中小学教育资源及组卷应用平台
(
高考夹叙夹议文写作指导
)
(
知识
导图
)
(
要
点
精析
)
夹叙夹议文是一种比较常见的写作文体,
以记人叙事为主,
记叙人物的经历或事物/事件发生、发展、变化的过程。兼有总结全文，深化主题。材料常涉及社会生活现象、人物或自然景物。无论记人还是叙事都要通过叙述、描写来加以表达,
把人物的经历或行为、发生的事情/事件用一定的顺序和语言技巧叙述出来。在叙述过程中“人以事显,
事由人生”,
人和事是密不可分的。在一篇记叙文中记人、写景、叙事往往是交织在一起的,
不能简单地分裂开。高考作文一般都不会单纯的记叙某事，而是夹叙夹议。
1.
写作结构指导：
结构完整,
内容清楚
一篇记叙文无论长短都应该是一个完全独立的事实,
因此在下笔时必须明确该从何处开始叙述,
何处结束叙述以及应该提供何种事实才能使叙述完整。
中心突出,
详略得当
明确写作目的和叙述的中心思想,
避免空洞的叙述或与主题无关的内容,文章的内容、结构、层次及所用语言都应围绕主题展开进行。叙述时必须繁简疏密相间,
突出主题的内容要加以详细具体的描写,
这样有助于读者对所叙述的人物或事件有个深刻的印象,
而对过渡性的内容作简短的交代即可。
脉络/主线清晰,语言灵活生动
一篇好的记叙文需要直接或间接表达以下六要素：事件发生的时间、地点、人物角色、原因、过程和结果(when,
where,
who,
why,
what,
how)。写作顺序可采用“顺叙”、“倒叙”和“穿插叙述”的方法,
但初学者最好采用”顺叙”的方法进行训练,
即以情节发生时间的先后为序。
为了使叙述生动,
具有吸引力,
必须注意词汇运用得恰当、通顺、简洁和准确,
时态、人称要一致,
注重上下文的相关性、连续性,
以及与表达内容的一致性。
2.
常用句型
.
Vivid
memories
come
flooding
back
to
...
when
I
was
...
.
If
my
memory
serves
me
right,
it
happened
on
...
.
December
27th,
2012
was
the
most
unforgettable
day
for
me.
.
It
dated
back
to
...
.
In
terms
of
appearance,
he
is
of
medium
build,
with
small
and
bright
eyes.
.
He/She
always
wears
a
friendly
smile
on
his/her
face,
which
makes
him/her
pretty
approachable.
.
I
admire
him/her
for
...
.
He/She
is
enthusiastic/strict/hardworking/devoted/humorous/worthy
of
our
respect.
.
It
is
he
who
enlightens
my
mind;
it
is
he
who
taps
my
potential
in...
it
is
he
who
encourages/supports
me
when
I
lose
confidence.
(
课堂典例
)
1
描述你在学校的一次难忘的活动。具体要求如下：
1.
详细描述活动的情况;
2.
简要表述你在活动中的感受。
例文：
Thursday,
December
27th,
2020,
was
the
most
unforgettable
day
in
Senior
Three
for
me.
It
was
the
first
time,
as
well
as
the
last
time
that
I
had
performed
on
the
stage
of
our
school
at
the
closing
ceremony
of
the
School
Art
Festival.
As
scheduled,
the
ceremony
began
at
7
o’clock
that
evening
and
everyone
felt
excited,
awaiting
the
wonderful
performances.
In
fact,
the
performances
were
undoubtedly
sensationally
terrific,
but
I
just
couldn’t
be
fully
absorbed
in
them.
I
was
a
bit
nervous.
At
the
summon
of
the
teacher,
nearly
200
Senior
Three
students,
including
me,
went
to
the
back
of
the
stage
to
prepare
for
our
singing
performance.
Everyone
took
his
place
and
after
that,
I
couldn’t
help
thinking
that
it
was
my
last
Art
Festival
and
that
I
should
spare
no
effort
to
add
a
brilliant
touch
to
it.
Slowly,
the
curtain
was
drawn
up.
There
burst
out
a
loud
applause
in
the
audience,
louder
than
whatever
I’d
heard.
All
the
people
were
expecting
a
great
deal
of
us
and
we
were
standing
still,
every
muscle
ready.
