding and legs trembling
Eyes closed
③我被他的所作所为深深感动了,眼泪不受控制地流下来。
I was deeply moved by what he had done, .
tears rolling down without control
7.强调句型
①(2023新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)It was your encouragement that made me brave enough to sign up for the competition.
正是你的鼓励让我足够勇敢地报名参加了比赛。
②It was from that day on that he started to learn about the true meaning of honesty.
正是从那天起,他才开始了解诚实的真正含义。
③(2022浙江6月卷)It wasn’t until a couple of hours later that we opened the doors and began serving dinner.
直到几个小时后,我们才开门,开始提供晚餐。
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①不仅是早餐,还有孩子们对她的爱使她非常感动。
moved her very much.
②就在那时,我意识到我的梦想成真了,它所需要的是一点勇气和对自己的信念。
I realized my dream came true,and all it took was a little courage and belief in myself.
It was not only the breakfast but the love of the children for her that
It was at that moment that
③正是这段独特的经历让我明白了无论我们可能面临什么困难,我们都不能放弃希望。
made me understand whatever difficulties we may face,we mustn’t give up hope.
It was this unique experience that
8.无灵主语
①(2024新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)A feeling of helplessness washed over me as I saw the bus queue thinning out.
当我看到公共汽车排队的人越来越少时,一种无助的感觉向我席卷而来。
②Her heart pounded and her legs felt like jelly,but a sense of accomplishment surged through her.
她的心怦怦直跳,双腿发软,但一种成就感涌上心头。
③(2023新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)My heart raced as I read the letter announcing that my essay had won first place!
当我读到那封宣布我的文章获得第一名的信时,我的心跳加速!
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①她一注意到端到床上的早餐,脸上就闪过一丝兴奋。
The instant she noticed the breakfast brought in bed,
.
②尽管身边有很多人,在聚会上他还是感到无比孤独。
Despite being surrounded by many people,
at the party.
③他的鼓励之言使我的精神振奋,给了我继续前进的力量。
His words of encouragement to keep going.
a ripple of excitement flashed on her face
a sense of loneliness consumed him
lifted my spirits and gave me the strength
二、细化动作描写
1.“A,B and C”结构
我发表演讲。
I delivered the speech.
→I took a deep breath to calm myself down,beamed a bright smile and gathered all my courage to deliver the speech.
评析:在细化动作描写中,作者将发表演讲的动作拆解为“深吸一口气+露出灿烂的微笑+鼓起勇气”,并加入了“深吸一口气”的目的,即“让自己平静下来”,通过一系列的动作描写,续写部分的画面感更强了,而且也把作者发表演讲时的状态展现得很生动。
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①(2022新高考Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷)戴维被我的话触动=他抬起头+迎着我专注的目光+低声说“当然,我会做到的”
Struck by my words, ,
“Of course,I will make it.”
②小男孩向母亲道歉=靠近母亲+低下头+向母亲说“对不起”
The little boy
.
③我享受夜晚=吃了一顿美味的晚餐+演奏轻音乐+静静地躺在床上
I .
David raised his head,met my intent gaze and murmured
approached his mother,hung his head and said “Sorry” to his mother
enjoyed a delicious dinner,played soft music and lay on the bed peacefully
2.“句子+非谓语动词”结构
他为孩子们回家做准备。
He prepared for the kids’ coming home.
→He prepared for the kids’ coming home,cleaning the house,mowing the grass and buying their favourite food.
评析:在细化动作描写中,作者加入了“打扫房子”“割草”“买他们最喜欢的食物”三个动作。通过非谓语动词的处理,尽管有一系列的动作,但句子并不显得拥挤。另外,续写部分的画面感更强,人物的形象更饱满,将一个盼望孩子们回家的慈爱的父亲形象刻画得非常生动。
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①本也朝我的方向跑来,把我抱在怀里,一直拍着我的背。
Ben also ran in my direction,
.
②他们坐在沙滩上,享受阳光,既放松又快乐。
They sat on the beach, ,relaxed and happy.
③他们围在营火旁,分享着旅行中发生的一些有趣的事情,享受着这个美妙的时刻。
,they shared something interesting that happened during the trip, .
gathering me into his arms and keeping patting my back
enjoying the sunshine
Gathering around the campfire
enjoying the wonderful moment
三、丰富的情感描写
1.Seeing/Hearing/Thinking of/that...,sb felt/did...
①Hearing the good news,everybody present smiled from ear to ear.
听到这个好消息,在场的每个人都笑得合不拢嘴。
②Seeing a dark figure approaching,Lily felt a strong sense of fear welling up inside her and surging through her body,with tears of hopelessness running down her cheeks.
看到一道黑影靠近,莉莉感到一种强烈的恐惧感涌上心头,涌遍全身,绝望的眼泪顺着她的脸颊流了下来。
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①看到我的队员们失望的脸,我感到我的脸从苍白变得通红。
,I felt my face went from pale white to bright red.
②听到那些话,史蒂文非常感动,他紧紧地抱住了本。
that he hugged Ben tightly.
Seeing the disappointed faces of the members of my team
Hearing those words,Steven was so touched
2.With+身体部位+非谓语动词/形容词(shaking/shining/trembling/wide open/burning hot/lit up/held up high/...),sb+谓语...或Sb+谓语...+with+身体部位+非谓语动词/形容词.
①She burst into laughter,with her eyes shining with excitement.
她突然大笑起来,眼睛里闪烁着兴奋的光芒。
②With his eyes wide open,he stared in disbelief at the incredible sight.
他睁大眼睛,不敢相信地盯着那不可思议的景象看。
③With her head held up high,she crossed the room,each step echoing with the determination that coursed through her veins.
她昂着头穿过房间,每一步都回荡着她血脉中流淌的决心。
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①她一到家,就紧紧地拥抱着母亲,眼睛里充满了泪水。
As soon as she got home,she hugged her mother tightly,
.
②阿利娅昂着头离开了房间,不再是那个害怕数学的学生,而是一个克服了自己的恐惧并相信自己能力的年轻女子。
Aliya left the room ,no longer the student who dreaded math,but a young woman who had conquered her fears and believed in her abilities.
with her eyes filled with tears
with her head held up high
③“看,妈妈,我找到了!”特里斯坦惊叫道,眼睛里闪烁着兴奋的光芒。
“Look,Mom,I found it!” Tristan exclaimed
.
with his eyes twinkling with excitement
3.复杂心情专用表达——情绪词A and情绪词B/情绪词A mixed with情绪词B/a mix of情绪词A and情绪词B
①I felt a mix of excitement and nervousness as I saw the diverse and impressive artworks surrounding mine.
当看到我的艺术作品周围多样且令人印象深刻的艺术作品时,我感到既兴奋又紧张。
②At that very moment,within my heart was a feeling of gratitude,mixed with overwhelming excitement,making me unable to utter any words.
就在那时,我心里有一种感激之情,混杂着极度的兴奋,让我说不出话来。
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①琳达的内心充满愤怒,夹杂着难以言表的羞愧之情,使她不敢面对家人。
Linda’s heart was filled with anger, ,
making her afraid to face her family.
②当她坐在窗边,凝视着夜空中闪烁的星星时,她的心中充满了遗憾和希望。
As she sat by the window,gazing at the twinkling stars in the night sky,
.
mixed with unspeakable shame
her heart was filled with a mix of regret and hope
四、环境描写
1.在文章开头部分,通过环境描写,展现人物的喜悦和陶醉之情。
Honeybees buzzed among the flowers,birds sang beautiful songs,and gentle breezes carried the sweet smell of earth.
蜜蜂在花丛中嗡嗡作响,鸟儿唱着优美的歌,微风带着大地的芳香。(展现自然景象,如蜜蜂、鸟儿和微风的宜人状况,展现了人物身处自然怀抱时愉悦的心情)
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①空气很温暖,阳光很明媚,我早上悠闲地喝着咖啡。
, ,and I was leisurely drinking coffee in the morning.
②清晨的阳光温和地照耀着,芬芳的花朵开怀地笑着,绿色的树欢快地摇曳着,我、汤姆和杰里早早骑着自行车出发,一路上边说边唱。
, ,
,I together with Tom and Jerry set out early riding the bike,talking and singing all the way.
The air was warm
the sun was bright
The morning sunshine shining gently
fragrant flowers smiling from ear to ear
green trees swaying cheerfully
2.在文章主体部分,通过环境描写,暗示事件发展的艰难曲折。
But when the rain poured down,we knew the bad luck wasn’t over.The heavy rain made it even harder to see the road ahead,and the wind started to blow strongly.The car began to shake and swerve on the wet road, making us all very nervous.
但当雨倾盆而下时,我们知道坏运气还没有结束。大雨使我们更难看到前面的道路,风开始猛烈地刮起来。汽车在潮湿的道路上开始摇晃并突然转向,使我们大家都非常紧张。(通过雨倾盆而下、视线受阻、风势加大、汽车摇晃和突然转向等描写,点明了形势的严峻,反映了主人公面临的困难)
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①黑暗渐渐吞噬了森林。没有声音——只有树叶的低语声。可怕的夜风和森林的沙沙声使我更加无助。
Darkness gradually swallowed the forest.There was no sound—only the whispers of the leaves.
added to my helplessness.
②狂风肆虐,雪还下得很大。尽管天气很冷,但我和父亲还是决定要再次出发。
.Despite the freezing air,my father and I were determined to set out again.
The terrifying night wind and the murmurs of the forest
The wind was blowing fiercely,and the snow was still falling heavily
3.在文章结尾部分,通过环境描写,预示事件朝着美好的方向发展。
There in the dark of the night,an enchanting scene unfolded as numerous fireflies illuminated the surroundings.“Fairies are magical.They drive away the darkness!” Meg exclaimed,completely forgetting her fear.
在黑暗的夜晚,迷人的场景展开了,无数的萤火虫照亮了周围的环境。“精灵们是神奇的。它们赶走了黑暗!”梅格惊叫道,完全忘记了她的恐惧。(无数萤火虫照亮了周围的环境,此处的明亮与夜晚的黑暗形成了视觉上的对比,从而揭示了主人公梅格的内心已经被点亮,恐惧的黑暗已经被赶走)
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①温暖的阳光照在我们的脸上,美丽的风景和海浪声使我们经历的所有麻烦似乎都很值得。
,
made all the trouble we had gone through seem worth it.
②大约45分钟后,我看到一个穿着黄色雨衣的高个子人影在黑暗中拿着手电筒大步朝我走来。是安德烈,他冒着暴风雨来找我,每一步都踏着风雨而来。
About 45 minutes later,I saw a tall figure in a yellow raincoat striding toward me in the dark,carrying a flashlight.It was Andrea,who walked through the storm to find me, .
The warm sun on our faces
the beautiful scenery and the sound of the waves
fighting the wind and rain each step of the way
③在我们的旅程中经历起起伏伏是很常见的。但始终要记住“阳光总在风雨后”。
It’s common to experience ups and downs in our journey.But always bear in mind that .
the sun will smile after every storm
五、动物描写
1.温顺的动物
①My pet dog kept me company,resting quietly beside me during the day and pressing warmly against me at night.
我的宠物狗陪伴我,白天安静地在我身边休息,晚上温暖地紧贴着我。
②Every day,when I come home from school,Max greets me at the door with his tail wagging and his eyes sparkling with excitement.
每天,当我放学回到家时,马克斯都会在门口摇着尾巴迎接我,它的眼睛闪烁着兴奋的光芒。
③When their noses smelled the fragrance of the snacks in my hands,they stood in front of me pitifully,as if they wanted to ask me for something to eat.
