2021年1月浙江高考英语读后续写精深分析与同类训练

2021年1月浙江高考英语读后续写精深分析与同类训练
高考真题呈现
????Pumpkin(南瓜）carving
at
Halloween
is
a
family
tradition.
We
visit
a
local
farm
every
October.
In
the
pumpkin
field,
I
compete
with
my
three
brothers
and
sister
to
seek
out
the
biggest
pumpkin.
My?dad?has
a
rule
that
we
have
to
carry
our
pumpkins
back
home,
and
as
the
eldest
child
I
have
an
advantage
——I
carried
an
85-pounder
back
last
year.
????This
year,
it
was
hard
to
tell
whether
my
prize
or
the
one
chosen
by
my
14-year-old
brother,?Jason,
was
the
winner.
Unfortunately
we
forgot
to
weigh
them
before
taking
out
their
insides,
but
I
was
determined
to
prove
my
point.
All
of
us
were
hard
at
work
at
the
kitchen
table,
with
my?mom?filming
the
annual
event.
I'm
unsure
now
why
I
thought
forcing
my?head?inside
the
pumpkin
would
settle
the
matter,
but
it
seemed
to
make
perfect
sense
at
the
time.
With
the
pumpkin
resting
on
the
table,
hole
uppermost,
I
bent
over
and
pressed
my
head
against
the
opening.
At
first
I
got
jammed
just
above
my
eyes
and
then,
as
I
went
on
with
my
task,
unwilling
to
quit,
my?nose?briefly
prevented
entry.
Finally
I?managed?to
put
my
whole
head
into
it,
like
a
cork
(软木塞）?forced
into
a
bottle.
I
was
able
to
straighten
up
with
the
huge
pumpkin
resting
on
my
shoulders.
??????My
excitement
was
short-lived.
The
pumpkin
was
heavy.
“I'm
going
to
set
it
down,
now,"
I
said,
and
with
Jason
helping
to?support?its
weight,
I
bent
back
over
the
table
to
give
it
somewhere
to?rest.
It
was
only
when
I
tried
to
remove
my
head
that
I
realized
getting
out
was
going
to
be
less
straight
forward
than
getting
in.
When
I?pulled?hard,
my
nose
got
in
the
way.
I
got
into
a
panic
as
I
pressed
firmly
against
the
table
and
moved
my
head
around
trying
to
find
the
right
angle,
but
it
was
no
use.
“I
can't
get
it
out!”
I
shouted,
my
voice
sounding
unnaturally
loud
in
the
enclosed
space.?
1.所续写的短文词数应为150左右；
2.应使用5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语；
3.续写部分分为两段,每段的开头语已为你写好；
4.续写完成后,请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。
Paragraph
1:???????
It
was
five
or
six
minutes
though
it
felt
much
longer.?????????????????
Paragraph
2:
??The
video
was
posted
the
Monday
before
Halloween????????????????????
试题分析?
该文本既符合理论要求，也符合基本的命题规律，文本的选择更是十分新颖，贴近生活化，语言真实地道，表达精准。在有趣事件描述的背后体现了一种国外的文化生活，既有诗和远方也很接烟火气。高到跨文化交际的素养培养，低到原汁原味的生活场景的实际运用，充分体现了英语的考察侧重逐步向综合运用能力方面靠拢。
文本概要及六要素
从记叙文的六要素来看，本文主要是以第一人称来进行描述，回忆。具体如下。
语篇概要：在十月份的万圣节，一名少女的脑袋被卡在了南瓜中。引来网上的一片关注。?
?
?
?
?
人物：作者一家人
时间：万圣节
事件：把头塞进南瓜里
地点：作者家里
起因：为证明自己的南瓜最大
结果：头塞入南瓜后拔不出出来，尝试了好多次无果
?
?一般浙江省英语高考的续写可分为?“Conflict-centered”和“Change-centered”两类，而本次续写为前者。主要是以矛盾冲突为主，前期有冲突，作出各种铺垫，后期自然而然会是解决矛盾冲突为主，即最终解决冲突为写作的主要目的。接下来分析文本中出现的矛盾点或者伏笔以及可能的写作方向。
思维导图：
写作依据?
??