At
the
sound
of
the
music,
we
threw
all
the
nervousness
into
the
wind
and
sang
to
our
heart’s
content.
Together
we
sang
out
our
passion,
our
belief
and
our
dreams.
The
charm
of
the
song
fascinated
everyone
and
our
resounding
voice
lasted
in
the
auditorium.
Absolutely,
we
sang
far
better
than
any
of
the
previous
rehearsals
and
our
performance
turned
out
a
success.
Very
soon,
we’ll
bid
farewell
to
our
beloved
Alma
Mater
and
headed
into
our
bright
future.
However,
the
unforgettable
scene
of
that
day
will
impress
me
upon
my
mind
permanently.
结构点评
引言段：
开门见山点出记叙文的核心要素——时间、地点、人物和事件
中心段：
作者用第一人称,
以时间(黑体画线处)为顺序完整具体地叙述了事件的过程,
同时穿插了动作和心理描写(黑体部分),
画龙点睛式地表达了作者的感受,
突出了主题。
结束段：
回归主题,
突出重点
语言点评
引言段：
短句加长句：It
was
the
first
time
that
sb.
had
done
sth.
(定语从句),
开头简短精练。
中心段：
1.
以时间为顺序陈述事件;
表时间的词语很灵活,
不单调,
如：as
scheduled;
at
the
summon
of
the
teacher;
at
the
sound
of
the
music;
slowly;
turned
out。
2.
动作和心理描写精确,
如：nervous;
couldn’t
help
thinking;
every
muscle
ready;
sang
to
our
heart’s
content。
3.
长短句运用自然、流畅,
如：everyone
felt
excited,
awaiting
the
wonderful
performances
(用分词作伴随状语形象地描写了观众期盼的心情)。
4.
文中还运用了许多并列结构,
如：I
couldn’t
help
thinking
that
...
and
that
...
2
简单叙述一下某天你或一位同学生病(或受伤)后的情况。具体包括:
1.
同学、老师是如何帮助我(他/她)的;
2.
人与人之间的这种相互关爱给我的感受是...
例文
A
few
years
ago,
while
still
in
my
junior
high
school,
I
twisted
my
ankle
in
a
basketball
game.
I
was
attempting
a
lay-up.
And
when
I
landed,
I
landed
wrongly
and
unfortunately
twisted
my
ankle.
Immediately,
my
ankle
became
swollen
and
I
felt
so
painful
that
I
couldn’t
get
up
and
walk.
At
the
very
moment
I
also
felt
so
embarrassed
as
to
just
stay
there
and
not
be
able
to
move.
Seeing
something
going
wrong
with
me,
my
friends
and
my
teacher
came
over
right
soon.
My
teacher,
Mr.
Lee,
first
checked
the
situation
of
my
foot.
Knowing
that
I
couldn’t
play
any
longer,
Mr.
Lee
took
me
up
and
carried
me
out
of
the
court.
Simultaneously,
my
friends
all
gave
me
warm
comfort
and
managed
to
get
me
ice
in
order
to
lessen
the
pain.
Later
on,
my
parents
came
and
picked
me
up.
Then
we
went
to
the
hospital
and
found
out
that
I
wouldn’t
be
able
to
move
normally
for
approximately
a
month.
Although
I
cramped
for
a
month
after
that
unfortunate
incident,
I
felt
more
happy
than
frustrated,
as
I
felt
the
love
coming
from
my
teacher
and
my
friends.
I
was
touched
for
what
they
did
for
me
right
after
I
got
injured.
From
the
incident
I
understood
that
being
loved
and
cared
is
a
blessing
and
that
whenever
I
have
the
ability
to
do
so
for
others,
I
should
always
lend
out
a
helping
hand.
结构点评
引言段：
开门见山点出记叙文的核心要素——时间、地点、人物和事件。
中心段：
作者用第一人称和第三人称(my
teacher
and
friends)穿插,
以时间(黑体画线处)为顺序完整具体地记叙了事件过程,
同时细腻地描写了动作和心理感受(斜体黑体部分),
突出主题。
结束段：
回归主题，突出重点，最后一句升华主题。
语言点评
引言段：
长短句运用自然：while引导的状语从句和when引导的时间状语从句交代了事件发生的时间,
简短精练。
中心段：
1.