当它们的鼻子闻到我手里点心的香味时,它们(就会)可怜巴巴地站在我面前,好像想向我要点东西吃。
[对点精练]
完成句子
①主人一到,这条狗猛地站起来,欢快地打着响鼻,蹦蹦跳跳地向前奔跑。
Upon his master’s arrival,the dog ,snorted cheerfully and bounded forward.
②当我张开手时,小鸟并没有飞走,而是坐在那里用它明亮的眼睛看着我。
When I opened my hands,the small bird did not fly away,
but .
③小狗摇着尾巴,蹦蹦跳跳地穿越草地,洋溢着无限精力和热情。
,the puppy bounded across the grass,brimming over with boundless energy and enthusiasm.
leapt to his feet
sat there looking at me with her bright eyes
With its tail wagging
2.凶猛的动物
①At first glance,I thought it was a dog.However,its eyes were so fierce and it howled instead of barking.
乍一看,我还以为那是一条狗呢。然而,它的眼睛非常凶猛,而且它是在嚎叫,而不是在吠叫。
②The enormous grizzly bear roared with rage and its mouth was wide open.
这头巨大的灰熊愤怒地咆哮着,嘴张得大大的。
③Standing tall with its thick fur shining in the warm sunlight,the bear surveyed its surroundings,ready to defend its territory.
熊站在高处,厚厚的皮毛在温暖的阳光下闪闪发光,它审视着周围的环境,准备保卫自己的领地。
[对点精练]
完成句子
①这只狼非常愤怒,一直咆哮着,猛烈地撞击着窗户。
that it kept roaring and smacking into the window violently.
②它的嘴里似乎满是血,眼睛因愤怒而发红,嘴巴张得大大的。
It seemed that his mouth was full of blood,
.
So angry was the wolf
his eyes red with anger and the mouth wide open
3.救助动物
①(2023浙江1月卷改编)The hummingbird was covered with spider-webs and was barely able to move her wings.
蜂鸟身上覆盖着蜘蛛网,翅膀几乎不能动了。
②But after a long wait—and looking all around our house for signs of a nest or a mother squirrel—we realized the tiny squirrel was lost.Shaking terribly, he was weak,thin,and hungry.
但经过长时间的等待——在我们的房子周围寻找巢穴或者松鼠妈妈的迹象——我们意识到这只小松鼠迷路了。它抖得厉害,很虚弱,又瘦又饿。
③After days of care,the fox became familiar with us and was willing to interact with us.
经过几天的照顾,这只狐狸开始熟悉我们,并愿意与我们互动。
[对点精练]
完成句子
①她走近并给它检查了一下,结果发现狗的一条腿严重骨折。那条狗用它那双悲伤的眼睛看着她,好像在向她求助。
She approached and checked it, ,
which looked at her with its sad eyes as if asking her for help.
②让我们宽慰的是,小松鼠很快变得健康、强壮起来。几周内,它变得更加活跃了。
To our relief,the tiny squirrel soon .
Within a few weeks, .
only to find one of the dog’s legs severely broken
became healthy and strong
it became more active
③意识到它已经完全做好了自由的准备,我把盒子拿到外面,把鸟放在我的手掌里,带着复杂的感情轻轻地抚摸它。
Realising it was fully ready for freedom,I
with mixed feelings.
took the box outside,placed the bird in my palm and petted it softly
课堂应用
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2025八省联考)
I was in Philadelphia for a conference when I saw an ad in the hotel.A nearby theater was showing a documentary (纪录片) about several local animal shelters that were helping to save abandoned dogs across the country.I love animals,and I felt an urge to go to this fundraising event.However,none of my co-workers would go with me,and I was worried about walking on the street alone at night.
I resigned myself to spending the evening in my hotel room,but as soon as I got back to my room I felt restless and bored.The theater where the event was taking place was only about five blocks from the hotel,and the area around the hotel didn’t seem particularly dangerous.So,I decided to brave it.I gathered up my wallet and room key and set off.
It was already getting dark and the streets were nearly deserted.I managed to find the street the theater was on,but when I turned the corner,I stopped in shock.In front of the theater were a group of bikers—very big,tough-looking bikers.
I’ve known lots of motorcycle enthusiasts and most are nice people. However,in this case,I was a woman all alone,in a strange neighborhood,at night,and there were twenty or so very large men—all wearing insignia(徽章) that indicated they were in some sort of club—standing before me.Warning bells began to sound in my head,and my heart was pounding.Was I at the right theater Had I misread the date of the event
A sign outside the theater told me that I was in the right place on the right evening.Nevertheless,I wondered if I should rush back to my hotel instead of walking through that crowd of bikers.I finally decided that I would be safer inside the theater.Hopefully,the bikers would have gone away by the time the film was over.
注意:1.续写词数应为150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
I hurried into the theater,only to find there were even more bikers inside.
When the film began,I realized that the bikers were an animal rescue group.
I hurried into the theater,only to find there were even more bikers inside. My heart sank as I eyed the dark hall.The bikers’ leather jackets dominated the space.They seemed to fill every corner,chatting and laughing.I held my purse more tightly,trying to make myself as small as possible as I inched my way through them to buy a ticket.Their stares followed me,and I could feel my cheeks burning with nervousness.Every nerve urged me to run away,but I forced myself to stay,reminding myself of the documentary I’d come to see.
When the film began,I realized that the bikers were an animal rescue group.As the opening scenes flashed on the screen,showcasing the incredible efforts of local shelters,I saw the bikers around me nodding in approval,their faces softened with compassion.They were here for the same reason as I was. During the film,I caught bits of their chats about past rescues and future plans. In the end,my fear transformed into admiration.As we all filed out,we shared smiles and I was left with a newfound respect for these unlikely heroes. (共34张PPT)
专题六 读后续写
策略一 熟知评分标准
策略二 遵循3步解题
目 录 索 引
高考统计分析
卷别 年份 原文文体 主题 原文词数
主题语境 主题内容 全国一卷 2025 记叙文 人与自我 家庭聚会中与兄弟产生嫌隙 313
全国二卷 2025 记叙文 人与社会 留学生秋雨在爱尔兰因其 中文名发音面临的挑战 281
新课标 Ⅰ/Ⅱ卷 2024 记叙文 人与社会 与出租车司机的诚信之约 325
2023 记叙文 人与自我 老师帮助作者培养写作兴趣 318
命题趋势
1.引导思维品质培养
题目设计以真实生活情境为载体,2025年全国一卷选取家庭聚会因宠物引发矛盾的场景。续写要求学生把握兄弟矛盾及人与宠物的情感联结,厘清从聚会冲突、关系破裂到反思和解的情节逻辑,通过心理、动作等描写,展现对“换位思考”“情感共鸣”的深层思考,理解承担责任与宽容的可贵之处。此外,设题有较高的思维含量和开放的思考空间,有利于学生创造性思维的发展和培养,同时又引导学生在矛盾中挖掘人性温度。
2.坚定文化自信
2025年全国二卷设置了向外国同学解释中文姓名含义的情境,有助于学生在介绍中文姓名所蕴含的文化底蕴的过程中增强文化自信、提升跨文化交际的能力。语篇内容和提示语给了考生很大的发挥余地,学生可以充分调动发散思维和创新思维,突出对学生的跨文化意识和创新性思维的考查。
第1讲 破解读后续写2大策略
策略一 熟知评分标准
档次 评分标准解读
第五档 (21—25分) (1)创造了丰富、合理的内容,富有逻辑性,续写完整,与原文情境融洽度高;
(2)使用了多样并且恰当的词汇和语法结构,可能有个别小错,但完全不影响理解;
(3)有效地使用了语句间衔接手段,全文结构清晰,前后呼应,意义连贯。
第四档 (16-20分) (1)创造了比较丰富、合理的内容,比较有逻辑性,续写比较完整,与原文情境融洽度较高;
(2)使用了比较多样并且恰当的词汇和语法结构,可能有些许错误,但不影响理解;
(3)比较有效地使用了语句间衔接手段,全文结构比较清晰,意义比较连贯。
档次 评分标准解读
第三档 (11—15分) (1)创造了基本合理的内容,有一定的逻辑性,续写基本完整,与原文情境相关;
(2)使用了简单的词汇和语法结构,有一些错误或不恰当之处,但基本不影响理解;
(3)基本有效地使用了语句间衔接手段,全文结构基本清晰,意义基本连贯。
第二档 (6—10分) (1)内容或逻辑上有一些重大问题,续写不够完整,与原文情境有一定程度的脱节;
(2)所使用的词汇有限,语法结构单调,错误较多,影响理解;
(3)未能有效地使用语句间衔接手段,全文结构不够清晰,意义不够连贯。
档次 评分标准解读
第一档 (1—5分) (1)内容或逻辑上有较多重大问题,或有部分内容抄自原文,续写不完整,与原文情境基本脱节;
(2)所使用的词汇非常有限,语法结构单调,错误很多,严重影响理解;
(3)几乎没有使用语句间衔接手段,全文结构不清晰,意义不连贯。
0分 所写内容太少或无法看清以致无法评判;所写内容全部抄自原文或与题目要求完全不相关。未作答。
评分细则
1.本题总分为25分,按五个档次进行评分。
2.评分时,应主要从内容、词汇语法和篇章结构三个方面考虑,具体为:
(1)续写内容的质量、完整性以及与原文情境的融洽度;
(2)所使用词汇和语法结构的准确性、恰当性和多样性;
(3)上下文的衔接和全文的连贯性。
3.评分时,应先根据作答的整体情况确定其所属的档次,然后以该档次的要求来综合衡量,确定或调整档次,最后给分。
4.评分时还应注意:
(1)词数少于120的,酌情扣分;
(2)书写较差以致影响交际的,酌情扣分;
(3)单词拼写和标点符号是写作规范的重要方面,评分时应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑,英、美式拼写及词汇用法均可接受。
策略二 遵循3步解题
第一步 读文
读要素5W1H→who (人物)、when (时间)、where (地点)、what (事件)、why (起因)、how (结果)
第二步 构思
捕捉可续写点,巧妙照应衔接 在已定续写框架范围内,依据情节发展,推断人物的所见、所说、所思、所做、所感,在每段合理加入5-8个多角度的细节描写,同时,衔接自然流畅,语言生动具体。续写第一段通常是行文中的“转”或“高潮”,续写第二段是故事的圆满结局和感悟。 ①所见 环境/人物/活动场景描写 可借景抒情或融情于景 ②所说 简而有效的人物对话1~2句直接或间接引语 ③所思 内心活动描写 直接内心独白 ④所做 具体动作→肢体动作描写 ⑤所感
情感+神态细节描写
表现人物喜怒哀乐
第三步 成文
[典例印证] (2025全国一卷)
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
My wife and I wanted to share our new home with family and friends by hosting a small gathering in the early summer.She had prepared lots of snacks, while my job was to have the backyard in order.
There was plenty of space for the kids to run and play.There was just one thing I hadn’t counted on:My brother chose to bring his dog Toby,a 50-pound ball of fire.Though friendly,he could easily knock over my niece’s small boys and my six-month-old granddaughter.So,when my brother showed up,I asked him to watch Toby and keep him outside.
My plan was working out just fine.Toby was using up his energy by running back and forth in the backyard and giving the kids plenty of room. Unexpectedly,after supper,the weather changed.It started to rain and everyone went indoors.
It was an awkward moment.I didn’t want To by to be running around in the house,and my brother wasn’t happy with driving home with a wet dog. Eventually,my brother decided to leave rather than force the issue.
A few days passed,and I hadn’t heard anything from my brother.I texted him and expressed wishes for him to come out again.His reply came as a surprise—a shock,actually:“Not a chance.” Clearly,he was unhappy over the way we had parted.After all,I had left him little choice.Well,he’ll get over it,I reasoned.
Two months passed.My wife suggested I get in touch with my brother,but I resisted,thinking he should call first.However,my conscience(良心) kept bothering me.I tried to put myself in my brother’s shoes.He was facing health issues and his wife of thirty-five years had passed away a few months earlier. Toby was his constant companion,the one who kept him going.