?读后续写的目的：读写结合，以读促写。当然阅读为辅，写作为主，那阅读的目的是什么？自然是为下文的写作提供一些背景材料，或者铺垫，作出一些伏笔。比如划线词的一些使用等等。请看具体描述。“All
of
us
were
hard
at
work
at
the
kitchen
table,
with
my?mom?filming
the
annual
event.?”（我们所有人都在厨房里忙着，妈妈每年都会为一年一度的庆祝活动拍摄视频）为下文埋下伏笔，可知续写的内容应该是我妈妈录下来这一切并发到了网上，正好与续写第二段开头“the
video”对应。“I'm
unsure
now
why
I
thought
forcing
my?head?inside
the
pumpkin
would
settle
the
matter,?”（我不知道把我的脑袋塞到南瓜里会不会解决这个问题）同样也是为下文我的头塞进南瓜，拔不出来奠定基础。同时也为续写中寻找外援奠定基础。“I
bent
over
and
pressed
my
head
against
the
opening.?”（我弯下腰把脑袋伸进南瓜口）
The
pumpkin
was
heavy.
“I'm
going
to
set
it
down,
now,"
I
said,
and
with
Jason
helping
to?support?its
weight,（南瓜太重了，需要Jason帮忙）
When
I?pulled?hard,
my
nose
got
in
the
way.
I
got
into
a
panic
as
I
pressed
firmly
against
the
table
and
moved
my
head
around
trying
to
find
the
right
angle,
but
it
was
no
use.（尝试各种办法后，自救无果）等等方面的内容衔接融洽，环环相扣，思维逻辑发展缜密。为下文妈妈把视频传到网上求助埋下伏笔，写作的内容也是水到渠成，跃然纸上。期间的矛盾，冲突，高潮，情绪的变化等真实自然，引人走入一种情境中，脑海中呈现画面感。叙述有很强的代入感。
命题语言表达
?
语言一直是，真实自然，原汁原味，引人入胜，有很强的画面感。一种生活美的体验。各种情绪语言的表达也一直抓住读者的眼球。比如本文采用了一些动作描写“Finally
I?managed?to
put
my
whole
head
into
it,
like
a
cork
(软木塞）?forced
into
a
bottle.”、“When
I?pulled?hard,
my
nose
got
in
the
way.
I
got
into
a
panic
as
I
pressed
firmly
against
the
table
and
moved
my
head
around
trying
to
find
the
right
angle,?”等。同时也运用了一些语法结构等高级句式，使得文本显得更加的有嚼劲。单词简单不是什么所谓的高级词汇，但是表达内容充分详实精准。值得后期朗读背诵分析。
优秀范文1
It
was
five
or
six
minutes
though
it
felt
much
longer.?The
air
inside
the
hollow
vegetable
was
full
of
my
anxious
breath.
I
could
hear
my
sister’s
laughter
and?Jason’s
muffled
voice
talking
about
cutting
the
giant
thing
open.
“No!
Not
my
precious?pumpkin!”
I
protested.
Eventually,?Dad?helped
me
adjust
my
body
to
a
more
relaxed
position,
and?pulled?the
pumpkin
gently
off
my?head.
Hair
in
knots,?nose?and
chain
covered
in
pumpkin
flesh,
I
let
out
a
sigh
of
relief.
That’s
when
I
realized
the
camera
had
been
rolling
the
whole
time!The
video
was
posted
online
the
Monday
before
Halloween.I
looked
just
like
a
pumpkin
head
in
it.
Embarrassed
and
a
little
annoyed,
I
fled
to
my
room,
but?Mom?stopped
me.
“You
haven’t
read
the
comments
yet.”
I
scrolled
down
the
screen
and
marveled
at
the
stories
the
viewers
shared
about
Halloween.
One
girl
recalled
celebrating
it
with
her
brothers
and
sisters,
and
thanked
us
for
“bringing
her
home”.
The
words
brought
warmth
to
my
heart
and
tears
to
my
eyes.
I
felt
lucky
to
be
a
part
of
this
mischievous
yet
loving
family.
(171
words)
出彩表达积累（出自原文及范文）
1.hollow?adj.?中空的；空心的
2.muffled?adj.沉闷的；模糊不清的
3.sigh?n.叹气；叹息
4.marvel?v.感到惊奇；大为赞叹
5.mischievous?adj.顽皮的；捣蛋的
6.scroll
down??向下滚动
7.Eventually,
Dad
helped
me
adjust
my
body
to
a
more
relaxed
position,
and
pulled
the
pumpkin
gently
off
my
head.
最后，爸爸帮我把身体调整到一个比较放松的姿势，轻轻地把南瓜从我头上扯下来。（对动作的生动描写）
8.The
words
brought
warmth
to
my
heart
and
tears
to
my
eyes.