表时间的词语很灵活：
副词：immediately,
simultaneously,
later
on,
then;
介词短语：at
the
very
moment;
分词：seeing,
knowing
2.
动作和心理描写精确,
如：painful;
embarrassed
3.
长短句运用自然,
如：...
so
painful
that
I
...(结果状语从句);
so
embarrassed
as
to
...
(不定式代替从句);
用分词seeing,
knowing作时间状语使得句子结构简洁。
结束段：
用Although引导让步状语从句作过渡,
引出作者感受;
用more...than...并列结构表达感受,
又用understand
that
...and
that
...两句并列的宾语从句加whenever引导的长句结束全文。
(
实战演练
)
演练1
成长道路上难免遇到来自同伴的压力（peerpressure)。同伴压力可能给我们带来积极或者消极的影响。请结合
自己生活中的一个具体事例谈谈你的体会。
注意：请勿泄露本人真实姓名和学校姓名。
范文：
In
our
daily
life,
we
inevitably
confront
with
peer
pressure.
Though
as
it
is
when
we
experience
it,
it
actually
serves
as
a
motivation
as
long
as
we
make
the
most
of
it.
My
personal
experience
can
be
employed
as
a
case
in
point
to
illustrate
how
peer
pressure
benefits
people.
In
my
first
year
at
high
school.
I
joined
the
drama
club.
As
a
green
hand,
I
was
totally
ignorant
of
how
to
act.
However,
the
other
members
of
the
club
are
skillful
performances,
who
has
some
sort
of
acting
experience
before.
Therefore,
I
was
quite
frustrated.
When
hearing
others
speak
naturally
and
perform
attentively
while
I
was
too
nervous
to
utter
a
word.
But
my
self-esteem
didn’t
allow
me
to
give
up.
Pressed
by
the
fellows’
excellence，I
was
motivated
to
practice
harder.
I
gradually
overcome
My
shyness
and
drew
lessons
from
others
performance.
As
a
result,
I
witnessed
my
skills
improved
and
eventually
become
a
capable
performer
as
my
peers
were.
It
downs
on
me
that
peer
pressure
isnft
necessarily
something
to
be
afraid
of.
Our
peers
act
as
mirrors
from
whom
we
can
reflect
on
ourselves，supporting
our
drawbacks
and
have
making
a
judgment
or
improvements.
Without
these,
competitors,
we
are
likely
to
be
under
the
illusion
that
there
is
no
room
for
improvement,
and
sit
still
in
our
comfort
zones.
It
is
our
peers
who
constantly
remind
us
to
get
motivated.
In
conclusion,
I
maintain
that
peer
pressure
plays
an
indispensable
part
for
us
to
achieve
personal
growth.
It
is
imperative
of
us
to
foster
positive
attitude
towards
it
and
employ
it
as
a
motivation
on
our
voyage
of
life.
演练2
以“礼物”为题写一篇作文。该文必须包括以下内容：
1
你送礼物的对象以及所送礼物
2
该礼物对他（她）可能产生的影响或者带来的变化
范文1
It
is
universally
acknowledged
that
a
good
present
is
of
great
value
to
a
person
and
even
prone
to
change
his
or
her
life.
As
for
me,
one
of
the
most
impressive
presents
I
have
given
to
my
friends
is
a
watch
which
I
had
used
for
more
than
three
years.
The
watch
was
given
to
Tom,
who
is
one
of
my
best
friends.
Diligent
and
warmhearted
as
he
is,
he
sometimes
has
no
sense
of
time,
which
causes
him
to
be
late
for
many
things
and
leads
to
some
trouble
in
work.
By
giving
him
such
a
watch,
I
hope
he
will
pay
more
attention
to
punctuality,
which
will
bring
him
more
credibility
in
life
and
higher
efficiency
in
both
work
and
study.
Besides,
he
used
to
tell
me
that
he
might
feel
lonely
in
the
new
environment
after
leaving
the
old
friends
in
high
school,
and
thus
I
hope
that
such
a
gift
will
remind
him
of
the
good
old
days
we
happily
spent
together
and
help
him
to
feel
better
when
he
misses
me.
Anyway,
I
do
wish
that
Tom
will
like
this
present,
which
hopefully
will
bring
him
good
luck
and
motivates
him
to
fight
for
a
better
future.