注意:1.续写词数应为150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
I realized it was me who was at fault.
With the biscuits my wife had made,I arrived at my brother’s door.
第一步 读文
1.读要素5W1H
who(人物) I,my wife,my brother,my brother’s dog Toby
when(时间) After the early summer gathering,first a few days passed,then two months passed
where(地点) My new home
what(事件) A conflict over the dog arose due to the rain during the gathering,causing my brother to leave early.Afterwards,there was a rift between my brother and me,and two months later,I began to reflect on the matter.
why(起因) During the gathering,I was worried that the dog would knock over the children,so I asked my brother to keep Toby outside and watch over him.When it rained,I didn’t want Toby to run around in the house,which left my brother with no choice but to leave,thus making him unhappy.
how(结果) ...
2.理双线
第二步 构思
1.两段首句定一框
(1)确定主要内容
根据续写第一段提示句“I realized it was me who was at fault.”(“我”意识到我错了。)可知,续写第一段可先写作者反思自己在聚会上只顾控制局面,忽视了Toby对弟弟的重要性。
再结合续写第二段提示句“With the biscuits my wife had made,I arrived at my brother’s door.”(带着我妻子做的饼干,我来到了我弟弟的门前。)可知,续写第一段还应描写“我”妻子递给我饼干,我决定带着饼干登门道歉。
(2)捕捉可续写点
①What did I remember
②Why was Toby important to my brother
③What did my wife hand me
④What did I decide to do
2.二框二首正能量
(1)确定主要内容
根据续写第二段提示句以及上面的分析可知,续写第二段应该说明弟弟开门时的冷淡,我道歉后弟弟脸色变得柔和了。文章最后应写“我”经历此事后的感悟,明白了亲情修复的意义,升华主旨。
(2)捕捉可续写点
①What did my hands do when I knocked
②How did my brother feel when he opened the door
③What did Toby do
④How did I apologize to my brother
⑤Did my brother’s emotion change
第三步 成文
I realized it was me who was at fault.I remembered my brother’s sad face when he left in the rain.He had lost his wife and felt very lonely.Toby wasn’t just a pet—he was my brother’s only true friend.I felt terrible about making them leave.When my wife handed me warm biscuits,my brother’s favorite,I knew I needed to fix my mistake.“I’ll go to him,” I said,holding the biscuits tightly.
With the biscuits my wife had made,I arrived at my brother’s door.My hands shook as I knocked.My brother opened the door,his face cold.But suddenly Toby rushed out,wagging his tail and jumping up happily!“I’m sorry,” I said quickly.“Toby should be with our family.” I offered the biscuits.My brother’s eyes softened.He patted Toby’s head and sighed.“Come inside,” he said quietly.Toby pushed us together,and I knew we were finally on the path to healing.
课堂应用
运用三步法完成下列读后续写:
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2025浙江1月卷)
Kevin was pretty bored.His mother was at work,and his father had been away on business.Therefore,he was left in the care of Mrs.Hill,an old lady who lived next door.His parents had raised the 12-year-old to be a good boy.He never got into trouble,though sometimes he wanted to do risky things.Mrs.Hill was asleep.Kevin sighed(叹息) and hoped something exciting would happen. Suddenly,a movement outside caught his eye.
Mrs.Hill’s front window faced Mr.and Mrs.Green’s house across the street.The couple had both gone to work,so it was strange that someone was over there.Kevin stared at the man at their front door.Suddenly,the man jumped through an open window into the house.With his heart in his mouth, Kevin grabbed Mrs.Hill’s home phone and called the police.
Thinking that the man might get away with whatever he wanted before the police arrived,Kevin decided to do something.He rushed out of Mrs.Hill’s house and crossed the street quickly.Grabbing a branch from a cut-down tree,he jumped in through the window.“Stop right there!You must leave right now!” he called out,holding the branch with both hands.
The man froze for a second,but when he saw the skinny boy he breathed a sigh of relief.“Hey,kid,put that down.It was my home.My parents used to live here and my father’s watch was here,” he explained,trying to lift a floorboard.
At that moment,the sounds of a police car echoed(回响) in the air.The man stood up in a panic,then ran through the house toward the window and jumped out.Kevin followed out and told the arriving police officers what had happened.They pursued and arrested the man.
Kevin went back to Mrs.Hill’s house.Somehow he wasn’t sure he had done the right thing.“What if he has told the truth ” he thought to himself.The man’s words sounded pretty convincing.
注意:1.续写词数应为150左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
When Mr.and Mrs.Green got home,Kevin went to talk to them.
Kevin and Mr.Green took the watch they had found to the police station.
When Mr.and Mrs.Green got home,Kevin went to talk to them.He explained how he had witnessed the strange man entering their house and how he was arrested.Mr.and Mrs.Green listened attentively,with a mixture of surprise and gratitude on their faces.Mrs.Green hugged Kevin,thanking him for his bravery.Mr.Green,however,looked thoughtful.He asked Kevin to describe the man in detail and then revealed that the man was indeed his younger brother,who had come to retrieve a watch their father had left behind. Kevin’s eyes widened in shock.
Kevin and Mr.Green took the watch they had found to the police station. On the way,Mr.Green explained that the watch was a family heirloom,passed down from generation to generation.At the police station,they explained the situation to the officers,who were surprised but understanding.The man,who was released after his identity was verified,was waiting outside.He smiled weakly at Kevin,who felt a mix of embarrassment and relief.Mr.Green handed over the watch to his brother with a pat on the back,and they both agreed to keep in touch.Kevin learned an important lesson that day:Always verify the facts before taking action,but never hesitate to help those in need. (共115张PPT)
第5讲 分门别类,突破4大主题语境
热考话题一 人与自我——家庭亲情
热考话题二 人与自我——成长蜕变
目 录 索 引
热考话题三 人与社会——历险脱困
热考话题四 人与社会——守望互助
热考话题一 人与自我——家庭亲情
家庭亲情类话题是高考读后续写的热考话题。2021年新高考卷的读后续写话题是为妈妈准备母亲节早餐,对应《普通高中英语课程标准》中个人、家庭、社区及学校生活这一主题语境。它一方面引导我们孝敬父母,另一方面提倡我们在家养成动手和做家务的好习惯,培养独立生活的技能。
【思维建模】
一、谋好篇——续写情节安排
二、写好句——细节佳句积累
(一)冲突设置
1.与父亲吵架后决定离家出走
“Why do I have to get your permission I am already 18 and I’m not a kid any more!”I said to Dad angrily and rushed to my bedroom,shutting the door violently (冲进我的卧室,猛地关上门).Blinded by anger (被愤怒蒙蔽了双眼),I found that I could not stay at my hometown any longer.Late that night,I slipped out of the house (偷偷溜出家) and decided to take the bus to the railway station to start my own life as far away from my home as possible (在离家尽可能远的地方开始自己的生活).
情节走向:我和父亲吵架→冲进卧室,猛地关上门→愤怒使我无法留下→半夜溜出家,决定离家出走
2.妈妈忘记我的生日
To send my sister to college,Mother bought a used typewriter,preparing to change her job for a better-paid one.As soon as the table was cleared and the dishes were done,Mother would disappear into her study to practice typing (躲进书房练习打字).She was so lost in her typing that she forgot my birthday (沉迷于打字,以至于忘记我的生日).Feeling annoyed,I began to hate the typewriter.
情节走向:妈妈买了个二手打字机→她一收拾好桌子、洗好碗,就去练习打字→妈妈忘记我的生日→我很生气
(二)冲突化解
1.吵架后,女儿向父亲道歉
To my surprise,my father was sitting by the dining table alone.With his face buried in his hands (他双手捂着脸),he looked tired and defeated.I approached him slowly and sat beside him.Tears welled up in my eyes(我的泪水夺眶而出) as I tried to apologize for my rudeness.“Dad,I’m sorry for what I said and did.” He looked up,his eyes filled with the mixture of surprise and sadness (他的眼睛里充满了惊讶和悲伤).Without a word,we embraced each other tightly (紧紧相拥),feeling the melting away of the iron door.That night we talked so much,which was also a turning point in our relationship (我们关系的转折点).
情节走向:父亲独自坐在餐桌旁→他双手捂着脸,疲惫且沮丧→我哭着向父亲道歉→他抬起头,惊讶且悲伤→我们紧紧相拥→我们谈论了很多,关系转折
2.妈妈重获孩子的信任
Emily was determined to change the present situation (决心改变现状) and regain the trust of the kids.When kids got back from school,they found their favourite snacks on the table again,beside which stood their mum,with the familiar loving smile on her face (她脸上带着熟悉的充满爱意的微笑). “Welcome home,girls.Time for snacks and tell me what’s fun in school today!” Seeing the uncertainty in the kids’ eyes,Emily apologized for being so unreasonable (为自己的无理道歉) in the past few weeks.“It’s OK,mum,” said the kids.“We understand whatever you do is out of concern for us.” With a ripple of warmth surging through her body,Emily gathered her sweeties into her arms (Emily感到一股暖流在她身体里涌动,紧紧地把孩子们抱在怀里).
情节走向:Emily决心改变现状,重获孩子们的信任→Emily给孩子准备零食,请她们分享学校趣事→Emily为自己的无理道歉→孩子们谅解妈妈→Emily 拥抱孩子们
(三)亲情升华
1.爱护和关心你所爱的人
Love and care for the one you love every single day of your life.You may think what you did is just a small deed,but it may mean a lot.Some relations are made to last longer but they still need to be nurtured with love and care (需要用爱和关怀来滋养).
2.父母的重要性
Parents will always be there and do everything they could just to make you happy.We take them for granted,and we don’t appreciate what they do for us until it’s too late.When you find a path of success in your life,carry on but don’t leave your parents behind as they are the true reason for your success (别丢下你的父母,因为他们是你成功的真正原因).
3.家庭关系
①Since then,we have become the closest friends,genuinely listening to one another and truly enjoying each other’s company (真诚地倾听彼此,真正地享受彼此的陪伴).
②The special bond between parents and their child is like a knotted long rope that can never be untied forever (就像一根打结的长绳,永远无法解开).
③Hugging him tightly,the mother knew that her son would taste the bitter sweetness in his chocolates (尝到巧克力中苦甜参半的滋味).
④It was Henry’s kindness that made me feel the warmth of our family.I will treasure it with all my heart (我将用心珍惜它).
⑤The warm golden sunlight,flooding in through the window,together with love between my family,warmed us (透过窗户涌进来的温暖的金色阳光和我家人之间的爱,温暖了我们).
[典题印证]
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2021新课标Ⅰ&Ⅱ卷)
A MOTHER’S DAY SURPRISE
The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mother’s Day.How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed.They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge.They had watched their mother in the kitchen.There was nothing to it.Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do.
The big day came at last.The alarm rang at 6 a.m.The pair went down the stairs quietly to the kitchen.They decided to boil the porridge first.They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made the French toast.Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk.Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture.Next,Jeff turned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan.Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread.The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within seconds.Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread.This time,she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely.
Then Jeff noticed steam shooting out of the pot and the lid starting to shake.The next minute,the porridge boiled over and put out the fire.Jenna panicked.Thankfully,Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas quickly.But the stove was a mess now.Jenna told Jeff to clean it up so they could continue to cook the rest of the porridge.But Jeff’s hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain.Jenna made him put his hand in cold water.Then she caught the smell of burning.Oh dear!The piece of bread in the pan had turned black as well.
注意:1.续写词数应为150左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
As the twins looked around them in disappointment,their father appeared.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up.