这些话温暖了我的心，使我热泪盈眶。（对神态的生动描写）
优秀范文2
It
was
five
or
six
minutes
though
it
felt
much
longer.Jason?suggested
using
a
knife
to
cut
the?pumpkin?open.
I
waved
my
hands
wildly
in
protest
at
the
plan.
“Then
you
need
to
find
a
way
of?pulling?yourself
out.”
My?dad?said
in
a
calm,
cool
voice.
His
voice
settled
my
nerves.
I
was
conscious
that
my?nose?was
acting
as
an
impediment
to
my
escape.
With
stretching
out
my
face
and
biting
into
the
pumpkin,
I
surmounted
the
large
obstacle
and?managed?to
pull
my?head?out.
A
ripple
of
excitement
ran
through
us
but
the
first
thing
I
saw
was
the
camera.The
video
was
posted
online
the
Monday
before
Halloween.?In
the
space
of
a
week,
it
had
been
viewed
over
a
million
times.
It
filled?Mom?with
greater
astonishment.
Rarely
had
a
pumpkin’s
video
had
so
many
hits
as
this
one.
Dangerous
as
it
is,
some
viewers’
curiosity
was
too
strong
to
resist.
They
left
messages
describing
the
feelings
they
had
while
watching
it.
Some
laughed
at
me,
while
others
praised
my
parents,
who
remained
calm
throughout.
Looking
through
these
reviews,
the
sunlight
peeking
through
our
window,
Dad’s
calm
smile
reflected
his
motto
“All’s
well
with
us,
never
fear”.
(186
words)
出彩表达积累（出自原文及范文）
?nerve?n.神经质；神经紧张
?conscious?adj.意识到；注意到
3.?impediment?n.妨碍；阻碍；障碍
4.?surmount?v.克服；解决
5.?obstacle?n.障碍；阻碍；绊脚石
6.?ripple?n.波纹；细浪；涟漪
7.?His
voice
settled
my
nerves.?
?他的声音使我安定下来。（无灵主语）
8.?It
filled
Mom
with
greater
astonishment.这使母亲尤为惊讶。（对情绪的生动描写）
同语境类题训练
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写的词数应为150左右。
After
dinner
I
went
to
my
friend’s
home.
My
friend
Nick
and
I
had
a
long
night
walk,
sharing
earlier
week
readings
from
comics（连环漫画）to
TV
serials.
It
was
12:00
at
night
when
I
returned
home.
Today
was
Halloween.
As
I
called
out
my
parents,
neither
responded.
Soon
the
doorbell
rang.
Suddenly
a
deep
voice
came
from
my
heart,
“It
can
be
him!”
The
man
whom
I
saw
wanted
help
from
me.
He
was
a
beggar
who
died
at
the
same
day.
As
I
started
to
walk
down
the
stairs,
the
doorbell
rang
a
third
time.
I
seemed
to
see
the
shadow
of
the
same
beggar
outside
the
window.
As
I
tried
to
get
out
of
the
window,
my
legs
were
trying
to
pull
me
back.
I
was
very
frightened
to
open
the
door.
As
I
opened
the
door,
there
was
no
one
but
only
a
letter
on
the
doormat
(垫子).
I
took
the
letter
and
was
about
to
open
it
when
the
phone
rang.
I
shut
the
door
and
felt
my
way
towards
the
phone.
I
again
saw
the
shadow
of
the
beggar
and
this
time
he
was
not
alone.
He
was
with
his
family
staring
at
me
with
a
paper
in
his
hand
saying
“Help”
at
the
window.
When
I
picked
up
the
phone,
a
man
answered
from
the
other
end
“Help
him
and
you
would
be
safe
or...”
and
the
phone
was
hung
up.
I
firstly
thought
this
would
be
a
trick
of
a
friend.
Now
I
was
pretty
terrified
about
what
was
going
on.
I
opened
the
letter
kept
on
the
doormat.
It
had
an
address
printed
on
it—“356A
Beckler
Street,
North
Head,
Mexico”.
I
took
some
money
from
my
wallet
and
was
going
to
give
it
to
the
beggar.
I
tiptoed
(蹑手蹑脚地走)
?to
the
window.
There
was
no
one.
I
thought
he
might
be
living
in
the
address
written
on
the
letter.
So
I
took
out
my
bike
and
it
was
2
o’clock
at
night.
The
weather
was
cold
and
joyful
as
the
children
were
going
to
each
other’s
house
to
celebrate
Halloween.
Paragraph
1:
As
I
reached
the
address,
I
found
that
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
Paragraph
2:
I
asked
my
friends
why
they
called
and
scared
me.
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?