范文2
As
it
is
universally
acknowledged
that
presents
may
convey
friendship
and
precious
feelings,
I
have
an
idea
in
my
mind
that
a
unique
gift
should
be
sent
to
my
intimate
friend
who
will
leave
for
the
U.S.A
in
August.
To
begin
with
,
the
present
consists
of
two
parts---one
photo
album
and
a
letter.
As
she
opens
the
album,
the
season
of
happiness
and
the
period
of
sorrow
that
we
shared
together
will
be
unfolded,
thus
locking
the
days
into
her
permanent
memory.
When
she
misses
her
homeland
and
her
friends,
this
album
may
act
as
the
most
effective
medicine
on
her
homesick.
As
for
the
letter,
I
hope
that
it
may
give
her
power
and
courage
when
she
is
depressed.
So
I
will
write
in
the
letter
that
“there
is
no
way
to
happiness,
happiness
is
the
way.
Complete
darkness
may
endure
for
a
night,
but
it
will
never
overcome
the
radiant
light
of
the
morning.”
On
the
whole,
the
present
bears
my
sincere
wishes
and
it
will
become
an
everlasting
symbol
of
our
friendship.
演练3
1、我最难忘的一课
2、具体说明为何难忘
3、感想
An
Unforgettable
Lesson
In
my
life
I
have
experienced
many
important
things.
But
perhaps
the
most
unforgettable
thing
which
is
really
worth
mentioning
is
the
lesson
given
by
my
Chinese
teacher
just
after
she
had
an
accident.
One
morning
just
before
our
Chinese
lesson,
we
were
told
our
Chinese
teacher,
Miss
Liu,
had
had
an
accident.
One
of
her
legs
was
badly
injured
and
she
couldn’t
come
to
teach
us.
While
we
were
planning
to
visit
her
after
school,
we
also
thought
that
maybe
we
would
be
free
to
do
whatever
we
wanted
during
our
Chinese
lesson,
and
hoped
our
homework
load
would
be
reduced.
But
to
our
surprise,
shortly
after
the
bell,
Miss
Liu,
with
the
help
of
a
stick,
came
to
the
door
of
our
classroom.
With
great
respect
w
all
stood
up
and
greeted
her.
She
sat
on
a
chair
and
began
her
lesson.
She
spoke
slowly
but
forcefully.
She
prepared
her
lecture
quite
well
and
demanded
that
we
do
the
same.
Towards
the
end
of
the
lesson,
we
got
lots
of
homework
from
her.
A
good
teacher
is
many
things
to
many
people.
Everyone
has
definite
ideas
about
what
a
good
teacher
is.
In
my
opinion
the
teachers
who
demanded
the
most
from
the
students
are
perhaps
liked
best.
(
巩固训练
)
训练1
临近毕业，回顾三年高中生活，你肯定参加过很多班集体活动。请具体描述你参加过的最难忘的一次活动，并简要说明这次活动对你产生的影响。
How
time
flies!
It
will
be
only
a
month
before
I
graduate
from
my
senior
high
school.
Recalling
what
I
have
experienced,
I
keep
the
military
training
in
mind,
which
was
the
first
class
activity
of
the
life
in
senior
high
school.
With
the
sun
shining
in
the
blue
sky,
we
began
our
military
training
with
great
excitement
and
confidence.
Sweat
falling
down
the
face,
we
stood
like
soldiers.
However,
as
time
went
by,
complaints
emerged
one
after
another.
“Why
must
we
take
part
in
such
a
tough
training?”
“What’s
the
meaning
of
walking
like
that?”
Some
of
my
classmates
even
pretended
to
feel
dizzy
in
order
to
ask
for
a
sick
leave.
But
the
monitor
said,
“Since
we
have
been
here,
why
not
persevere
until
the
last
minute?”
Our
class
teacher
also
encouraged
us
not
to
give
up
halfway.
Inspired
by
what
they
said,
the
whole
class
kept
on
hard
training,
and
won
the
first
place
in
the
competition
eventually,
which
was
the
best
reward
of
the
7-day
efforts.
Not
only
did
the
tough
training
leave
a
deep
impression
on
me
but
it
also
increased
my
courage
of
facing
up
to
great
challenges.