[分步解读指导]
Step 1 抓核心线索,理故事脉络
人物 Jenna & Jeff (twins),mother,father 时间 on Mother’s Day
地点 at home
冲突/矛盾 双胞胎杰夫和詹娜计划为他们的妈妈做早餐,希望给她惊喜,结果手忙脚乱,事与愿违,厨房一片狼藉 文章主题 亲情、爱、温馨、难忘的母亲节
故事线索 (起)双胞胎杰夫和詹娜计划为他们的母亲做早餐作为母亲节惊喜→(承)一切都很顺利,直到杰夫烧焦了第一块面包→(承)粥溢出了,杰夫的手触摸了热炉,另一块面包变黑了→(转)他们的父亲出现了→(合)这对双胞胎把早餐带给了他们的母亲 Step 2 衔接升华句,初建续写模型
Step 3 思伏笔添细节,原续更融洽
捕捉原文所设伏笔,充盈过渡句细节并合理衔接,以使续写段落在逻辑和内容上更符合原文基调。
原文伏笔点 过渡句中可与伏笔衔接的细节
标题A MOTHER’S DAY SURPRISE 续写第二段可写妈妈看到早餐时的惊喜
首段How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed. 续写第二段可写妈妈看到早餐被端到床前时的快乐
原文二、三段中叙述面包煎煳了,粥溢出了,厨房一片狼藉 续写第一段可写父亲建议双胞胎收拾厨房
原文伏笔点 过渡句中可与伏笔衔接的细节
尾段Jenna told Jeff to clean it up so they could continue to cook the rest of the porridge. 续写第一段可写父亲如何处理这锅没煮好的粥
尾段But Jeff’s hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain. 续写第二段可写母亲看到杰夫的手,落下泪来
特定物品 pot,pan,eggs,milk 续写第一段可写孩子们和父亲再次做早餐的场景
Step 4 沿原文特点,写“3好”表达(准确、丰富、地道)
原文对做早餐的动作描写细腻,体现出即使简单的早餐,倘若不熟练,也会有很大的麻烦。在描写做早餐时,利用场景描写表现双胞胎由最初的自信到最后的不自信和沮丧,使描述极具画面感;利用间接引语呈现人物对话。续写时应学会借鉴和仿效,这样才能与原文语言风格保持一致。
佳作赏析
As the twins looked around them in disappointment,their father appeared. Seeing the mess in the kitchen,their father was stunned,asking what the twins were doing.[1](衔接句④)“Today is Mother’s Day and we are preparing a breakfast for mom as a surprise,”said the twins.Moved by their sweet idea[2], their father decided to offer them possible help.Not only did he clean the stove for them,but also he gave patient guidance to them.[3]With their father’s help, the kids soon finished French toast and chicken porridge.(结尾句③)
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. Waking up from her dream,their mother was still trying to figure out what had happened.[4](衔接句⑤) “Happy Mother’s Day and this is our surprise for you!” said the twins excitedly.Looking at their lovely faces and the breakfast they had made,their mother burst into tears.Holding the kids tightly in her arms,she said,“You are the biggest surprise that I can ever have in my life.”[5](结尾句①) Had it not been for this special experience,she might not have realized how much her children loved her.[6](升华句②)
亮句解读
[1]“现在分词作状语+宾语从句”描写了父亲看到混乱场景时的惊讶。
[2]过去分词作状语描写了父亲得知原因后的感动。
[3]部分倒装句描写了父亲帮助双胞胎的场景。
[4]现在分词作状语描写了妈妈刚睡醒时的茫然。
[5]“现在分词作状语+动作+语言”描写了妈妈得知真相后的感动。
[6]虚拟语气表达出了妈妈的心理活动。
课堂应用
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2025河南联盟高三模拟预测)
Police chief Matthew Bruce’s son,Adam,came late into his lives,so he always spoiled him and never said no to him for anything.As Adam grew older, he began to take his parents’ love and concern for granted,as if it were permission for him to do whatever he pleased.There were certainly times when he was criticized for bad grades or sneaking out of the house,but that was limited to only minor blame.Adam thought that if he pretended to be an “ideal” son,he would have to face absolutely no blame from his parents.So he began to act like a good son in front of them while engaging in all sorts of wrongdoing behind their backs,such as breaking the law.However,Adam always got away with it.
One day,Adam was driving back from a party with his friend Freddie when he began over-speeding.Freddie warned him to slow down,but Adam didn’t listen.Adam’s driving worried Freddie.He asked Adam to slow down again,and when Adam didn’t,he grabbed the steering wheel himself,causing the car to slide off the road and run into a tree on the side.Then they heard the alarm of a police car behind them.The car came to a stop in front of them,and a police officer approached them.
“I’ve been following your car for a while now,and I’m afraid I’ll have to take you to the station for speeding.May I have your driver’s license first ” the police officer said.
Freddie was scared.“Here’s my driver’s license,sir,” he said,offering it to the officer.Adam tried to explain that he was the police chief’s son,but the police officer turned a deaf ear to him.He drove him to the station,and when Adam stepped inside,he was surprised to see his father there.He had been called to the station for an urgent case.
注意:1.续写词数应为150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
Adam felt no worries and thought he was out of trouble.
He told Adam he would need to earn money himself to pay for the fine.
Adam felt no worries and thought he was out of trouble.He began begging his father to let him go and promised not to repeat the same mistake. At this point,Adam thought his father would talk about his case privately to him,and he’d get away with it as he always did,but to his disappointment,his father wouldn’t let him off the hook this time.Bruce decided to teach him a lesson.To be specific,he wanted his son to go to trial and be fined.
He told Adam he would need to earn money himself to pay for the fine.In the end,Adam had to have a part-time job to pay off the fine.When Adam was finally freed from the fine,he didn’t stop working.After working hard for the money,he realized how hard it was to earn money and do something independently.He promised his parents that he would always obey them and would not break the law any more,which made his parents very happy.That experience did teach him a lesson and change Adam for the better.
热考话题二 人与自我——成长蜕变
2021年6月浙江卷通过个人薪水话题,强调个人成长和对劳动的认识。2022年新高考卷讲了戴维克服障碍,战胜自我,最终参加比赛的故事。2023年新课标卷讲了作者在老师的鼓励下参加写作比赛,最终获奖的故事。2024年1月浙江卷讲述把大目标分成若干个小目标,然后一个接一个地去解决问题。
【思维建模】
一、谋好篇——续写情节安排
二、写好句——细节佳句积累
(一)成长前的烦恼
1.自我怀疑
As I walked into the classroom,my heart raced with nervousness (我因紧张心跳加速).I couldn’t shake the feeling (无法摆脱这种感觉) that my classmates were judging me,and I struggled to find my place among them. Doubts and insecurity hovered in my mind (怀疑和不安全感在我的脑海中盘旋),making it difficult for me to focus on anything else.The fear of rejection weighed heavily on my shoulders,causing me to doubt every decision I made (导致我对自己的每一个决定都产生怀疑).
情节走向:走进教室,心跳加速→感到同学们在评判我→心中充满怀疑和不安全感→无法专注于其他事情→怀疑自己的每一个决定
2.负面情绪
I burst out of the door (冲出门),tears streaming down my cheeks (眼泪顺着脸颊流淌).Before Mom stopped me,I stormed into my room and slammed the door shut (砰地关上了门) behind me.I threw myself down on the bed (扑到床上)and my body was shaking with sobs (身子随着哭泣抖动)and I buried my face in the pillow (把脸埋进枕头里).
情节走向:我冲出门,泪流满面→冲进房间关上门→扑到床上哭起来
(二)成长中的经历
1.勇敢坚定促蜕变
To everyone’s joy,he reached the final line and ranked the 20th.It was no more important whether he won first place or not (他是否赢得第一名不再重要).It was his bravery and strong faith that made something unusual happen finally (正是他的勇敢和坚定的信念最终使一些不同寻常的事情发生了).He conquered his fears and broke the physical and mental barriers (突破了身心障碍) that had once held him back.
情节走向:他到达终点→是否赢得第一名不再重要→勇敢和坚定的信念让不同寻常的事情发生了→他克服了恐惧并突破了身心障碍
2.战胜恐惧促蜕变
The crowd watched in awe,their applause and cheer resounding in the hall (掌声和欢呼声回荡在大厅里).Facing the overwhelming response (面对极其强烈的反应),I knew that I had conquered my fears.Yes,the unexpected discouragement can be a blessing if we have belief in ourselves (相信自己) and never give up our dreams (永不放弃梦想).
情节走向:人们鼓掌并欢呼→我战胜了自己的恐惧→相信自己,永不放弃梦想
3.积极心态促蜕变
Participating in this long-distance race posed a tremendous challenge (构成极大的挑战) for David.He understood that he needed to overcome not only his physical limitations but also the psychological fears that held him back.Nevertheless,he chose to confront these obstacles head-on (选择直面这些障碍) rather than shy away from them.He began to enjoy the challenge (开始享受这个挑战),enjoying the opportunity to test his limits and prove to himself what he was truly capable of achieving.
情节走向:参加比赛是一个极大的挑战→需要克服身体和心理上的障碍→选择直面障碍→开始享受挑战
(三)成长后的感悟
1.Now,I am proud of what I look like and much happier,because I have realized it is your personality that decides who you truly are (你的个性决定你真正的样子).
2.If you are still trapped in the worry,do not be depressed but let the thing go and try to challenge yourself (让事情过去,试着挑战自己) right now.
3.Not until then did I realize that difficulties are an important part of life and that they can actually serve as valuable opportunities for growth and self-improvement (成为成长和自我提升的宝贵机会).
4.The journey to success is not smooth (通往成功的道路不是平坦的).It is full of challenges and difficulties,which we should be brave to face (我们应该勇敢面对).As long as we don’t give up and make every effort to overcome all the difficulties,we will achieve our goal(s) finally.
5.It’s never too late to go for your dreams (追逐你的梦想).As long as you grasp every opportunity (抓住每个机会) and take full advantage of it,you will stand a chance to realize your dreams (实现你的梦想).
6.Determination and optimism are what it takes to conquer your fear and accomplish your goal(s) (决心和乐观是克服你的恐惧和实现你的目标所需要的).
[典题印证] (2023新课标Ⅰ & Ⅱ卷)
When I was in middle school,my social studies teacher asked me to enter a writing contest,I said no without thinking.I did not love writing.My family came from Brazil,so English was only my second language.Writing was so difficult and painful for me that my teacher had allowed me to present my paper on the sinking of the Titanic by acting out a play,where I played all the parts.No one laughed harder than he did.
So,why did he suddenly force me to do something at which I was sure to fail His reply:“Because I love your stories.If you’re willing to apply yourself,I think you have a good shot at this.”Encouraged by his words,I agreed to give it a try.
I chose Paul Revere’s horse as my subject.Paul Revere was a silversmith(银匠) in Boston who rode a horse at night on April 18,1775 to Lexington to warn people that British soldiers were coming.My story would come straight from the horse’s mouth.Not a brilliant idea,but funny,and unlikely to be anyone else’s choice.
What did the horse think,as he sped through the night Did he get tired Have doubts Did he want to quit I sympathized immediately.I got tired.I had doubts.I wanted to quit.But,like Revere’s horse,I kept going.I worked hard.I checked my spelling.I asked my older sister to correct my grammar.I checked out a half-dozen books on Paul Revere from the library.I even read a few of them.
When I handed in the essay to my teacher,he read it,laughed out loud and said,“Great.Now,write it again.” I wrote it again,and again and again.When I finally finished it,the thought of winning had given way to the enjoyment of writing.If I didn’t win,I wouldn’t care.
注意:1.续写词数应为150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
A few weeks later,when I almost forgot the contest,there came the news.
I went to my teacher’s office after the award presentation.
[分步解读指导]
Step 1 抓核心线索,理故事脉络
人物 I:creative,diligent,enjoyable,determined my social studies teacher:caring,optimistic 时间 when I was in middle school→
a few weeks later
地点 in middle school→in my teacher’s office
冲突/矛盾 如何从抵触英语写作转变为享受写作 文章主题 努力克服困难,实现个人成长
故事线索 (起)以英语为第二语言的“我”不喜欢英语写作→(承)“我”宁愿表演也不愿意尝试写作→(转)老师鼓励“我”参赛,“我”答应一试→(承)选定写作主题,遭遇困难不放弃,克服困难一直努力→(转)“我”享受写作的乐趣,不在乎是否得奖→(合)比赛获奖,事件感悟 Step 2 衔接升华句,初建续写模型
Step 3 思伏笔添细节,原续更融洽
捕捉原文所设伏笔,充盈过渡句细节并合理衔接,以使续写段落在逻辑和内容上更符合原文基调。
原文伏笔点 过渡句中可与伏笔衔接的细节
Para.1 English was only my second language. 续写第一段可添加情节叙述:“我”是唯一一个母语不是英语的获奖者
Para.1 No one laughed harder than he did. Para.5 ...he read it,laughed out loud and said→老师高兴时的大笑 续写第一段可添加神态细节:老师得知“我”获奖后高兴地大笑
原文伏笔点 过渡句中可与伏笔衔接的细节
Para.2 ...why did he suddenly force me to do something... Para.2 Encouraged by his words,I agreed to give it a try.→老师的鼓励 续写第二段可添加细节:“我”感激老师激励自己参加写作比赛和对自己不断的鼓励
Para.5 the thought of winning had given way to the enjoyment of writing 续写第二段可添加语言细节:“我”告诉老师自己爱上了写作
必要事物:原文中的作者参赛作品中的“马” 续写第一段可添加“我”脑海中浮现出努力创作马的形象的情节
Step 4 沿原文特点,写“3好”表达(准确、丰富、地道)
原文长短句交替使用,恰到好处地推动了情节的发展,如作者在描写自己的努力过程时,使用了一系列的排比短句,淋漓尽致地描写了作者纠结、怀疑、想放弃又坚持下去的写稿过程;运用“时间状语从句+动作链”描写老师的动作;利用一般疑问句和特殊疑问句描写内心活动。在叙述事情发展时,利用了状语从句、定语从句和比较级句式等。续写时应学会借鉴和仿效,这样才能与原文语言风格保持一致。
佳作赏析
A few weeks later,when I almost forgot the contest,there came the news.I won first place!(衔接句④) So overwhelmed with excitement and disbelief was I that my heart was pounding quickly.[1]Finally came the big day!When my name was announced,I walked onto the stage against wild cheers and thunderous applause.[2]Feeling extremely excited and proud,I accepted the prize,a symbol and recognition of my past perseverance and hard work.[3] Thinking about this,I shed tears of gratitude,as there was one special person who meant a lot to me.[4](结尾句③)
I went to my teacher’s office after the award presentation. “Congratulations!I knew you would win,” he said,hugging me tightly.(衔接句⑤)“Thank you.I wouldn’t be what I am today without your encouragement.” A sense of gratitude welled up in the bottom of my heart.[5] Patting my shoulder,he smiled,“It is your efforts that count most.” From then on,I began to bury myself in English writing.(结尾句①)With my teacher’s inspiration,I determined to keep on challenging myself and embrace a better me.(升华句②)
亮句解读
[1]倒装句生动地表达了“我”获奖时的激动心情。
[2]生动的语言和细致的动作描写出了颁奖时激动人心的场景。
[3]现在分词作状语+名词短语作同位语,描写出了“我”领奖时的兴奋和自豪的心情。
[4]现在分词作状语+高级表达+状语从句,描写出了“我”对老师的感激。
[5]无灵主语句描写出了“我”对老师深深的感激之情。
[吸睛收尾] 本文采取的是“自然式结尾”,即故事讲述完毕,文章自然结束,这样的结尾简单明了,朴素自然,使文章结构显得十分完整,但并不“草率”。本文用“With my teacher’s inspiration,I determined to keep on challenging myself and embrace a better me.”这句话顺其自然地结束故事,同时也表明了这件事给作者带来的影响,给读者留下了回味的空间。
课堂应用
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2025安徽高三联考)
We had a garden in our backyard and I always watered the flowers together with my little sister,Laynie.She had her own watering cans and small shovels so she could “work” with me.One day,I showed her how to grow flowers:Dig a hole.Put in a few seeds.Cover them up with dirt.Water them every two or three days.
“See,Laynie,” I explained to her.“Beautiful flowers will grow from these tiny seeds in a few months.”
The next day,after everything was watered,she ran to the fence and started watering another spot.I walked over and saw some fresh dirt near the fence.
“Did you plant something here ” I asked.
“Yes,” she said.“I’m growing a pencil.My pencil got too short,so I planted it.”
“But...”
I wanted to laugh and tell her the truth,but I changed my mind and said,“Uh...I had never tried that before.”
Late in the evening when Laynie was asleep,I dug up the short pencil and “planted” a brand-new one.Laynie was really excited when she dug it up the next morning.
“My pencil grew!” she shouted.
A few days later,Laynie was watering on the same spot.One day later, new crayons stuck their pointy little heads out,thanks to me.
“My crayons grew,too!” Laynie yelled,jumping up and down.
Next,Laynie grew an adult bear doll from a tiny one,a soup spoon from a teaspoon,and a hand mirror from a piece of glass.When she claimed that she had grown these things,I just kept my mouth shut!Actually,it was fun trying to think of what should grow from Laynie’s magic “seeds”.And it was cool to see her get excited.
One morning,I saw her carrying our little gold fish to the fence.I knew immediately what she was going to do and rushed to its rescue.
“How long does it take to grow a big goldfish ” she asked me seriously.
注意:1.续写词数应为150左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
I couldn’t answer her question immediately.
“No!”my baby sister screamed and burst into tears.
I couldn’t answer her question immediately.Knowing the truth would disappoint her a lot,I hesitated for a while,“Should I tell her the truth or keep my mouth shut ”Upon thinking the goldfish would die due to my silence,a sense of guilt rose up in my heart.Thus I made up my mind to tell her what had happened in fact.I rushed into my room and took out all the “seeds”.With the “seeds” lying on the ground,I explained to her what I did.Hearing my words, my baby sister’s eyes widened in disbelief.
“No!” my baby sister screamed and burst into tears.I looked into her eyes, and said,“I’m so sorry,my dear sister.Please forgive me...” She understood what was going on in a moment and stopped crying.I had expected her complaints because I had lied to her.To my surprise,she didn’t blame me. Instead,she walked toward me,wrapped her arms around my neck and said, “Thank you for what you did for me.” She knew it was a white lie.Tears began to form in my eyes.From then on,we watered the flowers together and a few months later,the flowers were in full bloom.Seeing the beautiful flowers,we were filled with a sense of excitement and achievement.The months’ effort taught my sister nothing could grow up overnight,even the seeds.Instead,it takes time and care for seeds to grow into flowers.What matters more is that we became closer and a magic seed of love was sown in our hearts.
热考话题三 人与社会——历险脱困
历险脱困类是高考读后续写常涉及的话题,如2017年浙江卷的骑车游玩遇狼脱险、 2018年浙江卷的父子骑马迷路和2020年浙江卷的拍摄北极熊遇险。此类话题的写作旨在倡导人们直面困境、永不放弃。
【思维建模】
一、谋好篇——续写情节安排
二、写好句——细节佳句积累
(一)获救之前
1.Terrified,I slowly kept walking (我吓坏了,慢慢地继续走).Suddenly,one dog dashed towards me,sinking his teeth into my leg.I let out a scream of pain (疼得大叫一声) as I felt his teeth in my flesh.I picked up a rock to fight him off,but feared that he would go for my neck or that the other one would come to attack me together.Facing these two aggressive dogs,I felt at a loss (面对这两只恶犬,我感到不知所措).Hardly could I step out of the trouble on my own.
情节走向:我很害怕,缓慢移动→突然一只狗咬住我的腿→我疼得大叫→我想反击,又担心另一只狗袭来→我不知所措
2.The sky started to become dark.I didn’t know what to do,so I called out to my classmates but there was no reply (大声叫我的同学,但没有回应).I tried to find a way but none of the scenes seemed familiar (想找条路,但没有一个场景看起来熟悉).I walked for a few more minutes,hoping to meet other people behind,but once again it didn’t work.I was scared,hungry and helpless (我感到害怕、饥饿和无助).
情节走向:天变黑→我不知道做什么,呼喊同学无果→寻找出路失败→继续走,想遇到其他人,但没成功→感到害怕、无助
(二)获救过程
1.She started yelling,“Back up!Back up!She needs space!” She pulled Simmons out of the back seat (从后座上拉出Simmons),avoiding broken glass from the window.Then she checked his pulse on the neck and put her head against Simmons’ chest (检查了他脖子上的脉搏,然后把头靠在Simmons的胸口).Then she started doing CPR immediately (开始立即抢救).
情节走向:她大叫让人后退留出空间→把Simmons从后座上拉出来→为Simmons检查→立即进行抢救
2.Luckily,we walked out of the deep forest before it was too dark (天黑之前走出森林) and the boy was rushed to the nearest hospital (男孩被快速送往最近的医院) where everything was ready for surgery.Now,he has recovered from that unlucky hike (从那次不幸的徒步旅行中恢复过来).
情节走向:天黑之前走出森林→男孩被快速送往医院→现已康复
3.To my delight,Sam,my loyal friend,remained by my side (陪在我身边). Sam helped lift me up timely (及时帮助我浮起来) whenever he saw me beginning to sink.He kept me company all the time (一直陪伴着我) and we were swimming neck and neck (我们并驾齐驱游泳).To be frank,without Sam’s company and help,I would have given up a long time ago.
情节走向:山姆陪在我身边→及时帮助我浮起来→他一直陪着我→我们并驾齐驱游泳
(三)获救之后
1.Eventually,we went out of the forest that trapped us.What an unforgettable experience!It turns out that there’s always a way out of any difficult situation as long as we stay calm.
最后,我们走出了困住我们的森林。这是一次多么难忘的经历啊!事实证明,只要我们保持冷静,就总有办法摆脱困境。
2.We have learned from the incident that life is valuable and the skill of saving life is more valuable.
我们从这起事件中学到:生命是宝贵的,拯救生命的技能更有价值。
3.Only then did I realize that it was bravery that can conquer whatever difficulty came in the way.
直到那时我才意识到,勇敢可以克服一切困难。
[典题印证]
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
I was backpacking and planned to climb a volcano called Baru Volcano. At 3,474 meters,it is the only place on Earth from where you can see the Atlantic and the Pacific Oceans at the same time.
I set off before sunrise.It was a little cold,so I had pulled on tights under my trousers.I intended to reach the top by midday,and then return before dark to get a lift to my hotel.I always felt safe travelling as a woman on my own, which I’d done since my 20s.I love the freedom.When I got to the base of the volcano at 7 in the morning,the ranger(护林员) disagreed to let me go alone, but said OK because an American couple were behind me.
The first part of the climb was beautiful.It was not dry as you might imagine a volcano might be—there were trees and flowers all around,and a dirt road for the farmers who worked around there.I walked for an hour and reached a fair height.The views were impressive,so I stopped to take a photograph.
Suddenly I heard violent barking behind me.I turned and saw two dogs running aggressively towards me.I expected them to stop,but they didn’t.As they got closer,I could see their teeth looked sharp,and that they looked angry. There was nowhere for me to run.I tried to keep calm,but my heart was racing. I’d never been bitten by a dog,and I couldn’t help but fear what would happen. They stopped a dozen feet from where I stood and kept barking.I knew they could move fast,so I didn’t want to try to outrun them.