By
taking
part
in
this
unforgettable
activity,
I’ve
fully
realized
that
getting
something
done
is
just
an
accomplishment
and
getting
something
done
well
is
an
achievement.
From
then
on,
whenever
I
meet
with
difficulties
in
my
study,
I
will
always
strive
to
the
best
advantage(努力到最出色).
训练2
人们常会因自己失去的而悲伤，而往往忽略了自己拥有的。请以“Appreciate
What
You
Have”为题，叙述一件自己经历的，或是看到的，或是听说过的事，并谈谈自己的感受。短文包括：
1.对故事的具体描述；
2.简述自己的感受。
Appreciate
What
You
Have
It
seems
that
people
tend
to
shed
tears
for
what
they
have
lost
but
turn
a
poker
face
at
what
they
are
still
holding
tightly
in
hand.
How
much
sorrow
would
vanish
if
people
could
learn
to
appreciate
what
they
have!
Here
is
a
story
I
heard
once.
A
successful
artist
was
being
interviewed.
Suffering
from
a
rare
disease,
the
young
woman
had
to
stay
in
a
wheelchair
and
wasn’t
able
to
speak.
The
interview
went
on
smoothly
until
a
journalist
asked:
“As
a
seriously
disabled,
miserable
person,
why
are
the
teachers
cheerful?”
The
room
fell
into
an
embarrassed
silence,
but
the
woman
didn’t
seem
to
care.
Picking
up
a
piece
of
chalk
with
her
swollen
hand，she
started
writing
on
the
blackboard.
The
words
were
ugly
but
still
powerful:
“I
am
happy
to
have
a
pair
of
beautiful
legs.”
“I
feel
great
to
wake
up
with
sunshine
through
my
window.’’
“I
am
glad
to
have
a
healthy
brain
to
keep
thinking
and
working.
“Most
important
of
all,
I
only
care
about
what
I
have
instead
of
what
I
have
lost.’’
All
the
journalists
present
were
deeply
moved.
Had
the
artist
always
buried
herself
in
woe
of
losing,
she
wouldn’t
have
made
any
progress
and
been
respected
by
healthy
people.
Losing
is
usually
inevitable
and
unavoidable.
So
why
should
we
lose
heart
for
what
we
can’t
change?
By
the
way,
there
is
something
that
we
can
hardly
lose,
such
as
a
bumping
heart，a
movable
hand，and
the
air
around
us,
which
we
are
used
to
turning
a
blind
eye
to
but
can
never
live
without.
Learn
to
treasure
them,
and
your
life
will
be
free
of
regrets
and
misery.
Appreciate
what
you
have.
Don’t
let
your
smile
fade
for
anything
that
doesn’t
belong
to
you.
训练3
每个人在生活中都有被错怪或冤枉的经历，请讲述一个你的故事并谈谈你当时的感受或看法。
Generally
acknowledged
to
us
is
a
proverb,
justice
and
fairness
is
more
brilliant
than
the
sun.
Because
the
sun
can
warm
our
body,
but
can^
warm
our
heart,
while
justice
and
fairness
does.
My
personal
experience
confirms
this.
It
was
a
bright
sunny
day,
and
I
was
greatly
honored
to
be
asked
to
fetch
the
flowers
we
ordered
for
my
beloved
teacher’s
birthday,
with
the
changes
in
my
pocket,
which
was
given
by
my
headteacher
as
my
bus
fee.
I
rushed
out
the
bus,
sang
into
the
store,
and
fetch
our
order.
Everything
went
on
well,
until
I
went
onto
the
bus
and
put
the
given
changes
into
the
box.
“You
didn’t
put
enough
money!”
the
bus
driver
shouted.
I
blushed
under
the
gaze
of
the
whole
bus.
“How
could?
My
headteacher
gave
me
the
money,1
whispered.
My
tear
was
out
of
my
eyes
beyond
my
control
on
hearing
the
following
scoldings.
So
humiliated
was
I
that
I
couldn^
say
a
word.
Without
bring
my
purse,
I
could
do
nothing
but
tearing.
How
I
wished
I
could
have
disappeared!
I
had
never
been
wrongly
sentenced
like
this!
A
soldier
who
was
standing
besides
me
defended
me
by
putting
a
full
ticket
fee
into
the
box,
comforting
me,
t6I
believe
in
you.