注意:1.续写词数应为150左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
Terrified,I slowly kept walking,saying,“Come on,good dogs!”
Just at this critical moment,a pickup appeared,driven by the ranger.
[分步解读指导]
Step 1 抓核心线索,厘故事脉络
人物 I:adventurous the ranger:responsible two dogs:fierce 地点 on the way up the mountain
冲突/矛盾 被凶猛的狗攻击,求生 文章主题 遇险、求生
情节线 (起)“我”独自一人爬山→(承)护林员劝阻→(承)美国夫妇在后,因而成行→(承)“我”欣赏美景、拍照→(转)“我”突然遇到两只凶猛的狗→(承)“我”尝试自救未果→(承)护林员及时出现并施救→(合)“我”获救并继续登山 Step 2 五句定位,建续写框架
Step 3 思伏笔添细节,原续更融洽
捕捉原文所设伏笔,充盈过渡句细节并合理衔接,以使续写段落在逻辑和内容上更符合原文基调。
原文伏笔点 过渡句中可与伏笔衔接的细节
Para.4 Suddenly I heard violent barking behind me.I turned and saw two dogs running aggressively towards me.I expected them to stop,but they didn’t. 续写第一段可添加描写狗继续凶猛狂吠不肯离去的场景
Para.4 I tried to keep calm,but my heart was racing.I’d never been bitten by a dog,and I couldn’t help but fear what would happen. 续写第一段可添加“我”见狗继续狂叫后紧张、害怕的心理描写
原文伏笔点 过渡句中可与伏笔衔接的细节
Para.2 When I got to the base of the volcano at 7 in the morning,the ranger (护林员) disagreed to let me go alone... 续写第二段可添加护林员再次提醒“我”自己一个人旅行要注意安全的语言描写
Para.2 I always felt safe travelling as a woman on my own,which I’d done since my 20s.I love the freedom. 续写第二段主旨升华可回扣此句,表达生命最重要
Step 4 沿原文特点,写3好表达(准确、丰富、地道)
原文使用了多变的高级句式和生动的场景描写,恰到好处地推动了情节的发展,如运用了which引导的非限制性定语从句介绍“我”自以为独自一人爬山很安全的心理,运用了现在分词作宾语补足语描写“我”看到两条狗狂吠的可怕场景,运用了多个并列句描写狗的凶猛以及“我”看到狗的心理。续写时应学会借鉴和仿效,这样才能与原文语言风格保持一致。
佳作赏析
Terrified,I slowly kept walking,saying,“Come on,good dogs!” The dogs continued to bark and growl as if they wanted to swallow me.(衔接句④) My heart pounded violently in my chest.Afraid of being attacked at any moment,I struggled to remain calm and tried to think of a way to defend myself if necessary.[1] Suddenly,my backpack came to my mind,which could be used as a barrier[2].However,as I reached for it,one of the dogs aggressively rushed to me.(结尾句③)
Just at this critical moment,a pickup appeared,driven by the ranger.Seeing the state I was in,he immediately honked his horn,scaring the dogs away. (衔接句⑤) I breathed a deep sigh of relief as I watched the dogs disappear into the distance.[3] Without the ranger’s rescue,things could have turned out much worse.[4] I extended my sincere gratitude to him,as he earnestly reminded me that safety comes first while people are travelling.I was much more cautious as I continued my climb up the volcano.(结尾句①) After all,nothing is more precious than life.[5](升华句②)
亮句解读
[1]运用了pounded violently,struggled等生动的表达和形容词短语作状语,描写了紧张、害怕但又极力保持冷静的心理。
[2]运用了非限制性定语从句,描写了“我”想到用背包保护自己的主意。
[3]运用了breathed a deep sigh of relief和as引导的时间状语从句,描写了“我”得到救援后如释重负的心情。
[4]运用了虚拟语气,表达了“我”对护林员的感激。
[5]采用了“否定+比较级”表示最高级,进行了主旨升华。
课堂应用
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2025重庆高三模拟)
The waves crashed heavily against the rocks,the stormy sea swallowing the once-powerful ship.The only survivor of the shipwreck was brought by the currents to the shore of a small,uninhabited island.His desperate cries for help mixed with the roar of the storm,only to be swallowed by the ocean.
Exhausted and disoriented,he lay on the sandy beach,thanking whatever forces had saved his life.After he surveyed the surroundings,he realized the harsh reality of his isolation.He scanned the horizon for any sign of rescue,but no help appeared.In the midst of despair,he gradually awakened to the fact that he had to survive on this uninhabited island on his own.Driven by great determination,the survivor managed to build a shelter with the driftwood to protect him from the elements,and to store his few possessions.
Days turned into weeks,and weeks into months.The survivor,once stuck in his isolation,started exploring the island’s hidden treasures.His routine became a dull cycle of hunting for food,collecting rainwater,and scanning the horizon for any sign of rescue.But the vast expanse of the ocean offered no comfort,no ship on the horizon to save him.
Despite his loneliness,the survivor clung to hope.The sunrises brought a glimmer of optimism,and he kept scanning the horizon,searching for any trace of rescue.
Then,one fateful day,as he returned from a fruitless search for food,he was greeted by a devastating sight—his shelter was on fire,and the smoke was rolling up to the sky!The worst had happened—the fire had consumed all his possessions,leaving him nothing but the clothes on his back.Desperation and disbelief seized him as he watched the smoke rise to the sky,a cruel demonstration of his misfortune.
注意:1.续写词数应为150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
“Oh,dear,how could you do this to me!” he cried.
The rescuers explained that they had seen the smoke signal from the burning shelter.
“Oh,dear,how could you do this to me!” he cried.The cry of misery and desperation echoed through the air as he fell to his knees.He lay on the ground silently,and now,even the shelter he had painstakingly constructed lay in ruins. The fire not only consumed his shelter but also the hope that had kept him going.In the depths of despair,the survivor slept restlessly.But as the first rays of dawn painted the sky,he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island.He couldn’t believe his eyes when rescuers stood before him.Puzzled,he asked,“How did you know I was here ”
The rescuers explained that they had seen the smoke signal from the burning shelter.It dawned on the survivor that what seemed like a tragedy,the loss of his possessions and shelter,had unintentionally become a smoke signal that guided the rescue.He boarded the ship happily,leaving the island behind. The survivor looked back at the island,now fading into the horizon.The ship carried the survivor towards a new chapter.He had a firm belief that sometimes hope could emerge from the ashes,so it’s crucial not to lose heart even if in the darkest moments.
热考话题四 人与社会——守望互助
“赠人玫瑰,手有余香”,当我们帮助别人的时候,自己也会获得愉悦感和幸福感。2020年新高考卷话题为卖爆米花帮助穷人,2024年新课标卷话题为善良的出租车司机,两者都体现了互助主题,传递了人间温情。
【思维建模】
一、谋好篇——续写情节安排
二、写好句——细节佳句积累
(一)困境描写
1.意外发现昏迷的邻居
Something didn’t feel right (感觉有些事情不对劲儿).“Why would anyone leave their kids unattended on the shore ”Mary thought.She grabbed the kids’ hands and walked them to their home,across from her own house.As Mary opened the door,she found the young mother lying unconscious on the kitchen floor (发现年轻的母亲晕倒在厨房地板上).
情节走向:Mary发觉事情不对劲儿→带着孩子走到他们家→开门发现孩子妈妈昏迷
2.家中失火,亲人被困
We finally pulled into my neighbourhood which was full of fire trucks,police cars,and black ash (到处都是消防车、警车和黑灰).We jumped out of the car and started running to the father and I screamed at the top of my voice (扯着嗓子大叫),“Anna is in the house!”We attempted to enter the house but the police officers grabbed our arms.
情节走向:我们把车停在社区→跳下车朝房子跑去→大喊Anna 在里面→试图进入被阻
(二)助人过程
1.寻找家人
Tenderly,I picked the girl up,carrying her through the crowd as I patiently kept asking her to recall (我抱着那个女孩穿过人群,耐心地反复让她回忆)where her parents had been.I carried her to the fence,constantly asking the passers-by (不断询问路人),“Is this your child ” Though numerous passers-by said no,I didn’t give up.
情节走向:我抱着女孩穿过人群,让其回忆父母之前的位置→不断询问路人→询问无果仍不放弃
2.求助老师化解矛盾
Depressed and hopeless,Sarah ran across the hall to seek help (跑过大厅寻求帮助) from their teacher Katie.After knowing what had happened to Sarah, Katie felt sorry.She went to Sarah’s dormitory and had a long conversation with (与……进行了长时间的交谈) Sarah and Lily.Katie shared her experience in getting on well with her roommate.
情节走向:Sarah感到沮丧和绝望,找Katie 老师求助→了解Sarah的遭遇后, Katie感到很抱歉→Katie去Sarah的宿舍→与Sarah和Lily谈心
(三)圆满结局
1.Through the experience,I learned that helping others in need makes our day as well.Just as the saying goes,“Roses given,fragrance in hand (赠人玫瑰,手有余香).”
2.Finally,through the crowd of people,I recognized a face,“Mommy!” I cried out and dashed toward her.Filled with a mixture of excitement and relief (充满了兴奋和宽慰),I threw myself into Mom’s arms and hugged her tightly,as if never letting go of her.
3.A small act/gesture of kindness will perhaps melt/cure one’s loneliness (一个小小的善意行为可能会融化/治愈一个人内心的孤独).
[典题印证] (2024新课标Ⅰ卷)
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
I met Gunter on a cold,wet and unforgettable evening in September.I had planned to fly to Vienna and take a bus to Prague for a conference.Due to a big storm,my flight had been delayed by an hour and a half.I touched down in Vienna just 30 minutes before the departure of the last bus to Prague.The moment I got off the plane,I ran like crazy through the airport building and jumped into the first taxi on the rank without a second thought.
That was when I met Gunter.I told him where I was going,but he said he hadn’t heard of the bus station.I thought my pronunciation was the problem,so I explained again more slowly,but he still looked confused.When I was about to give up,Gunter fished out his little phone and rang up a friend.After a heated discussion that lasted for what seemed like a century,Gunter put his phone down and started the car.
Finally,with just two minutes to spare we rolled into the bus station. Thankfully,there was a long queue(队列) still waiting to board the bus.Gunter parked the taxi behind the bus,turned around,and looked at me with a big smile on his face.“We made it,” he said.
Just then I realised that I had zero cash in my wallet.I flashed him an apologetic smile as I pulled out my Portuguese bankcard.He tried it several times,but the card machine just did not play along.A feeling of helplessness washed over me as I saw the bus queue thinning out.
At this moment,Gunter pointed towards the waiting hall of the bus station. There,at the entrance,was a cash machine.I jumped out of the car,made a mad run for the machine,and popped my card in,only to read the message: “Out of order.Sorry.”
注意:1.续写词数应为 150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
I ran back to Gunter and told him the bad news.
Four days later,when I was back in Vienna,I called Gunter as promised.