It’s
not
your
fault.
You
should
leam
to
justify
yourself.”
Years
later,
I
remember
the
sun
that
day,
and
what
the
soldier
did
for
me.
Justice
is
in
our
heart,
rather
than
in
others9
eyes.
Bearing
justice
in
our
mind
warms
us
from
the
bottom
of
our
heart.
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21世纪教育网(www.21cnjy.com)中小学教育资源及组卷应用平台
(
高考夹叙夹议文写作指导
)
(
知识
导图
)
(
要
点
精析
)
夹叙夹议文是一种比较常见的写作文体,
以记人叙事为主,
记叙人物的经历或事物/事件发生、发展、变化的过程。兼有总结全文，深化主题。材料常涉及社会生活现象、人物或自然景物。无论记人还是叙事都要通过叙述、描写来加以表达,
把人物的经历或行为、发生的事情/事件用一定的顺序和语言技巧叙述出来。在叙述过程中“人以事显,
事由人生”,
人和事是密不可分的。在一篇记叙文中记人、写景、叙事往往是交织在一起的,
不能简单地分裂开。高考作文一般都不会单纯的记叙某事，而是夹叙夹议。
1.
写作结构指导：
结构完整,
内容清楚
一篇记叙文无论长短都应该是一个完全独立的事实,
因此在下笔时必须明确该从何处开始叙述,
何处结束叙述以及应该提供何种事实才能使叙述完整。
中心突出,
详略得当
明确写作目的和叙述的中心思想,
避免空洞的叙述或与主题无关的内容,文章的内容、结构、层次及所用语言都应围绕主题展开进行。叙述时必须繁简疏密相间,
突出主题的内容要加以详细具体的描写,
这样有助于读者对所叙述的人物或事件有个深刻的印象,
而对过渡性的内容作简短的交代即可。
脉络/主线清晰,语言灵活生动
一篇好的记叙文需要直接或间接表达以下六要素：事件发生的时间、地点、人物角色、原因、过程和结果(when,
where,
who,
why,
what,
how)。写作顺序可采用“顺叙”、“倒叙”和“穿插叙述”的方法,
但初学者最好采用”顺叙”的方法进行训练,
即以情节发生时间的先后为序。
为了使叙述生动,
具有吸引力,
必须注意词汇运用得恰当、通顺、简洁和准确,
时态、人称要一致,
注重上下文的相关性、连续性,
以及与表达内容的一致性。
2.
常用句型
.
Vivid
memories
come
flooding
back
to
...
when
I
was
...
.
If
my
memory
serves
me
right,
it
happened
on
...
.
December
27th,
2012
was
the
most
unforgettable
day
for
me.
.
It
dated
back
to
...
.
In
terms
of
appearance,
he
is
of
medium
build,
with
small
and
bright
eyes.
.
He/She
always
wears
a
friendly
smile
on
his/her
face,
which
makes
him/her
pretty
approachable.
.
I
admire
him/her
for
...
.
He/She
is
enthusiastic/strict/hardworking/devoted/humorous/worthy
of
our
respect.
.
It
is
he
who
enlightens
my
mind;
it
is
he
who
taps
my
potential
in...
it
is
he
who
encourages/supports
me
when
I
lose
confidence.
(
课堂典例
)
1
描述你在学校的一次难忘的活动。具体要求如下：
1.
详细描述活动的情况;
2.
简要表述你在活动中的感受。
例文：
Thursday,
December
27th,
2020,
was
the
most
unforgettable
day
in
Senior
Three
for
me.
It
was
the
first
time,
as
well
as
the
last
time
that
I
had
performed
on
the
stage
of
our
school
at
the
closing
ceremony
of
the
School
Art
Festival.
As
scheduled,
the
ceremony
began
at
7
o’clock
that
evening
and
everyone
felt
excited,
awaiting
the
wonderful
performances.
In
fact,
the
performances
were
undoubtedly
sensationally
terrific,
but
I
just
couldn’t
be
fully
absorbed
in
them.
I
was
a
bit
nervous.
At
the
summon
of
the
teacher,
nearly
200
Senior
Three
students,
including
me,
went
to
the
back
of
the
stage
to
prepare
for
our
singing
performance.