[分步解读指导]
Step 1 抓核心线索,厘故事脉络
人物 I:decisive;calm Taxi driver Gunter: helpful;friendly 时间 On a cold,wet and unforgettable evening in September
地点 In Vienna
冲突/矛盾 “我”钱包里没现金,无法支付给出租车司机。去提款机那里取钱,但是机器出故障了,“我”承诺司机过几天给他。 文章主题 陌生人相助,信守承诺
情节线 (起)“我”前往布拉格参加会议,由于航班延误,“我”担心会错过最后一班前往布拉格的巴士。→(承)下飞机后,“我”跳上了机场的第一辆出租车,遇到司机Gunter。由于一系列的沟通困难和误会,我们差点无法找到巴士站。→(转)在Gunter的帮助下,“我”在最后时刻到达了巴士站。然而,由于取款机故障,“我”的银行卡无法取钱。Gunter允许“我”先登上巴士,几天后再支付车费,体现了他的善良和对“我”的信任。→(合)四天后,“我”回到维也纳,如约与Gunter见面并还钱。“我”感受到童话般的人间温情。
Step 2 五句定位,建续写框架
Step 3 思伏笔添细节,原续更融洽
捕捉原文所设伏笔,充盈过渡句细节并合理衔接,以使续写段落在逻辑和内容上更符合原文基调。
原文伏笔点 过渡句中可与伏笔衔接的细节
Para.5 I jumped out of the car,made a mad run for the machine,and popped my card in, only to read the message:“Out of order.Sorry.” 续写第一段可添加关于“我”用了各种办法仍无法付车费的尴尬和无助的情绪描写
Para.2 When I was about to give up,Gunter fished out his little phone and rang up a friend.After a heated discussion that lasted for what seemed like a century,Gunter put his phone down and started the car. 续写第一段可添加情节叙述:描写Gunter人很好,不辞辛苦,愿意帮忙
原文伏笔点 过渡句中可与伏笔衔接的细节
Para.3 Gunter parked the taxi behind the bus,turned around,and looked at me with a big smile on his face. 续写第一段可添加神态细节:面对
“我”无钱支付的情况,Gunter微笑着同意“我”先走
Para.1 I had planned to fly to Vienna and take a bus to Prague for a conference. 续写第一段结尾可添加“我”成功登上去布拉格的巴士,顺利参加了会议的衔接句
Para.1 I met Gunter on a cold,wet and unforgettable evening in September. 续写第二段结尾可添加“我”对这段经历的感悟以呼应该段开头的“我”与Gunter见面
必要细节:原文中“我”做出的承诺 续写第一段可添加“我”提出要兑现承诺的情节
Step 4 沿原文特点,写3好表达(准确、丰富、地道)
原文使用了多变的句式和生动的描写,恰到好处地推动了情节的发展,如运用了动作链描写讲述“我”下飞机后匆忙搭乘出租车去赶最后一班巴士,运用了形象的动作描写和生动的神态描写讲述“我”和出租车司机Gunter经过一番曲折和沟通后终于前往巴士站,运用无灵主语描写了“我”发现自己没带现金、银行卡支付失败以及取款机无法使用时的无助。续写时应学会借鉴和仿效,这样才能与原文语言风格保持一致。
佳作赏析
I ran back to Gunter and told him the bad news.He looked at me in disbelief,asking me what to do.(衔接句④) Giving him another apologetic smile[1],I asked him for a delay in payment and promised to call him and pay back the money I owed him.To my surprise,Gunter wrote down his phone number without hesitation and gave it to me[2].“Just keep your promise,sir.” A feeling of gratitude washed over me.[3] I gave him a firm handshake,made a mad dash for the bus and jumped onto it just before it left.[4](结尾句③)
Four days later,when I was back in Vienna,I called Gunter as promised. We met at the bus station where he had dropped me off four days before[5]. (衔接句⑤) As soon as I saw him,I gave him a big hug.I told him that without his kindness and timely help,things wouldn’t have gone smoothly[6].I paid him for the ride,along with a generous tip,which he declined.I felt blessed to have met such a warm-hearted man.Then we parted ways with a firm handshake and a promise to keep in touch.(结尾句①) Gunter’s kindness had turned a potentially disastrous evening into a memorable story I would cherish for years to come.[7](升华句②)
亮句解读
[1]运用现在分词短语作状语呼应原文。
[2]动作链描写有效衔接续写第二段首句信息。
[3]无灵主语句,生动形象地描述“我”的感激之情。
[4]呼应原文,三连动增强了动作的画面感。
[5]运用限制性定语从句,和原文形成有效衔接。
[6]运用虚拟语气,和原文形成有效衔接,侧面表达了“我”的感激之情。
[7]最后主旨升华,回扣原文。
课堂应用
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2025河北石家庄下学期教学质量检测)
Teachers are a gift,especially Troy’s teacher,Donna.She always goes above and beyond for her students,but what she did for Troy’s family is truly beyond selflessness but a miracle(奇迹).
Donna is one of those teachers who pay close attention to the students in their classroom.She began to notice something odd in one of her elementary students,Troy.He was not active in class like he had been.Troy used to be a passionate student in class,engaging with teachers and his friends.Being a helping hand to the teacher and classmates,Troy was always welcomed by everybody.However,he was all of a sudden so shut down and his behavior was simply not the same.He seemed to be silent all the time,and his eyes lost light of desire for knowledge and passion for any activities.Donna grew very concerned and wondered if there was something going on that affected his performance at school.So,she reached out to Troy’s mom to express her concerns.
And that was when she discovered something wrong.For the past year,his mom had been in stage-five kidney(肾) failure.She was in pain every day and desperately needed a new kidney.But she had a rare blood type,so finding a match for a kidney transplant was virtually impossible.Her condition had been a very long and anxious journey.It had been so painful for the family,and it had definitely made an impact on Troy.And in class,he had been silently carrying the pain his mom was going through at home.
The news broke Donna’s heart.She knew that she just had to do something.She was there as a loving friend to help Troy with his studies,but she was also there for his mom.Donna researched how to become a kidney donor and discovered that she had the same rare blood type as Troy’s mom. She got tested and,surprisingly,she was a match.
注意:1.续写词数应为150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
When Donna told the news to Troy’s family,everyone was surprised.
Soon the kidney transplant took place.
When Donna told the news to Troy’s family,everyone was surprised.They could hardly believe that their beloved teacher was willing to go through such a personal sacrifice for them.This being a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for the mother,all the family couldn’t thank Donna enough for her kindness and compassion.Troy’s mother was deeply moved by Donna’s selflessness and generosity,and at the same time,the prospect of healing brought renewed hope and joy into their lives,especially for Troy,who felt a glimmer of happiness return.
Soon the kidney transplant took place.The operation was a success,and Troy’s mom began to recover with the new kidney functioning well.As she started to get healthier and more energetic,the family’s burden was eased. Seeing his mother regain her strength,Troy felt spirits improved significantly. He became active in class once again,engaging eagerly with his peers and teachers.The change was evident in his bright eyes and enthusiastic participation.Donna’s loving support not only impacted Troy’s academic performance but also helped save his mother’s life,forever changing the course of their family’s journey. (共35张PPT)
第2讲 抓核心线索,厘故事脉络
线索1 提炼架构要点,梳理故事情节
线索2 锁定关键词句,把握情感基调
目 录 索 引
线索3 明确核心冲突,做好情节准备
线索1 提炼架构要点,梳理故事情节
方式1 四要素串联核心点,掌握人物活动
读后续写的文章一般是记叙文,事情的发展过程包括“开端、发展、高潮、结果”,也就是行文结构4大要素,找到这4个结构要素对梳理情节非常重要。梳理情节时要注意结合记叙文六要素,即时间(when)、地点(where)、人物(character)、起因(reason)、经过(course)及结果(ending)。
[典例] (2024新课标Ⅰ卷)情节梳理如下:
[注意]通常故事的开端和发展为给出的阅读部分,故事的高潮和结局为续写部分。明确文章各个部分属于哪一要素,对于把握续写情节方向和内容大有裨益。
方式2 依据时空线索,分析主要情节
[典例] (2023浙江1月卷) 时空线索如下:
通过上述分析可知故事情节如下:
到朋友农场参加露天烧烤,被一个声音吸引→进入挤奶房发现一只蜂鸟被困于蛛网中→拯救蜂鸟→蜂鸟没有立刻飞走,盯着作者看后飞走→烧烤过程中作者告诉东道主此事→餐后蜂鸟飞回来,好像是说再见→(续写第一段)几周后,作者重回农场,想到了什么 做了什么 感觉是怎样的 →(续写第二段)蜂鸟出现后,它如何表现 作者有什么反应 作者感悟到了什么
方式3 切分文本结构,明确发展方向
记叙文的行文结构包括4大要素,即“起、承、转、合”,对于故事情节较曲折的文章来说,找到这四个结构要素对梳理文章情节非常重要。文章遵循“起→承→转→合”的结构特点,对应故事的“发生→发展→转折或高潮→结局”。
[典例] (2022新高考Ⅰ卷)情节梳理如下:
线索2 锁定关键词句,把握情感基调
情感基调指的是文章的感彩,作者的基本观点的情感取向,也就是作者想要表达的总的情感态度,如是欢乐的还是悲伤的,是激昂豪迈的还是委婉含蓄的,是积极向上的还是消沉的等。只有准确把握原文本的情感基调,考生才能使续写的内容与原文融合在一起。
角度1 锁定细节用词
例:[2024新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷]...The moment I got off the plane,I ran like crazy through the airport building and jumped into the first taxi on the rank without a second thought.
...After a heated discussion that lasted for what seemed like a century, Gunter put his phone down and started the car.
...
At this moment,Gunter pointed towards the waiting hall of the bus station. There,at the entrance,was a cash machine.I jumped out of the car,made a mad run for the machine,and popped my card in,only to read the message: “Out of order.Sorry.”
名师剖析
曲线处的内容通过夸张的修辞手法刻画出作者的焦急心情。横线处的内容体现出Gunter总能保持冷静,由此可推测出故事走向是Gunter帮助作者成功赶上了车。
例:[2024新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷]That was when I met Gunter.I told him where I was going,but he said he hadn’t heard of the bus station.I thought my pronunciation was the problem,so I explained again more slowly,but he still looked confused.When I was about to give up,Gunter fished out his little phone and rang up a friend.After a heated discussion that lasted for what seemed like a century,Gunter put his phone down and started the car.
...Gunter parked the taxi behind the bus,turned around,and looked at me with a big smile on his face.“We made it,” he said.
角度2 细品人物语言
名师剖析
从原文有关对话的描写可以看出,Gunter认真负责并且很有耐心,也可以看出Gunter非常热心,希望帮助作者赶上车,这些描写可以帮助学生推测后面Gunter的语言和行为。
例:[2024新课标Ⅰ、Ⅱ卷]I met Gunter on a cold,wet and unforgettable evening in September.I had planned to fly to Vienna and take a bus to Prague for a conference.Due to a big storm,my flight had been delayed by an hour and a half...
...
Finally,with just two minutes to spare we rolled into the bus station. Thankfully,there was a long queue(队列) still waiting to board the bus.Gunter parked the taxi behind the bus,turned around,and looked at me with a big smile on his face.“We made it,” he said.
角度3 巧借环境描写
Just then I realised that I had zero cash in my wallet.I flashed him an apologetic smile as I pulled out my Portuguese bankcard.He tried it several times,but the card machine just did not play along.A feeling of helplessness washed over me as I saw the bus queue thinning out.
名师剖析
曲线处的内容是自然环境描写,说明了故事起因,交代了主人公相遇的时间,通过环境的潮湿阴冷烘托作者的焦急心情。横线处的句子是对车站环境的描写,看到排队队伍时,作者松了一口气,但当队伍越来越短,作者还没有付钱给Gunter时,作者越发无助。通过前后对比凸显出情绪的变化,烘托迫切气氛。
线索3 明确核心冲突,做好情节准备
对记叙文而言,矛盾冲突是决定其情节发展的关键,这种矛盾冲突可能是一个人内心的内在冲突,也有可能是与他人、与环境的外在冲突,但无论内在还是外在,矛盾冲突都是一个故事的精髓。读后续写中续写内容往往是冲突的解决与结局,冲突的解决方式也会在原文中或明或暗地有所提示。考生可以从以下三个角度来挖掘核心冲突,找到核心冲突的解决方式。
方式1 重视首段背景信息
文章首段可能会出现核心冲突产生的原因,因此我们在阅读的过程中要善于发现这些伏笔。
[典例] (2024新课标Ⅰ& Ⅱ)
I met Gunter on a cold,wet and unforgettable evening in September.I had planned to fly to Vienna and take a bus to Prague for a conference.Due to a big storm,my flight had been delayed by an hour and a half.I touched down in Vienna just 30 minutes before the departure of the last bus to Prague.The moment I got off the plane,I ran like crazy through the airport building and jumped into the first taxi on the rank without a second thought.