Everyone
took
his
place
and
after
that,
I
couldn’t
help
thinking
that
it
was
my
last
Art
Festival
and
that
I
should
spare
no
effort
to
add
a
brilliant
touch
to
it.
Slowly,
the
curtain
was
drawn
up.
There
burst
out
a
loud
applause
in
the
audience,
louder
than
whatever
I’d
heard.
All
the
people
were
expecting
a
great
deal
of
us
and
we
were
standing
still,
every
muscle
ready.
At
the
sound
of
the
music,
we
threw
all
the
nervousness
into
the
wind
and
sang
to
our
heart’s
content.
Together
we
sang
out
our
passion,
our
belief
and
our
dreams.
The
charm
of
the
song
fascinated
everyone
and
our
resounding
voice
lasted
in
the
auditorium.
Absolutely,
we
sang
far
better
than
any
of
the
previous
rehearsals
and
our
performance
turned
out
a
success.
Very
soon,
we’ll
bid
farewell
to
our
beloved
Alma
Mater
and
headed
into
our
bright
future.
However,
the
unforgettable
scene
of
that
day
will
impress
me
upon
my
mind
permanently.
结构点评
引言段：
开门见山点出记叙文的核心要素——时间、地点、人物和事件
中心段：
作者用第一人称,
以时间(黑体画线处)为顺序完整具体地叙述了事件的过程,
同时穿插了动作和心理描写(黑体部分),
画龙点睛式地表达了作者的感受,
突出了主题。
结束段：
回归主题,
突出重点
语言点评
引言段：
短句加长句：It
was
the
first
time
that
sb.
had
done
sth.
(定语从句),
开头简短精练。
中心段：
1.
以时间为顺序陈述事件;
表时间的词语很灵活,
不单调,
如：as
scheduled;
at
the
summon
of
the
teacher;
at
the
sound
of
the
music;
slowly;
turned
out。
2.
动作和心理描写精确,
如：nervous;
couldn’t
help
thinking;
every
muscle
ready;
sang
to
our
heart’s
content。
3.
长短句运用自然、流畅,
如：everyone
felt
excited,
awaiting
the
wonderful
performances
(用分词作伴随状语形象地描写了观众期盼的心情)。
4.
文中还运用了许多并列结构,
如：I
couldn’t
help
thinking
that
...
and
that
...
2
简单叙述一下某天你或一位同学生病(或受伤)后的情况。具体包括:
1.
同学、老师是如何帮助我(他/她)的;
2.
人与人之间的这种相互关爱给我的感受是...
例文
A
few
years
ago,
while
still
in
my
junior
high
school,
I
twisted
my
ankle
in
a
basketball
game.
I
was
attempting
a
lay-up.
And
when
I
landed,
I
landed
wrongly
and
unfortunately
twisted
my
ankle.
Immediately,
my
ankle
became
swollen
and
I
felt
so
painful
that
I
couldn’t
get
up
and
walk.
At
the
very
moment
I
also
felt
so
embarrassed
as
to
just
stay
there
and
not
be
able
to
move.
Seeing
something
going
wrong
with
me,
my
friends
and
my
teacher
came
over
right
soon.
My
teacher,
Mr.
Lee,
first
checked
the
situation
of
my
foot.
Knowing
that
I
couldn’t
play
any
longer,
Mr.
Lee
took
me
up
and
carried
me
out
of
the
court.
Simultaneously,
my
friends
all
gave
me
warm
comfort
and
managed
to
get
me
ice
in
order
to
lessen
the
pain.
Later
on,
my
parents
came
and
picked
me
up.
Then
we
went
to
the
hospital
and
found
out
that
I
wouldn’t
be
able
to
move
normally
for
approximately
a
month.
Although
I
cramped
for
a
month
after
that
unfortunate
incident,
I
felt
more
happy
than
frustrated,
as
I
felt
the
love
coming
from
my
teacher
and
my
friends.
I
was
touched
for
what
they
did
for
me
right
after
I
got
injured.
From
the
incident
I
understood
that
being
loved
and
cared
is
a
blessing
and
that
whenever
I
have
the
ability
to
do
so
for
others,
I
should
always
lend
out
a
helping
hand.
结构点评
引言段：
开门见山点出记叙文的核心要素——时间、地点、人物和事件。
中心段：
作者用第一人称和第三人称(my
teacher
and
friends)穿插,
以时间(黑体画线处)为顺序完整具体地记叙了事件过程,
同时细腻地描写了动作和心理感受(斜体黑体部分),
突出主题。
结束段：
回归主题，突出重点，最后一句升华主题。
语言点评
引言段：
长短句运用自然：while引导的状语从句和when引导的时间状语从句交代了事件发生的时间,
简短精练。
中心段：
1.
表时间的词语很灵活：
副词：immediately,
simultaneously,
later
on,
then;
介词短语：at
the
very
moment;
分词：seeing,
knowing
2.
动作和心理描写精确,
如：painful;
embarrassed
3.
长短句运用自然,
如：...
so
painful
that
I
...(结果状语从句);
so
embarrassed
as
to
...
(不定式代替从句);
用分词seeing,
knowing作时间状语使得句子结构简洁。
结束段：
用Although引导让步状语从句作过渡,
引出作者感受;
用more...than...并列结构表达感受,
又用understand
that
...and
that
...两句并列的宾语从句加whenever引导的长句结束全文。
(
实战演练
)
演练1
成长道路上难免遇到来自同伴的压力（peerpressure)。同伴压力可能给我们带来积极或者消极的影响。请结合
自己生活中的一个具体事例谈谈你的体会。
注意：请勿泄露本人真实姓名和学校姓名。
范文：
In
our
daily
life,
we
inevitably
confront
with
peer
pressure.
Though
as
it
is
when
we
experience
it,
it
actually
serves
as
a
motivation
as
long
as
we
make
the
most
of
it.
My
personal
experience
can
be
employed
as
a
case
in
point
to
illustrate
how
peer
pressure
benefits
people.
In
my
first
year
at
high
school.
I
joined
the
drama
club.
As
a
green
hand,
I
was
totally
ignorant
of
how
to
act.
However,
the
other
members
of
the
club
are
skillful
performances,
who
has
some
sort
of
acting
experience
before.
Therefore,
I
was
quite
frustrated.
When
hearing
others
speak
naturally
and
perform
attentively
while
I
was
too
nervous
to
utter
a
word.
But
my
self-esteem
didn’t
allow
me
to
give
up.
Pressed
by
the
fellows’
excellence，I
was
motivated
to
practice
harder.
I
gradually
overcome
My
shyness
and
drew
lessons
from
others
performance.
As
a
result,
I
witnessed
my
skills
improved
and
eventually
become
a
capable
performer
as
my
peers
were.
It
downs
on
me
that
peer
pressure
isnft
necessarily
something
to
be
afraid
of.
Our
peers
act
as
mirrors
from
whom
we
can
reflect
on
ourselves，supporting
our
drawbacks
and
have
making
a
judgment
or
improvements.
Without
these,
competitors,
we
are
likely
to
be
under
the
illusion
that
there
is
no
room
for
improvement,
and
sit
still
in
our
comfort
zones.
It
is
our
peers
who
constantly
remind
us
to
get
motivated.
In
conclusion,
I
maintain
that
peer
pressure
plays
an
indispensable
part
for
us
to
achieve
personal
growth.
It
is
imperative
of
us
to
foster
positive
attitude
towards
it
and
employ
it
as
a
motivation
on
our
voyage
of
life.
演练2
以“礼物”为题写一篇作文。该文必须包括以下内容：
1
你送礼物的对象以及所送礼物
2
该礼物对他（她）可能产生的影响或者带来的变化
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
演练3
我最难忘的一课
具体说明为何难忘
3、感想
An
Unforgettable
Lesson
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
(
巩固训练
)
训练1
临近毕业，回顾三年高中生活，你肯定参加过很多班集体活动。请具体描述你参加过的最难忘的一次活动，并简要说明这次活动对你产生的影响。
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
训练2
人们常会因自己失去的而悲伤，而往往忽略了自己拥有的。请以“Appreciate
What
You
Have”为题，叙述一件自己经历的，或是看到的，或是听说过的事，并谈谈自己的感受。短文包括：
1.对故事的具体描述；
2.简述自己的感受。
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
训练3
每个人在生活中都有被错怪或冤枉的经历，请讲述一个你的故事并谈谈你当时的感受或看法。
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