[分析]本段交代了故事发生的背景:作者在九月份的一个寒冷、下着雨的傍晚遇见了Gunter,暴雨导致作者的飞机延误了一个半小时,作者在距离末班车出发仅剩半个小时的时候下的飞机。一下飞机就慌忙上了出租车,可见时间很仓促。这为下文作者没带现金,付不了车费作了铺垫。
方式2 挖掘隐藏情节伏笔
核心冲突的解决方案可能在故事的中间段落已被暗示出来。中间段落是故事发展的过程,在这个过程中,作者也可以设置解决核心冲突的伏笔。
[典例] (2022新高考Ⅰ卷)
...He hesitated and then said he had decided not to run.
What was wrong He had worked so hard for this event!
I quickly searched the crowd for the school’s coach and asked him what had happened...
I bit back my frustration(懊恼).I knew the coach meant well—he thought he was doing the right thing.After making sure that David could run if he wanted,I turned to find him coming towards me,his small body rocking from side to side as he swung his feet forward.
[分析]根据原文中的“he had decided not to run”和“He had worked so hard for this event!”可知,David最后决定不参加比赛,但是前期已经为比赛付出了极大的努力。由此可判断David内心是渴望参加比赛的。再结合“David could run if he wanted”可知,如果David愿意,David依然可以参赛,由此可以判断,解决本文核心冲突的关键在于David自己内心的坚定,为后面 David 踏上赛道埋了伏笔。
方式3 用好尾段冲突暗示
一些读后续写所给语篇尾段的描述体现了人物内心冲突或人物关系冲突的迹象或开端,而续写段落应该是冲突的发展、高潮,在语篇尾段中准确捕捉冲突的伏笔可帮助我们合理构思情节的发展和高潮。
[典例1] (2022浙江1月卷)
After long discussions we somehow agreed to do a study on the psychological well-being of teenagers.I wasn’t sure what it meant exactly,but at least we had a topic.
[分析]上文描述作者成绩一般。面对一个专心学习、成绩优秀但自傲的合作伙伴,作者感到自卑、消极。尾段介绍,经过长时间的讨论,作者与合作伙伴最终设法确定了项目主题,这为续写部分中他们定期研讨项目情节做好了铺垫。“I wasn’t sure what it meant exactly”这句话也为续写段落中作者在项目研讨中的表现埋下了伏笔。
[典例2] (2021浙江6月卷)
My labors lasted about two weeks,and the farmer said there might be more work,but I wasn’t interested.I decided it was not fair that I had to contribute my money.
[分析]上文描述作者得知他打工挣来的钱要贴补家庭开销而不能随心花了,为此他心情不悦。所以在尾段中,作者可能还有更多的工作要做但他并不感兴趣,作者认为把自己挣来的钱贡献出来不公平。这为下文,即续写段落中他与父亲就他挣到的钱的用途产生冲突埋下了伏笔。
课堂应用
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2025全国二卷)
“What is your name ” is a question most frequently asked when people meet for the first time.But for me,it was the first challenge I encountered as an international student in Ireland.
The pronunciation system of the Chinese language is quite different from that of English.For native speakers of English,some Chinese words are rather difficult to pronounce.My given name Qiuyu(秋雨),for instance,happened to be a great challenge for many of them.Every time I gave a self-introduction,I had to explain how to pronounce my name at least five times,yet they still could not say it the way I did.
Once in a lecture,the professor tried repeating my name after me over and over in front of thirty classmates.I really did not know whether I should continue correcting him or simply drop the matter.I feared that my classmates might grow tired of my efforts or even lose patience with me.After all,I did care about how others would think of me.I realized that if I didn’t stop,the entire lecture would be ruined.“It’s okay,professor,” I shrugged (耸肩).The awkward moment ended with the class erupting into laughter.I forced a smile, unsure how to respond further.
After that incident,I stopped acting as a “Chinese teacher.” Instead of correcting others when
they were struggling to pronounce my name,I just smiled and nodded approvingly.This approach spared me the discomfort of having to over-explain. However,I soon found that by doing so,I might be losing something more important:the opportunity to share a small part of my cultural identity.
注意:1.续写词数应为150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
In a class discussion,I was invited to explain the meaning of my name.
Many of my classmates got interested and came up to me after class.
In a class discussion,I was invited to explain the meaning of my name.My heart raced as thirty pairs of eyes turned to me.Taking a deep breath,I traced the Chinese characters in the air:“qiū means golden autumn,and yǔ is gentle rain that nourishes the earth.In my culture,this name carries wishes for wisdom and growth.” To my astonishment,the professor repeated “Qiūyǔ” with remarkable clarity,his blue eyes sparkling with newfound understanding.A hush fell over the room,and then Maria from Italy murmured,“It’s like poetry!” The tension I’d carried since that awkward lecture began melting away.
Many of my classmates got interested and came up to me after class.Liam thrust his notebook toward me,its margin filled with phonetic attempts:“Show-ee Choo-yoo ” His earnest frown dissolved into laughter when I demonstrated the soft “Qiu” sound.Soon a small crowd gathered,taking turns practicing the tones.“It’s not just a name,” I explained,touched by their curiosity,“it’s a story from my homeland.” When Sarah finally said “Qiūyǔ” with flowing cadences, we cheered like we’d conquered Qomolangma.In that moment,my name transformed from a stumbling block to a bridge—each imperfect attempt is a stepping stone toward mutual respect. (共15张PPT)
第4讲 耐人寻味,巧妙结尾
一篇好文章,除了有吸引眼球的开头,引人入胜的情节,还应该有耐人寻味的结尾。作为篇章的结尾有两个作用:一是圆合文章,二是深化主题。要想写好续写的结尾,让其具有“画龙点睛”的作用,可以采用下面六种结尾方式:
方式(一) 感悟式结尾
感悟式结尾是作者从自身的经历中领悟道理的直接描述。
①(2024新课标Ⅰ卷)I felt blessed to have such a warm-hearted friend like Gunter who has a heart of gold.
我感到很幸运能有像Gunter这样有一颗金子般的心的热心朋友。
②(2023新课标Ⅰ卷)What I learned from the writing contest was that when faced with challenges,I should be courageous and try to make a difference!
我从写作比赛中学到的是:当面对挑战时,我应该勇敢,努力做出改变!
方式(二) 哲理式结尾
哲理式结尾是借用名言或谚语等的句子来作为故事的结尾。
①(2024新课标Ⅰ卷)A small act of kindness could make a great difference to others.
一个小小的善举可能会对别人产生很大的影响。
②(2022新课标Ⅰ卷)Nothing is impossible to a willing heart.
世上无难事,只怕有心人。
方式(三) 自然式结尾
自然式结尾是按照故事情节的发展顺序,直接叙述人物的具体动作或行为。
①(2024新课标Ⅰ卷)Then we wished each other all the best and I gave him a grateful hug.
然后我们互相祝福,我感激地拥抱了他。
②(2024浙江1月卷)Her teachers were all amazed about her changes and her classmates also showed respect to her.From then on,Eva had more confidence to do anything.
她的老师都对她的变化感到惊讶,她的同学也对她表示尊重。从那时起,伊娃更有信心去做任何事情。
方式(四) 对话式结尾
对话式结尾是直接呈现人物所说的话。对话可以是双方的,也可以是单方的。
①(2023新课标Ⅰ卷)Then he pointed that my passion,devotion and persistence contributed to my success.“Just like the horse you wrote,he got tired and had doubts,but he kept going.”
然后他指出,是我的热情、奉献和坚持促成了我的成功。“就像你写的那匹马,它累了,有了怀疑,但它继续前进。”
②(2023浙江1月卷)As I moved on and got ready to leave,my friend said to me,“Cherish such a magical memory,and this has to be very rare.”
当我准备离开时,我的朋友对我说:“珍惜这段神奇的记忆,这是非常罕见的。”
方式(五) 呼应式结尾
呼应式结尾是利用前文中人物代表性的特征、情感或所做的事件来体现主旨。
①(2023新课标Ⅰ卷)
开头:When I was in middle school,my social studies teacher asked me to enter a writing contest.
结尾:I owe my success to my social studies teacher who is a beacon in my life on the road to writing.
我把我的成功归功于我的社会学老师,他是我写作道路上的灯塔。
②(2022新高考Ⅰ卷)
前文:His usual big toothy smile was absent today.
结尾:Crossing the finish line,his usual big smile was there as that sunny day.
过了终点线,他像往常一样露出了灿烂的笑容,如同明媚的阳光。
方式(六) 景情式结尾
景情式结尾通过寓情于景,以景结情,借景抒情等方法描写景物,寄托或抒发作者的某种情感。
①(2023浙江1月卷)Moments later,she let out a squeaking call,spread her wings,and flew into the sky.This beautiful picture stayed in my memory forever.
过了一会儿,它发出一声尖叫,展开翅膀,飞上了天空。这幅美丽的画面永远留在了我的记忆中。
②(2023浙江1月卷)Despite the chill autumn wind,I was filled with the warmth of love and pleasure.
尽管秋风凛冽,我却充满了爱和喜悦的温暖。
课堂应用
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
(2023浙江1月卷)
I was invited to a cookout on an old friend’s farm in western Washington. I parked my car outside the farm and walked past a milking house which had apparently not been used in many years.A noise at a window caught my attention,so I entered it.It was a hummingbird(蜂鸟),desperately trying to escape.She was covered in spider-webs(蛛网) and was barely able to move her wings.She ceased her struggle the instant I picked her up.
With the bird in my cupped hand,I looked around to see how she had gotten in.The broken window glass was the likely answer.I stuffed a piece of cloth into the hole and took her outside,closing the door securely behind me.
When I opened my hand,the bird did not fly away;she sat looking at me with her bright eyes.I removed the sticky spider-webs that covered her head and wings.Still,she made no attempt to fly.Perhaps she had been struggling against the window too long and was too tired Or too thirsty
As I carried her up the blackberry-lined path toward my car where I kept a water bottle,she began to move.I stopped,and she soon took wing but did not immediately fly away.
Hovering(悬停),she approached within six inches of my face.For a very long moment,this tiny creature looked into my eyes,turning her head from side to side.Then she flew quickly out of sight.
During the cookout,I told my hosts about the hummingbird incident.They promised to fix the window.As I was departing,my friends walked me to my car.I was standing by the car when a hummingbird flew to the center of our group and began hovering.She turned from person to person until she came to me.She again looked directly into my eyes,then let out a squeaking call and was gone.For a moment,all were speechless.Then someone said,“She must have come to say goodbye.”
注意:1.续写词数应为150个左右;
2.请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
A few weeks later,I went to the farm again.
I was just about to leave when the hummingbird appeared.
A few weeks later,I went to the farm again.As my car neared it,my thoughts drifted back to the moment when I rescued the hummingbird from the spider-webs.I rushed back to the deserted house.It was a great comfort that the original hole in the window was nowhere to be found.Leaving the house,I couldn’t help wondering how it was getting on now.Had it managed to find its way back home,or was it still out there somewhere struggling to survive
I was just about to leave when the hummingbird appeared.A flash of movement caught my attention.I turned around to see the same hummingbird hovering in the air.It seemed that the bird was waiting for me,its beady eyes locked on mine as if trying to convey some deep,unspoken gratitude.I felt a surge of relief and awe at the sight of this sound and grateful creature,and I knew that I would always cherish the memories we shared as I climbed into my car and drove away.
